# Help name a gay-bowling team. **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 19, 2002, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894 "2002-12-19T21:06:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894/61 "2002-12-20T19:58:02Z")
Too Cool for Bridge. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894/62 "2002-12-20T20:50:00Z")
Where’s My Finger? The Ball Pin Hammers Spares To Pick Up Hinds In The Gutter ---
**Author:** ![epolo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b487fb/32.png) [@epolo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/epolo)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894/63 "2002-12-20T22:39:24Z")
Split or Swallow? ---
**Author:** ![rostfrei](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7bcc69/32.png) [@rostfrei](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rostfrei)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894/64 "2002-12-20T23:44:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Weirddave \* > \*\*Out of the closet—and into the gutter. \*\* Ah, but some of us are looking at stars! LOL ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2002, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894/65 "2002-12-22T04:04:45Z")
**6969** ---
**Author:** ![HighSoci](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ba8739/32.png) [@HighSoci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HighSoci)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2002, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894/66 "2002-12-22T05:38:31Z")
The Backstreet Boys N’Sync Oh wait… they were already taken… ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2002, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894/67 "2002-12-22T05:58:25Z")
**The Three Dollar Bills** Haj ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2002, 7:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894/68 "2002-12-27T07:33:01Z")
Well? What did they decide? Esprix ---
**Author:** ![MaxTheVool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9fc29f/32.png) [@MaxTheVool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MaxTheVool)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2002, 9:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894/69 "2002-12-27T09:16:25Z")
Perhaps it’s too late now, but… **The Other Team** as in, “he, uhh, plays for the other team” (btw, the hyphen in the thread title gives it quite an interesting little implication) ---
**Author:** ![trader\_of\_shots](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/aeb1de/32.png) [@trader\_of\_shots](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/trader_of_shots)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2002, 11:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894/70 "2002-12-27T11:53:33Z")
8inch Pins 8 balls Each others bitches Super Gay Friends Gay Bowling team Sad Sterotype HEHEHE fags are funny. ---
**Author:** ![Bum\_Farto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/43a26b/32.png) [@Bum\_Farto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bum_Farto)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2002, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894/71 "2002-12-27T15:19:54Z")
Split! My Ass! I guess the little contest is over though. ---
**Author:** ![SC\_Wolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eb9ed0/32.png) [@SC\_Wolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SC_Wolf)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2002, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894/72 "2002-12-27T16:56:35Z")
Too bad, too, because I’d suggest **We’re Here! We’re Queer! And We’re Going Bowling!** ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2002, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894/73 "2002-12-27T17:30:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by hajario \* > \*\ ***The Three Dollar Bills** > > Haj \*\* This is sheer genius! ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2002, 7:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894/74 "2002-12-28T07:42:12Z")
“The Three Dollar Bills?” I’m suddenly of an urge to sing the theme song from “Gilligan’s Island.” “A three dollar bill… a three dollar bill!” 😃 Esprix ---
**Author:** ![BeatenMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3ab097/32.png) [@BeatenMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BeatenMan)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2002, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894/75 "2002-12-28T17:51:00Z")
crap shoot ---
