# Help me write the world's NEXT highest grossing film of all time. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 26, 2008, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-write-the-worlds-next-highest-grossing-film-of-all-time/446983 "2008-04-26T19:06:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Darryl\_Lict](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7cd45c/32.png) [@Darryl\_Lict](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darryl_Lict)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2008, 7:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-write-the-worlds-next-highest-grossing-film-of-all-time/446983/41 "2008-04-28T07:02:39Z")
[QUOTE=vison] And a cross-species romance. This is largely unexplored territory. [/QUOTE] Huh? Haven’t you ever watched Star Trek: TOS? ---
**Author:** ![Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stranger_On_A_Train)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2008, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-write-the-worlds-next-highest-grossing-film-of-all-time/446983/42 "2008-04-28T14:18:36Z")
[QUOTE=Darryl Lict] Huh? Haven’t you ever watched Star Trek: TOS? [/QUOTE] I think he means terrestrial species. Like, say, an apple and a pomegranate. Freaky, non? Stranger ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2008, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-write-the-worlds-next-highest-grossing-film-of-all-time/446983/43 "2008-04-28T14:51:38Z")
You know what we’ve forgotten? Car chase!!! ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_MB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steve_mb/32/5339_2.png) [@Steve\_MB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_MB)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2008, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-write-the-worlds-next-highest-grossing-film-of-all-time/446983/44 "2008-04-28T15:38:16Z")
[QUOTE=Terminus Est] [QUOTE=Boyo Jim] Did I mention the almost transparent body stockings? And of course, they’re tearing gaps in the material almost every second… [/QUOTE] Sweet Jesus, dude! I thought you were aiming for a PG-13 rating? [/QUOTE] You film enough takes and angles so that you can put together a PG-13 version for the theatrical release and then put some more cuts on the unrated DVD. ---
**Author:** ![Death\_of\_Rats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a6a055/32.png) [@Death\_of\_Rats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Death_of_Rats)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2008, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-write-the-worlds-next-highest-grossing-film-of-all-time/446983/45 "2008-04-28T17:06:36Z")
[QUOTE=kunilou] You know what we’ve forgotten? Car chase!!! [/QUOTE] Ok, so you have the romantic leads chased seemingly randomly through the streets of San Francisco (big jumps over the hills and dodging trollies) while driving whatever 2010/11 concept car is willing to pay us the most to promote, while they are talking on an as yet unreleased Sony Ericsson cellphone. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2008, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-write-the-worlds-next-highest-grossing-film-of-all-time/446983/46 "2008-04-28T17:19:37Z")
**Boyo Jim** , can we get written treatment of this so far? ---
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2008, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-write-the-worlds-next-highest-grossing-film-of-all-time/446983/47 "2008-04-28T17:59:14Z")
Maybe a movie version of Douglas Adams’ **Starship Titanic**. I mean it is would be like a cross between **Titanic** and **Star Wars** , how can you beat that? ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2008, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-write-the-worlds-next-highest-grossing-film-of-all-time/446983/48 "2008-04-28T20:32:23Z")
[QUOTE=Gangster Octopus] Maybe a movie version of Douglas Adams’ **Starship Titanic**. I mean it is would be like a cross between **Titanic** and **Star Wars** , how can you beat that? [/QUOTE] Maybe throw in a military culture with **StarshipTitanic Troopers**. ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2008, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-write-the-worlds-next-highest-grossing-film-of-all-time/446983/49 "2008-04-28T20:36:03Z")
Together at last: Seagal, Vin Diesel, and Chuck Norris. Maybe CGI Bruce Lee in there for good measure. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2008, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-write-the-worlds-next-highest-grossing-film-of-all-time/446983/50 "2008-04-28T20:40:18Z")
[QUOTE=Boyo Jim] Maybe throw in a military culture with **StarshipTitanic Troopers**. [/QUOTE] And throw in Steve Zahn for **Starship Titanic Super Troopers**. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_Draper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Don\_Draper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_Draper)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2008, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-write-the-worlds-next-highest-grossing-film-of-all-time/446983/51 "2008-04-28T20:45:49Z")
