Help!! My Friend Has Rabies

OK THIS I NEED HELP HERE… I BELIEVE MY BEST FRIEND AND CONFIDANTE MR BEOWILL, HAS A SERIOUS CASE OF RABIES, HE BITES PEOPLE, AND DESTROYS IMPORTANT PAPERWORK THAT I NEED FOR ENGLISH ASSIGNMENTS, ALONG WITH A LOT OF OTHER STUFF… I PLOTTED ON DESTROYING HIM FOR AWHILE, BUT HE’S MORE WILY THAN I ANTICIPATED…SO IM GONNA HAVE TO ASK ADVICE FROM ALL WHO READ THIS…THANKS