# Help 'the dude" find his new thread titles. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 17, 2017, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206 "2017-06-17T15:09:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 11
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2017, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206/201 "2017-06-22T20:39:12Z")
> [@wolfpup](#): > > What were these pieces of literature that I forgot? > > P.S.- I don’t mean “literature”, it might have been something else. Like maybe a slideshow, or a dream. What was it? > > Yep, sadly, [another real one](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=829313). At least to the extent that trolling is “real”. This just keeps getting better and better. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2017, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206/202 "2017-06-22T20:42:10Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > This just keeps getting better and better. I think he’s using this thread for help with thread ideas. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2017, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206/203 "2017-06-22T20:43:30Z")
😉 > [@cochrane](#): > > Is it bullying? He’s come into the omnibus thread and seems to be taking the ribbing in good humor. I don’t see how it could be bullying if he isn’t offended by it. Whoa! Hold on there! If I’ve learned _one thing_ from The Dope, it’s that _he doesn’t get to decide if it is bullying or not._. If _anyone, anywhere_ could possible be Butt-hurt, to any degree, its **definitely** bullying. And that makes us all horrible, awful -ists of some sort. > [@elucidator](#): > > Are people what’s wrong with everybody? Yes. Too bad somebody beat me to it. ☹ > [@femmejean](#): > > If death by suicide is the cowards way out, is birth by rape the cowards way in? This is actually pretty good. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2017, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206/204 "2017-06-22T20:44:37Z")
I smoked all my drugs. Now I want to smoke my lighter. How can I? ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2017, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206/205 "2017-06-22T20:46:44Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > I think he’s using this thread for help with thread ideas. 😛 I certainly hope so. That’s why it’s for, isn’t it? Here’s another one: **I lost something yesterday. Where is it? Actually, I’m not sure I lost anything, but if I did, where would it be?** ---
**Author:** ![Rick\_Sanchez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e19adc/32.png) [@Rick\_Sanchez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick_Sanchez)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2017, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206/206 "2017-06-22T20:53:53Z")
When I lose weight, where does it go? ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2017, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206/207 "2017-06-22T21:02:36Z")
> [@wolfpup](#): > > …Yep, sadly, [another real one](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=829313)… Dude’s Law: _It is impossible to create a parody thread title that is so ridiculous that, without checking, we can be certain that dude did not actually post it._ ---
**Author:** ![Channing\_Idaho\_Banks](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/channing_idaho_banks/32/250_2.png) [@Channing\_Idaho\_Banks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Channing_Idaho_Banks)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2017, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206/208 "2017-06-22T21:05:52Z")
Will I be able to keep my doctor? ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2017, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206/209 "2017-06-22T21:14:08Z")
> [@Channing\_Idaho\_Banks](#): > > Will I be able to keep my doctor? And two accompanying threads: “He said the check is in the mail. How long should I wait?” and, “He promised not to come in my mouth, but did. Can I swallow it legally?”. ---
**Author:** ![Ruken](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f475e1/32.png) [@Ruken](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruken)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2017, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206/210 "2017-06-22T21:34:50Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > I certainly hope so. That’s why it’s for, isn’t it? Just about everything suggested here that isn’t already a thread desperately needs to be. ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2017, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206/211 "2017-06-22T21:42:33Z")
> [@Rick\_Sanchez](#): > > When I lose weight, where does it go? Corollary: If a human could convert his energy reserves into a vast inflatable sac of methane attached to his gut, would that lower his B.M.I.? ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2017, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206/212 "2017-06-22T21:44:43Z")
> [@Riemann](#): > > Corollary: > > If a human could convert his energy reserves into a vast inflatable sac of methane attached to his gut, would that lower his B.M.I.? Too intellectual. When I suck in my gut, do I lower my BMI? ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2017, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206/213 "2017-06-22T22:37:23Z")
What tools are too dangerous for a dog to use? ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2017, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206/214 "2017-06-22T22:39:52Z")
If catsup is made from cats, what is ketchup made from? ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2017, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206/215 "2017-06-22T22:43:57Z")
> [@Darren\_Garrison](#): > > If catsup is made from cats, what is ketchup made from? Ketamine, of course. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2017, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206/216 "2017-06-22T23:12:52Z")
> [@Walken\_After\_Midnight](#): > > What does a [13 year old girl from the West Coast of the US](http://www.danielsheehan.com/blog/2010/07/19/portrait-of-ema/) have to do with Ireland? Did you think that changing her eyes from blue to green would make her look more Irish? Wow, so fj was searching for images of young teens and giving them Irish photoshop filters? All so he could project his own angst? One would think he’s obsessed with self-image. Had you seen that photo before? If not, how the fuck did you find it? ---
**Author:** ![Walken\_After\_Midnight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b487fb/32.png) [@Walken\_After\_Midnight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walken_After_Midnight)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2017, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206/217 "2017-06-22T23:48:51Z")
> [@Knowed\_Out](#): > > Had you seen that photo before? If not, how the fuck did you find it? Reverse image search. There was only one return, which was the original source. ---
**Author:** ![femmejean](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/0ea827/32.png) [@femmejean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/femmejean)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2017, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206/218 "2017-06-23T00:22:52Z")
> [@Knowed\_Out](#): > > Wow, so fj was searching for images of young teens and giving them Irish photoshop filters? All so he could project his own angst? One would think he’s obsessed with self-image. > > Had you seen that photo before? If not, how the fuck did you find it? No my friend…not at all. I was searching Pintrest for attractive women with short hair and I came across this girl (who I believed at the time was at the least in her teens and at most in her 20s) I changed her eye color to make her eyes more ‘calming’ and IMNSHO, older. I just want that photographer take a picture of her smiling, I would have a body orgasm watching her cute face smile back at me knowing how awkward and a bit creepy my facial expression would be. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2017, 12:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206/219 "2017-06-23T00:27:21Z")
Piss off, you sick piece of shit. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2017, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206/220 "2017-06-23T00:48:19Z")
My piss looks like shit and my shit looks like piss. Should I call a doctor or just turn around on the toilet? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206.md?page=10) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-dude-find-his-new-thread-titles/789206.md?page=12)