What big budget summer blockbuster would be complete without a major role for a supermodel with limited acting abilities? Said supermodel must be cast as a genius scientist who wears glasses. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2008, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-write-the-worlds-next-highest-grossing-film-of-all-time/446983/52 "2008-04-28T21:52:29Z")
[QUOTE=The New and Improved Superman] What big budget summer blockbuster would be complete without a major role for a supermodel with limited acting abilities? Said supermodel must be cast as a genius scientist who wears glasses. [/QUOTE] Obviously you missed the posts on the catfight. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2008, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-write-the-worlds-next-highest-grossing-film-of-all-time/446983/53 "2008-04-29T00:24:19Z")
Ok, I’m starting to outline a script,thanks to some behind the scenes nagging by **5-4-Fighting**. Here’s the skeleton of the first scene: > [@](#): > > Scene: a busy downtown city of the future, but still recognizeable as NYC? SF? Maybe London? A port, anyway, a crossroads of many worlds… Suggestions of an upcoming holiday of some kind, people are buying things and carrying wrapped gifts. > > One man rings a jarring note. He has a look of desperation, downright ill health, maybe even insanity. He looks intently into every face, and as people see him, they recoil. > > Except for one gorgeous woman with a small boy who looks remarkably like a modernized Tiny Tim. (She volunteers at an orphanage and this is one of the kids, we don’t want to saddle our heroine with a rugrat) . > > She sees the sickly man and she is drawn to him like she would be to a hungry puppy. She moves toward him, and asks if she can help. Actually, maybe it’s too early to introduce our heroine. I’m thinkng she should be the first victim of… whatever. A major starlet who gets killed early and shockingly, like Janet Leigh in _Psycho_. ---
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2008, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-write-the-worlds-next-highest-grossing-film-of-all-time/446983/54 "2008-04-29T00:45:20Z")
**Boyo Jim** , I was only suggesting a _brief descriptive outline_, not a script, and only because, with you being a writer and the OP, you might enjoy putting it together. It doesn’t sound like you really want to do it and I’m sorry I suggested it. Here’s the part I promised I’d help with. John Wayne, Arthur C. Clarke, Bruce Lee (CGI) Kate Beckinsale Rhona Mitra Jeff Goldblum Scarlett Johansson Will Smith Jake Gyllenhaal Morgan Freeman Denise Richards Eli Wallach Henry Thomas Meagan Goode Scott Glenn, Cameo Tommy Lee Jones, Cameo Antonio Banderas Jason Statham Emma Watson Daniel Radcliffe Rupert Grint Apple Pomegranate Steven Seagal Vin Diesel Chuck Norris Janet Leigh type. Rick Rubin, Producer Timbaland, Producer Sting, Musical Score, Singer Bono, Musical Score, Singer Bryan Adams, Musical Score, Singer Drug Cartel(s), Executive Producers Scarlett Johansson, Associate Producer Bill Clinton, Executive Advocate ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2008, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-write-the-worlds-next-highest-grossing-film-of-all-time/446983/55 "2008-04-29T02:02:57Z")
Not being a professional writer, I see what I’m doing as a form of outline, thoughwith a little more narrative structure. Your cast of characters about has given me some further insight. I can see a Will Smith Jake Gyllenhaal buddy film, with co-heroines Meagan Goode and Kate Beckinsale. That leaves Denise Richards and Scarlett Johansson to cram in somewhere – one of these 2 should be the early shocking victim. And John Wayne and Morgan Freeman can be some mixture of Yodas, heads in jars, computerized advisors, akin to the Bogey role in _Play it Again Sam_. Wayne will be the voice of action, the id, and Freeman the voice of restraint, the superego. Steven Seagal, Vin Diesel, and Chuck Norris will be the thug team of the supervillain, which suggests we need a younger team of Jet Li and Jackie Chan (okay, he’s gettin a little old, but…) to defeat them. A CGI Bruce Lee is their “voice”. I could see a scene, as an aside, where Nick Cage and Jeff Goldblum simply kill each other off, early, for the amusement of all. ---
**Author:** ![Leiko](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Leiko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leiko)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2008, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-write-the-worlds-next-highest-grossing-film-of-all-time/446983/56 "2008-04-29T02:35:51Z")
I think that whatever the cast, Simon Pegg, Nick Frost, and Bill Nighy all need to show up. (Also Bill Nye, just for kicks.) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-write-the-worlds-next-highest-grossing-film-of-all-time/446983.md?page=2)