# Help me with a rhyme for my custom book plate **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 30, 2013, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062 "2013-04-30T01:51:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![minionkat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@minionkat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/minionkat)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/1 "2013-04-30T01:51:28Z")
I have decided to spring for custom book plates. I have a friend who is a graphic designer and she has agreed to lay it out for me. I have some ideas and we have talked about it. In doing some research, I found that book plates replaced book rhymes. I am intrigued by book rhymes, but can’t really find any good examples. There is one on [wikipedia](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Book_rhyme). I am leaning toward the fun, vaguely threatening, anti-theft warning. 🙂 I am not a poet. So I turn to you, fair Dopers, for assistance in writing a small book rhyme to be incorporated in my book plate. A few things that may help. There will be a giraffe, perhaps a cat, and a beret. My real name is Kate. So, can you help me with some small rhymes? Pretty please? ---
**Author:** ![psychobunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/54ee81/32.png) [@psychobunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psychobunny)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/2 "2013-04-30T03:22:35Z")
If found, return this book to Kate She paid good money for this plate. ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_A.Robrin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sam_a.robrin/32/14497_2.png) [@Sam\_A.Robrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_A.Robrin)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/3 "2013-04-30T04:12:14Z")
Who’s wearing the beret? Is there a picture of this mini-menagerie? The more information there is to work with, the better the poet can make his decisions. ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/4 "2013-04-30T05:20:36Z")
A tree was killed To print this tract And likewise a thief (if need be) To get it back ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/5 "2013-04-30T06:33:26Z")
The pages ahead Are a treasure indeed. But if you touch one page I will rip off your… heed. ---
**Author:** ![Beastly\_Rotter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/45deac/32.png) [@Beastly\_Rotter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beastly_Rotter)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 8:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/6 "2013-04-30T08:11:59Z")
If this book should chance to roam I will burn down your fucking home. But if this book should e’er be stole They will not find your body whole. ---
**Author:** ![Dave\_Hartwick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7feea3/32.png) [@Dave\_Hartwick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dave_Hartwick)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 10:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/7 "2013-04-30T10:18:30Z")
If, from Kate’s shelf, This book should roam, It is protected By this anti-theft poem. ---
**Author:** ![moriah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b2d939/32.png) [@moriah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moriah)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 12:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/8 "2013-04-30T12:29:19Z")
Who so took this book sealed their fate by Kate; she will cook that crook and descrate their pate. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 12:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/9 "2013-04-30T12:35:22Z")
_Who steals this book Should quickly read it; 'Cause when you’re found I’ll make you eat it._ ---
**Author:** ![Snerky\_Snerk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6bbea6/32.png) [@Snerky\_Snerk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snerky_Snerk)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/10 "2013-04-30T12:45:19Z")
This book of words belongs to Kate, Karma’s watching, please don’t tempt fate. Ask to borrow, but do not steal, for thieves will fall 'neath Karma’s wheel. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 12:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/11 "2013-04-30T12:46:08Z")
_The one who steals my book away May feel his conscience pricking But, should this not suffice, he may Too feel a vicious kicking._ The vigilante library squad strikes again! I’ll try to think of something a little more charming next. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/12 "2013-04-30T13:00:10Z")
_Neither the wilds of Africa nor recess in mind of Seuss would ever provide you refuge from me, the stole book sleuth._ ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/13 "2013-04-30T13:05:04Z")
This book’s a comedy, it makes me laugh; That’s why there is this fun giraffe, Or else a mystery, to make me sweat; And here’s a cat for a comforting pet, Or maybe a romance, let love hold sway, That’s why I’ll need this pert beret; But whatever it is, it belongs to Kate, And if it goes missing, she’ll be quite irate. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/14 "2013-04-30T13:10:42Z")
Something more gentle, perhaps: _Dear Reader: Do read on, but when you’ve quit Please send this back home safe to where it started. This book belongs to Kate, and her to it, And never should the two of them be parted._ ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 1:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/15 "2013-04-30T13:21:08Z")
_It is but for these pages and would not be so kind for Kate’s hard won wages to find selves in a bind._ ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/16 "2013-04-30T13:26:46Z")
or maybe less gentle: _If in a month this tome is not returned, Then agents will come: your house will be burned, Your credit score trashed, your hard drives all crashed, Your family thrashed and your life’s work quite smashed. So don’t be a fool, e’er you live to regret it, Return this book home! You don’t dare to forget it._ ---
**Author:** ![minionkat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@minionkat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/minionkat)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 1:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/17 "2013-04-30T13:32:35Z")
> [@Sam\_A.Robrin](#): > > Who’s wearing the beret? Is there a picture of this mini-menagerie? The more information there is to work with, the better the poet can make his decisions. The giraffe will be wearing the beret. No art yet, still in the planning stages. These are amazing! I should not have checked it out from work, people are wondering why I am laughing when I should be running my morning reports. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/18 "2013-04-30T13:37:59Z")
_Enjoy this loaned collection of pulp and lettered tincture but a thief will suffer from Kate’s heel placed squarely in their sphincter._ ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/19 "2013-04-30T13:51:08Z")
\*Though it seems the sweetest fruit Is plucked from someone else’s vine, Bookshelves are not yours to loot; Buy your own books - this one’s mine. Though the prose be fine and fair, I’ve put something much less nice in. Thieving fingers best beware: Every page is laced with ricin.\* ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/20 "2013-04-30T14:46:41Z")
_This giraffe and friend feline Are here to say, this book is mine Says Kate, who now will also add, If you return it, she’ll be so glad._ [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062.md?page=2)