# help the new girl, she is lost
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-new-girl-she-is-lost/98703
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [March 17, 2002, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-new-girl-she-is-lost/98703 "2002-03-17T04:31:09Z")
**Posts on this page:** 8
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@raz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raz)
#### Post date: [March 17, 2002, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-new-girl-she-is-lost/98703/1 "2002-03-17T04:31:09Z")
I never realised how HUGE this message board was until i actually got involved in it. Ive been reading Threadspotting for a while. Is it just my slow computer, or does this shit take forever to load. and also idk whick boards to post crap on. typical blonde. anyone here from kansas??
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### Author:  [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)
#### Post date: [March 17, 2002, 4:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-new-girl-she-is-lost/98703/2 "2002-03-17T04:44:40Z")
1. Yes, this shit takes forever. I expected it to improve with the new software but it didn’t. Word is there’s a new server in the offing, but I’ll believe it helps when I see it help. The board is busiest during daylight hours in the US (forget about it at noon on a weekday), followed by evenings. In the middle of the night, US time, it moves fairly well.
2. This is the right place to post your crap. At least, it’s where I post mine.
3. Not me.
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### Author:  [@Tenebras](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tenebras)
#### Post date: [March 17, 2002, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-new-girl-she-is-lost/98703/3 "2002-03-17T04:54:07Z")
Ok boys, by the numbers:
> [@](#):
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> I never realised how HUGE this message board was until i actually got involved in it.
I suppose this could be a GQ, changing the indirect question in the actual post to “How HUGE is this message board?”
A: It’s pretty freaking HUGE. In fact, this board rests on the backs of four giant elephants, who stand on an even larger turtle. What’s underneath the turtle, you ask? Well, it’s turtles all the way down.
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> Ive been reading Threadspotting for a while.
MPSIMS seems like a good fit at first, but then one considers how truly amazing it is to read Threadspotting, and one begins to think that perhaps this is not so mundane and pointless after all. However, then one realizes that one has been talking about oneself in the third person, and decides that one ought to knock it off. Er… yeah. So MPSIMS it is.
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> Is it just my slow computer, or does this shit take forever to load.
Ahh, another tricky one. But I do love a challenge. The gratuitous profanity and sublimated anger inherent in this sentence leans toward the Pit. We do love the pit, but you will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. But I digress. The debatable nature would find a comfortable home in GD, methinks, but they tend to get really excited by less pedestrian questions. IMHO would also work well, since any speculations on your computer and its relation to this board (my guess is second cousin, twice removed) are entrenched firmly in the realm of the wild assed guess, until you supply us with some concrete information. Or we could just ask Bill Gates. I’m sure Bill Gates knows.
Conclusions? About This Message Board. Yes, that came out of left field, but it doesn’t get nearly enough action, and your question does after all relate to the board. Throw it a bone, as it were.
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> and also idk whick boards to post crap on.
Please do not post crap on any of the boards. It’s not particularly sanitary and unladylike in the extreme.
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> typical blonde.
Indeed.
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> anyone here from kansas??
I think we’ve come full circle to MPSIMS. What a beautiful thing is nature, with her transcendent patterns and casual cruelty to small animals, like bunnies.
Welcome to the boards, though.
🆒
Tenebras
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### Author:  [@John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Carter_of_Mars)
#### Post date: [March 17, 2002, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-new-girl-she-is-lost/98703/4 "2002-03-17T15:31:27Z")
Welcome to the board:
If you are lost, there are maps around. The f.a.q. tab at the top of this page has some info. Go to the ATMB (About This Message Board) forum and read there. Like many things in life, the delights of the SDMB will be enhanced by knowledge and practice. 😉
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### Author:  [@Wisest\_Novel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wisest_Novel)
#### Post date: [March 17, 2002, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-new-girl-she-is-lost/98703/5 "2002-03-17T16:05:03Z")
> [@](#):
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> \*Originally posted by blink178 \*
Welcome to the board, **Four-short-of-a-three-man-band**. Sorry, couldn’t resist. Doubt I’ll be the last to say something that lame about your screen name, so I figured I’d at least try to be the first.
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### Author:  [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)
#### Post date: [March 17, 2002, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-new-girl-she-is-lost/98703/6 "2002-03-17T16:21:32Z")
Yes, try ATMB, we discuss board speed there & ways you might be able to make it faster. After all, Im using 56k.
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### Author:  [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)
#### Post date: [March 17, 2002, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-new-girl-she-is-lost/98703/7 "2002-03-17T22:34:38Z")
I’m from Kansas. I come in peace.
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### Author:  [@raz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raz)
#### Post date: [March 17, 2002, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-the-new-girl-she-is-lost/98703/8 "2002-03-17T22:59:13Z")
yes, thank you everybody for all the help. Enderw24, where in kansas? nice to know im not alone here.