# Hera, Aphrodite, Athena

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hera-aphrodite-athena/675088>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [November 29, 2013, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hera-aphrodite-athena/675088 "2013-11-29T17:58:27Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 5\
**Page:** 4

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**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\
**Post date:** [December 2, 2013, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hera-aphrodite-athena/675088/61 "2013-12-02T19:41:17Z")

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> [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](#):
>
> Being overlooked here is the fact that the goddesses all tried to bribe Paris:  
> Hera offered to make him king of Europe and Asia, Athena offered wisdom and skill in war, and Aphrodite offered the world’s most beautiful woman, Helen of Sparta, wife of the Greek king Menelaus. Aphrodite also used the Charites and the Horai to enhance her charms with flowers and song.

Four out of the last five posts before yours discuss the bribes.

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**Author:** ![James\_Toothpaste](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e56c9b/32.png) [@James\_Toothpaste](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/James_Toothpaste)\
**Post date:** [December 2, 2013, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hera-aphrodite-athena/675088/62 "2013-12-02T20:54:51Z")

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Aphrodite, goddess of love and beauty.

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**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\
**Post date:** [December 3, 2013, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hera-aphrodite-athena/675088/63 "2013-12-03T00:57:46Z")

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> [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](#):
>
> Being overlooked here is the fact that the goddesses all tried to bribe Paris:  
> Hera offered to make him king of Europe and Asia, Athena offered wisdom and skill in war, and Aphrodite offered the world’s most beautiful woman, Helen of Sparta, wife of the Greek king Menelaus. Aphrodite also used the Charites and the Horai to enhance her charms with flowers and song.

Do recall that these stories were made by the great-great-great-great-great-grandfathers of the Mafia.

Or rather, stolen by them, from the Greeks.

I don’t think they had much of an issue with a little…enticement. Capice?

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**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\
**Post date:** [December 3, 2013, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hera-aphrodite-athena/675088/64 "2013-12-03T01:23:05Z")

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I’ll worship Athena.

But when voting on physical beauty, Aphrodite’s got it. She is it.

It isn’t a “wisdom contest” or a “power contest.” Beauty. Only one answer.

And…yeah…I’m so screwed (and not in a good way.)

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**Author:** ![Mauvaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mauvaise/32/11084_2.png) [@Mauvaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mauvaise)\
**Post date:** [December 3, 2013, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hera-aphrodite-athena/675088/65 "2013-12-03T20:19:56Z")

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> [@BigT](#):
>
> And Hera does have a lot of shit. Pretty much everything I remember from Greek Mythology class had her being pretty evil.

In Hera’s defense, she had kind of a rough early life: eaten by her father at birth then vomited up later. Married off to her brother who then proceeds to fuck around on her with anyone and everyone, god, demi-god, and mortal alike, siring bastards like no one’s business.

You’d be a bit cranky too, I’d think. 😛

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