# Help rename Five! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 25, 2001, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753 "2001-01-25T18:50:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2001, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753/21 "2001-01-26T14:09:04Z")
Mebbe in a homage to A. A. Milne… **NowWeAreSix** (hehe) ---
**Author:** ![nashiitashii](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7c8e57/32.png) [@nashiitashii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nashiitashii)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2001, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753/22 "2001-01-26T14:12:27Z")
Spam in Five Weeks Splunge Breastless Wonder Colonel Klink _BOING_ TODAYisTHEday Crapsicle FUTONcity MyDogAteTheComputer ---
**Author:** ![Bumbazine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bumbazine/32/362_2.png) [@Bumbazine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bumbazine)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2001, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753/23 "2001-01-26T15:20:12Z")
**Dr\_Paprika,** you forgot **Five of Nine.** 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2001, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753/24 "2001-01-26T15:32:39Z")
Doh! ---
**Author:** ![Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/earl_snake-hips_tucker/32/3269_2.png) [@Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earl_Snake-Hips_Tucker)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2001, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753/25 "2001-01-26T15:50:06Z")
Another great fictional character name (and one that I had considered for myself): Anthony Fremont (TZ fans should recognize it) ---
**Author:** ![Fiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e274bd/32.png) [@Fiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiver)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2001, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753/26 "2001-01-26T15:57:32Z")
You guys are the best! I think my next username will: not embody any reference to “Five” or to any other number. not end in “-inator.” not be any of **ssskuggiii** ’s suggestions (“Breastless Wonder?” “Crapsicle?” Where the hell did those come from?). **Mullinator** , life is change. Change is life. **TheThill** , I don’t know if it’s easy to change your name, but I know several around here have done it. **Dr\_Paprika** , you obviously thought long and hard to come up with all those ideas. I really appreciate it. I am ineffably disappointed that **Eve** hasn’t been by here. There is no doubt, anything she suggested would be positively sopping with class and wit. ---
**Author:** ![andyman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8491ac/32.png) [@andyman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andyman)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2001, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753/27 "2001-01-26T16:04:33Z")
I’ve always liked **Snookums**. ---
**Author:** ![Ice\_Wolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/dfb087/32.png) [@Ice\_Wolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ice_Wolf)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2001, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753/28 "2001-01-27T00:12:07Z")
Excuse me, **Five** , but could you let me know whether my reference to “Precious Joe” was correct or not? Just need to know if I’m using the right search engine. Good luck with the name change! ---
**Author:** ![Fiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e274bd/32.png) [@Fiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiver)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2001, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753/29 "2001-01-28T01:39:53Z")
**Ice Wolf** : > [@](#): > > Excuse me, **Five** , but could you let me know whether my reference to “Precious Joe” was correct or not? > > Just need to know if I’m using the right search engine. > > Good luck with the name change! “Possible Joe.” Yes, you’re right, that’s from the juvenile novel Danny Dunn and the Time Machine, and I’m very pleased I wasn’t the only one here who read it. Danny and his friends accidentally took a time machine (which was not a phone booth or a sports car, but an entire _laboratory_, take that, Dr. Who and Doc Brown) forward in time four days, where they picked up an additional copy of their friend Joe (who was already in the lab with them, hence the modifier “Possible” for the future version of himself). Then they took the lab back 200 years, where the time machine broke down and they had an adventure with Benjamin Franklin. Joe and Possible Joe were equal partners in the story, almost like a pair of twins. ---
**Author:** ![Totoro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Totoro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Totoro)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2001, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753/30 "2001-01-28T05:17:06Z")
Crazy Contraption WomenAndChildrenFirst (or as a variation, WomenAndChildrenLast) eviF ParFive EveningDew ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2001, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753/31 "2001-01-28T05:37:47Z")