**Author:** ![JohnBckWLD](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d6d6ee/32.png) [@JohnBckWLD](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnBckWLD)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894/76 "2002-12-30T21:36:48Z")
Well, one again, your suggestions were great. I still giggle even time I start reading them. I alphabetized them, put them on a rainbow colored 8 x 14 spreadsheet, framed them. I gave one set to the team captain, BK Mike who can’t stop talking about it. I made a duplicate for Helen, the proprietor of Club 608 in West Babylon who has the whole list hanging prominently on the back wall of her bar by the pool table. If I had to pick a name from the following list[ol][li]All That And Some To Spare[_]The Ambiguously Gay Bowling Team[_]The Alley Queens From Queens[_]Alley Cruisers[_]Apple Polishers[_]Arse Bandits[_]Arse Kings (Angle, Release, Speed & Equipment) [_]Alley Pride[_]The Baby Balls[_]The Back Ends[_]The Benders[_]The Blew Velvets[_]Bette’s Bowlers[_]Britney Spares[_]The Barmaids[_]The Blocked Lane Pansies[_]Back End Approach[_]Ball Handlers[_]Ball Strappers[_]Balls To The Wall[_]The Ball Pin Hammers[_]Blowing For Dollars! [_]Bottoms Up! [_]Bowl Jobs[_]The Back Alley Ballers[_]The Back Alley Strikers[_]The Ball Pinchers[_]The Bathhouse Rollers[_]The Beautiful Strokes[_]Bowls And Sucks[_]The Ball Shiners[_]The Ball Strokers[_]The Blowing Balls[_]Closet Bowlers[_]The Cheesy Cakes[_]The Confirmed Bachelors[_]The Crashing Helmets[_]The Cherry Choppers[_]Crap Shoot[_]Capote’s Cornbowlers[_]Dirty Little Poofters Who Bowl[_]A Dozen Balls In Total[_]Double Wood[_]Don’t Ask Or Tell My Average[_]Each Others Bitches[_]Exit 51 Rest Stop[_]Eight Balls[_]Eight Inch Pins[_]Four For A Split[_]Four Off The Wrist[_]The Fashionably Astute[_]The Fire Island Guttersharks[_]Fifteen Pound Balls[_]For Tops[_]The Four Tops[_]4 Out Of 40[_]Four Guys Playing With Their Balls[_]Four Striking Sodomites[_]The Finger Holes[_]The Fudgers[_]Glitterbowl[_]Greek Church[_]The Gay Lanesmen[_]The Golden Gates[_]Gutter, She Wrote[_]The Gutter Balls[_]The Gutterfingers[_]The Guys Who Already Had Shoes That Color[_]Gobblers Knob[_]Great Balls Of Fire[_]Go Bowl Yourself[_]Guys Who Like Big Balls[_]The Glory Hole(y) Rollers[_]Happy Gays[_]High Ballers[_]Hinds In The Gutter[_]The Hard Way Boys[_]The Hard Woods[_]The Hardwood Rollers[_]The Home Wreckers[_]Heaven Sent Us[_]The Homo Wreckers[_]I’m Not Wearing Those Shoes![_]The Jeff Strykers[_]Judy’s Bowlers[_]Keglin’ Sodomites[_]The Knob Gobblers[_]Liberace’s Lane Legends[_]Limp Wristed Gutter Ballers[_]Lispy Laners[_]Lords Of The Rings[_]The Lilly Boys[_]Liza’s Bowlers[_]Lickity Splits[_]Lanes Bryant[_]The Nathan Lanes[_]One In The Dark[_]Out And In[_]Out Of The Closet—And Into The Gutter[_]The Other Team[_]The Other Gutter Ballers[_]The Outstretched Pinkie! [_]The Pastel Pins[_]The Picked-Up Spares[_]The Pin Boys[_]The Pin Setters[_]The Pinwreckers[_]The Purple People Eaters[_]The Pink Elephants[_]The Pink Pussycats[_]The Poodles[_]The Powder Puffs[_]The Pin Burglers[_]Queer Frame[_]Queenpin[_]Queens Of The Bowling Age[_]Queens Hold Big Balls[_]Rainbowl[_]The Rainbow Warriors[_]Spare Me[_]Spares To Pick Up[_]Splitz! (The Musical!) [_]Step, Two, Three, Swish! [_]Stiff Opposition[_]The Smithers’[_]The Spinners[_]The Split Actions[_]The Stiff Alley Guys[_]Super Gay Friends[_]The Stonewall Sliders[_]6969[_]Split or Swallow? [_]Split! My Ass! [_]Sucks And Bowls[_]The Suckiest Bunch Of Sucks That Ever Sucked[_]The Swallows[_]Strike, You’re Out! [_]The Three Dollar Bills[_]The Ticklers[_]Thtriketh And Thpareth[_]This Glove Hurts My Wrist[_]Too Cool For Bridge[_]The Wrist Masters[_]Thar She Bowls[_]The Alley Of The Dolls[_]The Tossers[_]Tossed Salad In A Bowl (w/Creamy Dressing) [_]There Is A Bowlers Gene[_]Up On All Fours[_]Up Our Alley[_]With All The Sex, We Don’t Have Time To Practice[_]Where’s My Finger? [_]We Really Really Suck! [_]We Suck! (Literally & Figuratively) [_]Who Wants Headpin? We’re Here! We’re Queer! And We’re Going Bowling![/ol]I know I couldn’t…there are just way too many great names to choose from. [/li] As of Friday Night, they hadn’t picked their new name yet, but I lobbied a little for a few of my favorites…namely: **The Confirmed Bachelors, Happy Gays, The Home Wreckers, I’m Not Wearing Those Shoes!, The Jeff Strykers, Queer Frame, With All The Sex, We Don’t Have Time To Practice, Blowing For Dollars!, Bowl Jobs, Eight Balls, Split or Swallow?, Split! My Ass! _and_ There Is A Bowlers Gene** To make it for the four team mates to pick their new name, I put categorized them into 6 groups & put them on a checklist for their next round at the Babylon Lanes, a week from today. • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • Cute • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • All That And Some To Spare The Ambiguously Gay Bowling Team The Baby Balls The Back Ends The Benders The Blew Velvets Closet Bowlers The Cheesy Cakes The Confirmed Bachelors Dirty Little Poofters Who Bowl Each Others Bitches Four For A Split