# Hershey's Smores Bars Make Me Vomit Blood **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 12, 2005, 8:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233 "2005-12-12T08:29:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![MysteryFellow63427](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e4f/32.png) [@MysteryFellow63427](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MysteryFellow63427)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 8:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233/1 "2005-12-12T08:29:53Z")
[Hershey’s Smores Bars](http://store.drsoda.com/hersheyssmores.html) were on clearance for $0.29 at the grocery store today, so I bought three as a what-the-heck impulse buy. How can I describe them? Eating half of one was like having a small, fat, bald man made out of rancid tallow crawl down my throat. Then he took a shit in my esophagus and donkey punched the inside of my stomach until it bled. :: PUKE :: So, what should I do with these other two unopened bars? ---
**Author:** ![Phnord\_Prephect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/df705f/32.png) [@Phnord\_Prephect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phnord_Prephect)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 8:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233/2 "2005-12-12T08:34:15Z")
Return them to Hershey’s with a note descibing what you found objectionable about them, and the empty wrapper. If you like free chocolate, that is. ---
**Author:** ![slaphead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@slaphead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slaphead)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 10:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233/3 "2005-12-12T10:32:57Z")
> [@Phnord Prephect](#): > > If you like free chocolate, that is. I wasn’t aware that Hershey’s had anything to do with chocolate. Every product of theirs I have ever encountered seems to consist of brown food colouring, icing sugar and some sort of blubber, in varying proportions. > [@neuroman](#): > > So, what should I do with these other two unopened bars? Give them to someone you don’t like. Either they’ll barf, or they’ll enjoy them and die a few years sooner. ---
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 12:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233/4 "2005-12-12T12:38:26Z")
> [@slaphead](#): > > I wasn’t aware that Hershey’s had anything to do with chocolate. Every product of theirs I have ever encountered seems to consist of brown food colouring, icing sugar and some sort of blubber, in varying proportions. I just sort of shake my head and laugh when I see those commercials for Hershey bars with folks talking about how much they love chocolate. I mean, seriously - if you actually even just sort of like chocolate, you don’t like those revolting, cloyingly sweet greasy things. They don’t taste a bit like chocolate. ---
**Author:** ![Anastasaeon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Anastasaeon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anastasaeon)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233/5 "2005-12-12T12:44:57Z")
Blech. I _hate_ Hershey’s “chocolate”, and I’m a lover of most things vaguely sweet and chocolate-like (along with the real stuff). Hershey’s “chocolate” always tastes like I ate a stinkbug. Or a bowl of cricket lips. ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233/6 "2005-12-12T16:03:14Z")
Be glad you didn’t try the “Crunchy Frog” … ---
**Author:** ![EmeraldGrue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dc4da7/32.png) [@EmeraldGrue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EmeraldGrue)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233/7 "2005-12-12T17:10:40Z")
Hershey’s, feh. Once I ate a whole lot of Hershey’s Kisses. That night, I dreamed I was eating a brown crayon. _And I could taste it._ ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233/8 "2005-12-12T17:22:42Z")
> [@neuroman](#): > > [Hershey’s Smores Bars](http://store.drsoda.com/hersheyssmores.html) were on clearance for $0.29 at the grocery store today I think therein lies your problem. Is it possible they due to expire soon? ---
**Author:** ![little\_bit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/258eb7/32.png) [@little\_bit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/little_bit)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233/9 "2005-12-12T17:25:37Z")
> [@Ponder Stibbons](#): > > Be glad you didn’t try the “Crunchy Frog” … [Hey I resemble that remark…](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=41575) ---
**Author:** ![Elret](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Elret](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elret)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233/10 "2005-12-12T17:27:44Z")
Wow! I had no idea there was so much hate for Hershey’s! I _love_ those Smores bars, so you can send them straight to me, thanks! ---
**Author:** ![Merkwurdigliebe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/74df32/32.png) [@Merkwurdigliebe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merkwurdigliebe)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233/11 "2005-12-12T17:48:40Z")
> [@neuroman](#): > > [Hershey’s Smores Bars](http://store.drsoda.com/hersheyssmores.html) were on clearance for $0.29 at the grocery store today, so I bought three as a what-the-heck impulse buy. > > How can I describe them? Eating half of one was like having a small, fat, bald man made out of rancid tallow crawl down my throat. Then he took a shit in my esophagus and donkey punched the inside of my stomach until it bled. > > :: PUKE :: > > So, what should I do with these other two unopened bars? OMG neurotic, I just got a visual image of what you said, and I gotta tell you I think it was hilarious. A small fat bald man made of rancid tallow! ---
