# Help me with a rhyme for my custom book plate **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 30, 2013, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062 "2013-04-30T01:51:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/21 "2013-04-30T15:48:47Z")
There was a young man who stole this book. I put him in a pot to cook; His boiled remains Were flushed down the drains; Surprising how little time it took. ---
**Author:** ![MovieMogul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f08c70/32.png) [@MovieMogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MovieMogul)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/22 "2013-04-30T16:08:50Z")
Don’t be fooled by the French giraffe Stealing this book is no mere gaffe For if you make Kate A tiny irate She’ll be sure to get the last laugh ---
**Author:** ![minionkat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@minionkat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/minionkat)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/23 "2013-04-30T22:35:14Z")
These are all fantastic! I sent them to my designer and she agrees, I can’t choose just one. We are going to do a set with each of them. I certainly have enough books to merit the print run. I read them to my mother, and we laughed and laughed. You are the most brilliant group of people. I knew I came to the right place. Thank you so much! That being said, if inspiration strikes you, keep them coming. We won’t go to press for a while yet. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/24 "2013-04-30T22:57:50Z")
A giraffe would sooner wear a beret than a friend of Kate’s her trust betray So read this book and then return it or on your head, the beret? She’ll burn it. ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/25 "2013-04-30T23:09:03Z")
Return this book you fushing feef, to my astonished eyes, in disbelief. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/26 "2013-04-30T23:13:25Z")
Cats are cuddly, soft and furry; Steal this book and feel my fury. ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2013, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/27 "2013-04-30T23:14:41Z")
A little long, but I got on a roll. 😃 This charming tome and words within In fairest Kate’s library dwell. So if your thoughts are drawn to sin, And tempted by the Devil’s spell, Take heed these warning words, I plead, Ignore them at your deepest woe, For though you merely seek to read, You’ve sealed your fate and cast your foe. A winsome cat, with grace and fire, Beret’d giraffe, as whimsy’s gift Will creep from page and vent their ire When once you sleep, your end is swift. ---
**Author:** ![moriah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b2d939/32.png) [@moriah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moriah)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2013, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/28 "2013-05-01T01:37:24Z")
> [@minionkat](#): > > These are all fantastic! I sent them to my designer and she agrees, I can’t choose just one. We are going to do a set with each of them. I certainly have enough books to merit the print run. Just change my typo ‘descrate’ to ‘desecrate.’ 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2013, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/29 "2013-05-01T02:36:38Z")
Shakespeare’s plays were never taken, Even by Sir Francis Bacon. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2013, 8:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/30 "2013-05-01T08:25:54Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > Shakespeare’s plays were never taken, > Even by Sir Francis Bacon. Mmm…Francis Bacon… _This page is the beginning but please heed my warning, friend: Should you think to take this book, it soon will be your end._ ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2013, 8:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/31 "2013-05-01T08:27:28Z")
_Here are good writes The best ever wroten But them what would thief them Will surely be smoten._ ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2013, 9:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/32 "2013-05-01T09:57:49Z")
This ain’t your book, you did not earn it Nor those others on yonder walls ‘tis Kate’s, and if you don’t return it She’ll bruise your ovaries or balls mmm ---
**Author:** ![Detroit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/45deac/32.png) [@Detroit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Detroit)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2013, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/33 "2013-05-01T20:26:11Z")
Return this book Dear Sir, I beg you Lest I come And freakin’ frag you ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2013, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/34 "2013-05-01T21:30:23Z")
A book is like a dear, dear friend Hence I neither borrow nor lend. To steal a friend is to make him die, I beg you, friend, let this one lie. ---
**Author:** ![psychobunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/54ee81/32.png) [@psychobunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psychobunny)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2013, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/35 "2013-05-02T00:39:33Z")
To see this day might make you laugh, A fine beret on a giraffe. But careful be to only look. I’ll murder he who takes my book. ---
**Author:** ![minionkat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@minionkat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/minionkat)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2013, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/36 "2013-05-02T00:43:13Z")
This is turning into the best project ever! You guys crack me up. They are all fantastic. I am meeting with the graphic designer tomorrow. It is the first official meeting for us. It is going to be great. Thank you. ---
**Author:** ![TnTangent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a88e4f/32.png) [@TnTangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TnTangent)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2013, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/37 "2013-05-02T01:40:57Z")
May pages wear and bindings crack, The reader’s delight to betoken. But if a thief should take this book, Not just the book’s spine shall be broken. Or: Here’s the only verse within this book, Kate wrote the rest in prose. Pay for this book, for should you steal, She’ll punch you in the nose. ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_A.Robrin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sam_a.robrin/32/14497_2.png) [@Sam\_A.Robrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_A.Robrin)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2013, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/38 "2013-05-02T03:37:38Z")
Camelopard, Kitty, and Kate Would have finders and borrowers know: Return it, and we’ll compensate With a tip of our high-up _chapeau_. ---
**Author:** ![moriah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b2d939/32.png) [@moriah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moriah)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2013, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/39 "2013-05-02T05:14:54Z")
Let me channel some Ogden Nash… The End. …of the lend. Rehome this tome. ---
**Author:** ![Eutychus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Eutychus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eutychus)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2013, 11:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062/40 "2013-05-02T11:10:07Z")
There once was a reader named Kate Her bookishness no one could rate Who borrows this tome And sends it not home Will suffer a terrible fate. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-with-a-rhyme-for-my-custom-book-plate/657062.md?page=3)