Four Off The Wrist The Fashionably Astute Glitterbowl Greek Church The Gay Lanesmen The Golden Gates Gutter, She Wrote The Gutter Balls The Gutterfingers The Guys Who Already Had Shoes That Color Happy Gays High Ballers Hinds In The Gutter The Hard Way Boys The Hard Woods The Hardwood Rollers The Home Wreckers I’m Not Wearing Those Shoes! The Jeff Strykers Liberace’s Lane Legends Limp Wristed Gutter Ballers Lispy Laners Lords Of The Rings The Lilly Boys The Nathan Lanes One In The Dark Out And In Out Of The Closet—And Into The Gutter The Other Team The Other Gutter Ballers The Outstretched Pinkie! The Pastel Pins The Picked-Up Spares The Pin Boys The Pin Setters The Pinwreckers The Purple People Eaters Queer Frame Rainbowl The Rainbow Warriors Spare Me Spares To Pick Up Splitz! (The Musical!) Step, Two, Three, Swish! Stiff Opposition The Smithers’ The Spinners The Split Actions The Stiff Alley Guys Super Gay Friends The Three Dollar Bills The Ticklers Thtriketh And Thpareth This Glove Hurts My Wrist Too Cool For Bridge The Wrist Masters With All The Sex, We Don’t Have Time To Practice • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • Feminine• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • Bette’s Bowlers Britney Spares The Barmaids The Blocked Lane Pansies Judy’s Bowlers Liza’s Bowlers The Pink Elephants The Pink Pussycats The Poodles The Powder Puffs Queenpin Queens Of The Bowling Age Queens Hold Big Balls Thar She Bowls The Alley Of The Dolls • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • Local • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • **The Alley Queens From Queens Exit 51 Rest Stop The Fire Island Guttersharks Heaven Sent Us The Stonewall Sliders** • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • Naughty • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • Alley Cruisers Apple Polishers Arse Bandits Arse Kings (Angle, Release, Speed & Equipment) Back End Approach Ball Handlers Ball Strappers Balls To The Wall The Ball Pin Hammers Blowing For Dollars! Bottoms Up! Bowl Jobs The Back Alley Ballers The Back Alley Strikers The Ball Pinchers The Bathhouse Rollers The Beautiful Strokes The Crashing Helmets A Dozen Balls In Total Double Wood Eight Balls Eight Inch Pins Fifteen Pound Balls For Tops The Four Tops Gobblers Knob Great Balls Of Fire Go Bowl Yourself Guys Who Like Big Balls The Glory Hole(y) Rollers Lickity Splits 6969 Split or Swallow? Split! My Ass! Sucks And Bowls The Suckiest Bunch Of Sucks That Ever Sucked The Swallows The Tossers Tossed Salad In A Bowl (w/Creamy Dressing) Up On All Fours Up Our Alley Where’s My Finger? We Really Really Suck! We Suck! (Literally & Figuratively) Who Wants Headpin? • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • Political • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • Alley Pride Don’t Ask Or Tell My Average 4 Out Of 40 Lanes Bryant Strike, You’re Out! There Is A Bowlers Gene We’re Here! We’re Queer! And We’re Going Bowling! • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • Crude • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • Bowls And Sucks The Ball Shiners The Ball Strokers The Blowing Balls The Cherry Choppers Crap Shoot Capote’s Cornbowlers Four Guys Playing With Their Balls Four Striking Sodomites The Finger Holes The Fudgers The Homo Wreckers Keglin’ Sodomites The Knob Gobblers The Pin Burglers A lot of the names you all suggested would work very well on a straight or mixed team bowling league. \*\*Once again, great job! T H A N K S \*\* ---
**Author:** ![Sofa\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/58956e/32.png) [@Sofa\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sofa_King)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894/77 "2002-12-30T21:49:20Z")
Man, I’m always late for these things. Still… How 'bout **The Eleven Takers**? ---
**Author:** ![Duke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e8c25b/32.png) [@Duke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894/78 "2002-12-30T22:55:51Z")
Two more late entries coming in from the peanut gallery… **The Oscar Wilde Bunch** and [Mr. Garrison]I’m Not GAY![/Mr. Garrison] ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2002, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894/79 "2002-12-31T04:52:59Z")
**Four Wills with No Grace** ---
**Author:** ![nineiron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/e56c9b/32.png) [@nineiron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nineiron)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2002, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894/80 "2002-12-31T13:46:31Z")
Don’t know if this has been mentioned (no time to read the whole thread, sorry): Back-door strikers? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-name-a-gay-bowling-team/143894.md?page=5)