# He's really leaving - prepare for my imminent crisis **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 22, 2002, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hes-really-leaving-prepare-for-my-imminent-crisis/129065 "2002-09-22T01:41:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![scott\_evil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@scott\_evil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scott_evil)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2002, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hes-really-leaving-prepare-for-my-imminent-crisis/129065/1 "2002-09-22T01:41:43Z")
I posted about this a few months ago, but now it looms upon me. My best friend is leaving Montreal forever, in a week. He’s going to travel through Australia for a year, then plans on settling in Toronto, because his French sucks. I know - Toronto, not that far. But it’s not that. It’s that he won’t be physically _here_ for me when I need him. I have friends in Montreal, but not a one compares to Ryan. Our friendship and love is so deep I can’t put it into words. He was my first boyfriend, when we were teenagers, scared every day of being bashed at school. We grew up together. We both moved to Montreal after we broke up, and although we had a rocky relationship at first, we settled into a very warm and soothing friendship that has lasted years. On November 28, 1999, we celebrated what would have been our 10-year anniversary. We’d always come to each other’s aid when things were rough. I’d lend him money; he would do the same for me. No questions asked, no judgment. He needed Windows 98 SE, so I gave him the CD. He went to Europe for a few months, so I took in Bunny. (I have Bunny now, permanently.) But it’s going to end soon. Even when he moves to Toronto, it won’t be the same. I’ll be alone here. I’m grateful to have Doper friends, but it really isn’t the same. We’re going to see each other one last time before he goes, probably next week. I’m dreading that final hug. I’ll be a mess. ☹ > [@](#): > > It lay buried here, it lay deep inside > But it’s so deep that I don’t want to talk about it > To anyone > It could take me all my life > But it would only take a moment to > Tell you what I’m feeling > But I don’t know if I’m ready yet > You come walking into this room > Like you’re walking into my arms > And what would I do without you? - Kate Bush, “Love and Anger”, 1989. That was our song. ☹ ☹ ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2002, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hes-really-leaving-prepare-for-my-imminent-crisis/129065/2 "2002-09-22T01:43:05Z")
_BIG ASS HUG_ If you need me, I will be there for you. ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2002, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hes-really-leaving-prepare-for-my-imminent-crisis/129065/3 "2002-09-22T01:57:08Z")
Oh, damn, Scott, I’m sorry. I’ve moved away from my best friend, and I still miss him. We chat every once in awhile via e-mail or phone, but the daily work lunch is a thing of the past. Hang in there. Just because he’s in Toronto doesn’t mean you guys still can’t be friends. (Forgive my ignorance, but how far is Montreal from Toronto?) ---
**Author:** ![Ice\_Wolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/dfb087/32.png) [@Ice\_Wolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ice_Wolf)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2002, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hes-really-leaving-prepare-for-my-imminent-crisis/129065/4 "2002-09-22T03:09:26Z")
According to [this](http://www.indo.com/distance/) , Montreal and Toronto are 312 miles apart “as the crow flies”. I feel for ya, **scott evil**. Had a scare back in 2000 when my best friend said she was thinking of moving far, far away (further than that, but still in th’ country.) I was in shock. Thankfully, she didn’t go in th’ end. 🙂 {{{ **scott evil** }}} ---
**Author:** ![Lissla\_Lissar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@Lissla\_Lissar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissla_Lissar)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2002, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hes-really-leaving-prepare-for-my-imminent-crisis/129065/5 "2002-09-22T03:31:51Z")
That sucks. Hugs aplenty. I met my best friend in school, and I had the privilege of sharing an apartment with her for a year. She’s at school in Texas now, and we write long sad emails to each other all the time- it’s too expensive to call regularly. I miss her almost every day. She’s my favorite person in the world- or so my fiance says. Blast, now I’m crying. ☹ LOTS of hugs. ---
**Author:** ![racinchikki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@racinchikki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racinchikki)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2002, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hes-really-leaving-prepare-for-my-imminent-crisis/129065/6 "2002-09-22T03:42:07Z")
Oh wow, **Scott** , I know how you feel. My best friend and I met almost ten years ago, and we were inseparable… now she lives in Connecticut (only two hours away), has no job and no phone, and I haven’t seen nor heard from her in months. Wow do I miss her. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2002, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hes-really-leaving-prepare-for-my-imminent-crisis/129065/7 "2002-09-22T03:51:21Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Hastur \* > _ **BIG ASS HUG** _ Hell, let me give your big ass a hug, too. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2002, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hes-really-leaving-prepare-for-my-imminent-crisis/129065/8 "2002-09-22T03:54:20Z")
Shit, scott … {{{big ass hugs and big whatever other hugs you need}}} [sub];)[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Eats\_Crayons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Eats\_Crayons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eats_Crayons)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2002, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hes-really-leaving-prepare-for-my-imminent-crisis/129065/9 "2002-09-22T04:09:21Z")
He’s _mine_! He’s mine! Mwah-ha-ha-ha!!! Seriously though, I solemnly promise to kick his arse if he isn’t in touch with you regularly, even if that means driving him to Montreal for a visit myself. And my GF is an Aussie, so we’ve got friends in _all_ the right places and can co-ordinate our butt-kicking efforts to fully guarantee that he’ll be in touch with you, and hangin’ out on Ste. Catherine, so regularly that he’ll naver have the chance to lose what little French he has. Pfeh! Thinks he can move to T.O. and leave Scottie behind, does he? Wait’ll he wakes up one morning on the steps of the Oratoire! That’ll show him! ---
**Author:** ![Cosmopolitan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/94ad74/32.png) [@Cosmopolitan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cosmopolitan)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2002, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hes-really-leaving-prepare-for-my-imminent-crisis/129065/10 "2002-09-22T04:27:21Z")
I feel for you, man. Hugs aplenty. ---
**Author:** ![Cosmopolitan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/94ad74/32.png) [@Cosmopolitan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cosmopolitan)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2002, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hes-really-leaving-prepare-for-my-imminent-crisis/129065/11 "2002-09-22T04:27:21Z")
I feel for you, man. Hugs aplenty. ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2002, 6:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hes-really-leaving-prepare-for-my-imminent-crisis/129065/12 "2002-09-22T06:34:24Z")
**scott** , I really feel for you. It is hard to go through, and if you’re anything like me, you’ll be crying pretty hard at the end. **{{{{scott evil}}}}** Lots of hugs, love, empathy, and whatever else you need in there, all right? F\_X ---
**Author:** ![BoBettie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2002, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hes-really-leaving-prepare-for-my-imminent-crisis/129065/13 "2002-09-23T01:49:12Z")
I went through my best friend moving away almost 3 years ago, and it was awful. I’m happy to report that I’m moving south and will be living within an hour drive of her soon. I know how hard this is. I’m sorry for you.