**Author:** ![Snickers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@Snickers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snickers)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233/12 "2005-12-12T17:49:08Z")
Ewww. Those things are vile. I got some fun size ones, and still can’t bring myself to eat the two I have left. ---
**Author:** ![Neurotik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/91b2a8/32.png) [@Neurotik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neurotik)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233/13 "2005-12-12T18:07:44Z")
> [@Merkwurdigliebe](#): > > OMG neurotic, I just got a visual image of what you said, and I gotta tell you I think it was hilarious. A small fat bald man made of rancid tallow! I think you have me and him confused. 🙂 Anyway, I echo **Elret** here. Those S’mores bars are freaking delicious. All graham crackery and marshmallowey. Good stuff. Please send them my way if you don’t want them. ---
**Author:** ![Elret](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Elret](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elret)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233/14 "2005-12-12T18:30:07Z")
I couldn’t stop thinking about it all morning actually so I totally just went and bought one. Awesome. Next time I’ll grab one for you, too, Neurotik. ---
**Author:** ![aktep](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f0a364/32.png) [@aktep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aktep)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233/15 "2005-12-12T21:54:54Z")
> [@Elret](#): > > Wow! > > I _love_ those Smores bars, so you can send them straight to me, thanks! Me too. And I’ll wash them down with a Coke Zero. I think my tastebuds are broken ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233/16 "2005-12-12T22:00:41Z")
MMmm…I loves me some s’mores bars. Yummy! ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233/17 "2005-12-12T23:56:17Z")
I always thought the plain Hershey’s chocolate bar with almonds and Hershey’s plain chocolate bar were perfectly fine. Some of the more involved concoctions are pretty vile but the simple stuff compared favorably with Godiva’s etc. I’ve tasted several different types of purportedly “super premium” chocolates, and I’m always left wondering what the big fuss is all about. They’re have a smoother and finer texture than Hersheys, but they’re not “OMFG this is amazing! There’s a chocolate party going on in my mouth!” ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2005, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233/18 "2005-12-13T00:46:03Z")
I hope you’re not saying that you took more than one bite if you hated them that much. Personally? I like the things. ---
**Author:** ![MysteryFellow63427](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e4f/32.png) [@MysteryFellow63427](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MysteryFellow63427)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2005, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233/19 "2005-12-13T02:29:44Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > I hope you’re not saying that you took more than one bite if you hated them that much. Well, after I took the first bite I got a funny feeling that something might be wrong, but I ignored it and plowed ahead for a couple more bites at which point the error of my ways became apparent. > [@ivylass](#): > > I think therein lies your problem. Is it possible they due to expire soon? Let’s see, there doesn’t appear to be any expiration date anywhere on the bars. I’m pretty sure they’ll be legally comestible right up until the rapture. **Emerald Grue** , eating a brown crayon would be a step up, as long as it was a quality Crayola crayon and not some cheap sepia knockoff. On the plus side, the store was also selling jumbo sized Hershey’s Symphony bars for $0.99. Now, those aren’t quite Godiva but they’re pretty tasty. ---
**Author:** ![Sylkyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/da6949/32.png) [@Sylkyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sylkyn)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2005, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233/20 "2005-12-13T02:38:07Z")
I love Hershey Kisses, and sometimes Hershey’s with almonds, but that’s about it. I know they aren’t the height of chocolate lovers’ bliss, but they definitely do in a pinch. However, those S’more things are revolting. I wouldn’t pay for anything with rotted marshmallow in it…or even fresh marshmallow. That alone makes 'em nasty. If my kids won’t eat them, then I can understand why they were practically giving them away. I prefer Belgian chocolate (well, of COURSE) but if one can’t afford it most (re: all) the time, then Hershey’s, Nestle’s or if I’m really feeling “frisky” (and affluent) Godiva does just fine. Hey, a fix is a fix. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hersheys-smores-bars-make-me-vomit-blood/335233.md?page=2)