**Five** , we seem to be hit with mid-winter blahs simultaneously: [Should I change my name?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=57545). How 'bout you change your name to **jti** , and I’ll change to **Five** , and we’ll play with people’s minds? ---
**Author:** ![nashiitashii](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7c8e57/32.png) [@nashiitashii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nashiitashii)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2001, 7:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753/32 "2001-01-28T07:09:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Five \* > You guys are the best! I think my next username will: > > not embody any reference to “Five” or to any other number. > > not end in “-inator.” > > not be any of **ssskuggiii** ’s suggestions (“Breastless Wonder?” “Crapsicle?” Where the hell did those come from?). Hey, I wasn’t awake yet at school and I was bored out of my mind. Remember, this was the day when I taped my breasts down with duct tape. Hmmmm,… GreenTeaMonster Barbasol nilpahCeilrahC ginsengANDhoney ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2001, 7:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753/33 "2001-01-28T07:16:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TheThill \* > \*\*How about **Countless**? > > Btw, is it really that easy to change your name? \*\* Send an email (from your registered SD address) to Tubadiva or me, and we’ll change it for you. We can either deactivate your old name, and you can start with a fresh name, or we can change the name on your current registration, so that you can keep your post count. Just tell us which you prefer. Note: We won’t do this every week for you, so don’t get any bright ideas about changing your name every week. Also note: So far, we are not recycling screen names. Using Slythe, for instance, is out. Lynn Administrator For the Straight Dope ---
**Author:** ![bibliophage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bibliophage/32/7615_2.png) [@bibliophage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bibliophage)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2001, 8:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753/34 "2001-01-28T08:02:23Z")
**Sapient pearwood** ---
**Author:** ![Kat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b19c9b/32.png) [@Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kat)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2001, 10:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753/35 "2001-01-28T10:07:13Z")
Tough Like a Cowboy–because I keep hearing it in a commercial and I’m hoping giving this phrase away will keep it from taking residence in the part of my brain already responsible for crappy song lyrics. Seeing as how it’s 3 o’clock in the morning, perhaps some random free association will give me some ideas to suggest. **Warning** : The following suggestion list has not been subjected to any sort of sanity filter and some of them are based on injokes from other places: Monkey Stomp Fun Size Today’s Mail (or Today’s Male) Death’s Head Mask Faxed Chicken Warper of Reality Stepford-Wolverine Squeaky Penguin The Word Psychotic That’s enough for now…I have to go to bed. ---
**Author:** ![BornDodgy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19b73/32.png) [@BornDodgy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BornDodgy)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2001, 11:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753/36 "2001-01-28T11:57:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Rosebud \* > \*\*Six? > > 😃 \*\* Damn you Rosebud! I wanted to say that!!! 😉 I always wanted to be **Eurotrash** but you are from one of the other continents, right? ---
**Author:** ![Fiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e274bd/32.png) [@Fiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiver)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2001, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753/37 "2001-01-29T13:49:27Z")
**BornDodgy** : > [@](#): > > I always wanted to be **Eurotrash** but you are from one of the other continents, right? That’s right, I’m from one of those non-Europe continents. **Kat** : I like the sound of “Tough Like a Cowboy,” but it’s too long…and I’m not (tough like a cowboy, that is). “Squeaky Penguin” sounds pretty good. **bibliophage** : Please elaborate on “sapient pearwood.” **jti** : Absolutely not. **Lynn Bodoni** : Thanks for the 411. I promise, I won’t be attempting this every week. ---
**Author:** ![Fiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e274bd/32.png) [@Fiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiver)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2001, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753/38 "2001-01-30T16:34:15Z")
I’ve whittled down the current suggestions to the following: Possible Joe Wax Tadpole Phidippides (I know what I told you about these two, **Mjollnir** , but the more I think about them the more I like the sound of them) Gotta say nothing else I’ve read here has really grabbed me. Of course, I’m still waiting for input from **Eve** , who apparently hasn’t even visited this thread. [sub](sniff sniff)[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![puddleglum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puddleglum/32/137_2.png) [@puddleglum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puddleglum)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2001, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753/39 "2001-01-30T16:46:56Z")
If you are a Simpson’s fan how about **Rory Calhoun** or **Shiney McShine**? ---
**Author:** ![Tommy\_the\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/74df32/32.png) [@Tommy\_the\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tommy_the_Cat)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2001, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753/40 "2001-01-30T18:11:48Z")
Given the unicycle link on your homepage, how about **Unifive**? But seeing as how you’ve disavowed any usage of “Five” I doubt it. Or, given that you’re into acting, how about a reference one of the great blacksploitation movies, **Sweet Sweetback**? Or from “Blackadder,” **Baldrick**? Hell, I’ll just list them: \*\*Timmy O’Toole The Big Chicken (the one up in Roswell) PBR Mr. Coke \*\* If I think of any more, I’ll let you know. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-rename-five/51753.md?page=3)