# Help! There's no gorgeous men after me! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 16, 2002, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-theres-no-gorgeous-men-after-me/143162 "2002-12-16T20:47:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![epolo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b487fb/32.png) [@epolo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/epolo)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2002, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-theres-no-gorgeous-men-after-me/143162/81 "2002-12-17T16:54:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Rug Burn \* > \*\*Don’t worry, I’ve got your back. \*\* Am I the only one who thought that if **jazzmine** has **Rug Burn** on her back maybe she’s already got her share of male attention? Does making jokes like that disqualify me from chasing anyone? ---
**Author:** ![jazzmine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jazzmine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jazzmine)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2002, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-theres-no-gorgeous-men-after-me/143162/82 "2002-12-17T17:03:31Z")
It actually qualifies you even more for chasing. As long, of course, as you don’t assume that I have my share of male attention. ::looks around:: I don’t see anyone in hot pursuit or anything. ---
**Author:** ![epolo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b487fb/32.png) [@epolo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/epolo)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2002, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-theres-no-gorgeous-men-after-me/143162/83 "2002-12-17T17:05:44Z")
_whew_ Gives chase… ---
**Author:** ![Akatsukami](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ea666f/32.png) [@Akatsukami](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Akatsukami)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2002, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-theres-no-gorgeous-men-after-me/143162/84 "2002-12-17T18:36:42Z")
::chases after **jazzmine** :: ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ecccb3/32.png) [@Lord\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Jim)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2002, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-theres-no-gorgeous-men-after-me/143162/85 "2002-12-17T19:44:44Z")
:: takes off after **jazzmine** :: I know I can out run any of these guys. ---
**Author:** ![Akatsukami](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ea666f/32.png) [@Akatsukami](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Akatsukami)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2002, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-theres-no-gorgeous-men-after-me/143162/86 "2002-12-17T19:50:58Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lord Jim \* > \*\*:: takes off after **jazzmine** :: > > I know I can out run any of these guys. \*\* ::trips **Lord Jim** with his cane:: 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ecccb3/32.png) [@Lord\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Jim)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2002, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-theres-no-gorgeous-men-after-me/143162/87 "2002-12-17T20:15:33Z")
:: brushes himself off and realizes that this might not be as easy as he had thought :: ---
**Author:** ![Lady\_of\_the\_Lake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e19adc/32.png) [@Lady\_of\_the\_Lake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lady_of_the_Lake)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2002, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-theres-no-gorgeous-men-after-me/143162/88 "2002-12-17T21:00:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by MaxTheVool \* > \*\*As a founding member of the **Help, there are no smart, fun and hot women after me** club \*\* Hey! :mad: Hmm…could be that I’m either not smart or not hot or not funny…hopefully there’s only one of those missing from the ‘package’. ---
**Author:** ![MaxTheVool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9fc29f/32.png) [@MaxTheVool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MaxTheVool)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2002, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-theres-no-gorgeous-men-after-me/143162/89 "2002-12-17T23:13:36Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lady of the Lake \* > \*\*Hey! :mad: > > Hmm…could be that I’m either not smart or not hot or not funny…hopefully there’s only one of those missing from the ‘package’. \*\* For the last time, I will **not** take Excalibur and ride forth as the one true king of Britain. Well, unless perhaps _Carmina Burana_ is blasting… ---
**Author:** ![Lady\_of\_the\_Lake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e19adc/32.png) [@Lady\_of\_the\_Lake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lady_of_the_Lake)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2002, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-theres-no-gorgeous-men-after-me/143162/90 "2002-12-17T23:45:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by MaxTheVool \* > \*\*For the last time, I will **not** take Excalibur and ride forth as the one true king of Britain. > > Well, unless perhaps _Carmina Burana_ is blasting… \*\* _pulls out a slightly damp list and crosses out the barely legible words: ‘puppet king your way to power!’_ Well…It’s okay, I guess…I suppose I can keep looking for old wizardly men who are easily manipulated. **And with this, we bring you back to our regularly scheduled gorgeous men chasing after SDMB women!** 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Kn\_ckers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/96bed5/32.png) [@Kn\_ckers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kn_ckers)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2002, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-theres-no-gorgeous-men-after-me/143162/91 "2002-12-18T16:20:32Z")
Oh, are we being chased again? Shoot, I was just catching my breath. _Pant, pant, pant_ Don’t know if I can keep this up much longer! ---
**Author:** ![dcordell1960](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d2c977/32.png) [@dcordell1960](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dcordell1960)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2002, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-theres-no-gorgeous-men-after-me/143162/92 "2002-12-18T16:38:37Z")
I am ready to start chasing. :: But having trouble making up his mind he chases one woman then another then another :: Dan ---
**Author:** ![Frank\_2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8c91f0/32.png) [@Frank\_2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank_2)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2002, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-theres-no-gorgeous-men-after-me/143162/93 "2002-12-18T18:46:51Z")
All this chasing sounds exhausting. I’m off to build a fully-automated, robotic chaser. Then I can sit back and let my FARC bring the women to me. Knowing my luck FARC will rebel against me and keep all the gorgeous women for himself. Damn that FARC, I should never have programmed him that well. Now I need to build a de-FARC-er…Grrrr. Running shoes would’ve been cheaper. ---
**Author:** ![slowhand53](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a698b9/32.png) [@slowhand53](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slowhand53)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2002, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-theres-no-gorgeous-men-after-me/143162/94 "2002-12-18T20:19:40Z")
While I wouldn’t classify myself as “gorgeous”, does cute count? if yes, how many of you will be at the NYC mega-dopefest? I need to figure out if I need to bring my running shoes with me. Just be ready to be kicked out of the club 😃 ---
**Author:** ![jazzmine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jazzmine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jazzmine)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 5:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-theres-no-gorgeous-men-after-me/143162/95 "2002-12-20T05:33:24Z")
Okay boys, I’m remarkably unchased here. All these girls and you guys can’t get organized enough to chase each of us properly? ---
**Author:** ![Jessity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c67d28/32.png) [@Jessity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jessity)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 5:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-theres-no-gorgeous-men-after-me/143162/96 "2002-12-20T05:43:31Z")
I could submit myself as someone to chase. I’m not a six headed monster, really. I promise. ---
**Author:** ![Jessity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c67d28/32.png) [@Jessity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jessity)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 8:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-theres-no-gorgeous-men-after-me/143162/97 "2002-12-20T08:58:01Z")
Well, foo! Maybe I am, after all! ---
**Author:** ![Siege](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dbc845/32.png) [@Siege](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siege)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 11:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-theres-no-gorgeous-men-after-me/143162/98 "2002-12-20T11:49:41Z")
I’m all too chaste and that’s part ofmy problem! Fortunately, I’m a distance runner, lousy at sprinting. :Starts running at a nice easy lope: CJ ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2002, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-theres-no-gorgeous-men-after-me/143162/99 "2002-12-20T14:09:41Z")
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