# Heterosexuality, a crime? **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [February 29, 2000, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670 "2000-02-29T22:00:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2000, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670/1 "2000-02-29T22:00:00Z")
Heterosexuality has been legal throughout much of human history. Heterosexuals have started almost every war that has ever been fought. heterosexuals commit close to 100% of all rapes and child molestations. The overwhelming majority of murders, robberies and other crimes are committed by heterosexuals. Most drug addicts are heterosexual. Heterosexuals create children and then abandon them. Most heterosexual marriages end in divorce. Given that heterosexuality is so obviously detrimental to society and the world, isn’t it about time we gave some thought to making it illegal? I think we should. ---
**Author:** ![DoctorJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctorj/32/2904_2.png) [@DoctorJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DoctorJ)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2000, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670/2 "2000-02-29T22:04:00Z")
Don’t forget–Hitler was a heterosexual. Dr. J * * * “Seriously, baby, I can prescribe anything I want!” -Dr. Nick Riviera ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2000, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670/3 "2000-02-29T22:17:00Z")
I agree wholeheartedly. It should be illegal for women to have sex with any man. With one exception. Moi. ---
**Author:** ![Nu\_Vo\_Da\_Da](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/97f17d/32.png) [@Nu\_Vo\_Da\_Da](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nu_Vo_Da_Da)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2000, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670/4 "2000-02-29T22:21:00Z")
Can we make that _two_ exceptions please? Otherwise I’m in complete agreement with y’all here. ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2000, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670/5 "2000-02-29T22:24:00Z")
Nope, gonna have to be three, or my wife will be unfit to live with. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2000, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670/6 "2000-02-29T22:26:00Z")
Fine. Three. But no more. ---
**Author:** ![Dirt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/898d66/32.png) [@Dirt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dirt)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2000, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670/7 "2000-02-29T22:39:00Z")
There, there. We’ll all be much happier when they snip our nards and cart us all to Australia. ---
**Author:** ![DoctorJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctorj/32/2904_2.png) [@DoctorJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DoctorJ)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2000, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670/8 "2000-02-29T22:43:00Z")
The way I do it, it ought to be a crime. Awww, yeah. Dr. J * * * “Seriously, baby, I can prescribe anything I want!” -Dr. Nick Riviera ---
**Author:** ![JillGat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9fc29f/32.png) [@JillGat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JillGat)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2000, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670/9 "2000-02-29T23:30:00Z")
[[Heterosexuality has been legal throughout much of human history. Heterosexuals have started almost every war that has ever been fought. heterosexuals commit close to 100% of all rapes and child molestations. The overwhelming majority of murders, robberies and other crimes are committed by heterosexuals.]] Although I see where you’re going with this, I hate to say it Otto, but you are describing **MALES** more specifically than heterosexuals (and some of em are probably closet cases). And don’t get me wrong - like you I _loves_ males! Jill ---
**Author:** ![siva](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/7c8e57/32.png) [@siva](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/siva)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2000, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670/10 "2000-03-01T00:55:00Z")
Otto I understand what you’re saying, and partially agree, and I’m not disagreeing with you. I think you’re missing the big picture. My feeling is that heterosexuals do not commit all those crimes, humans do. Don’t forget, the Germans didn’t kill all those Jews, humans did. The Chinese are not accused of poor judgement in human rights, humans are. Those NYC city cops that shot that man over 40 times, were human. The judge and jury were also human for letting them get away with it. Humans are capable of doing anything. Stupidity and ignorance follows humans no matter what age or color or creed or sexual orientation. ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2000, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670/11 "2000-03-01T01:20:00Z")
Gosh, Otto- haven’t you been reading your gay propaganda??? Aren’t you aware that warmongers like Alexander the Great, Julius Caesar, the entire Spartan army, and Frederick von Steuben were gay? ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2000, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670/12 "2000-03-01T03:37:00Z")
Gosh, I guess that’s why I said **almost** all of the wars. ---
**Author:** ![jab1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ee7513/32.png) [@jab1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jab1)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2000, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670/13 "2000-03-01T03:43:00Z")
**siva** , you need to check another thread here in Great Debates entitled “Homosexuals, a crime?” Some moron named Orion started it. * * * \>\ \_ **L\_\_\_L** ---
**Author:** ![jab1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ee7513/32.png) [@jab1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jab1)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2000, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670/14 "2000-03-01T03:46:00Z")
Oh, hell, you DID post on that other thread. Oops. [groveling] (Now you know why I make so many posts. At least a third of them are corrections!) * * * \>\ \_ **L\_\_\_L** ---
**Author:** ![Nu\_Vo\_Da\_Da](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/97f17d/32.png) [@Nu\_Vo\_Da\_Da](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nu_Vo_Da_Da)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2000, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670/15 "2000-03-01T04:55:00Z")
Let’s not forget the bible here people…can non-heterosexuals commit adultery? I think not. How about that whole “thou shalt not covet thy neighbors wife” bit, think that was intended for heterosexual or homosexual people? All in all I think it’s pretty clear who’s been doing most of the sinning in human history. Of course this doesn’t mean that God doesn’t love heterosexuals, he just thinks they need a little more guidance with regards to sinful desires, thats all. ---
**Author:** ![neutron\_star](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/51bf81/32.png) [@neutron\_star](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/neutron_star)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2000, 7:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670/16 "2000-03-01T07:57:00Z")
WILL SOMEBODY PLEASE THINK ABOUT THE CHILDREN?!! Those horrible heterosexuals are trying to convert all of the fine, upstanding gay children of the world into HETEROSEXUAL HEATHENS! They’re turning the kids on to their perverted lifestyle one by one, RIGHT UNDER OUR NOSES! If you don’t believe me, just look at the studies proving that up to 90% of people are heterosexuals! These perverts are doing such a thorough job that there’s hardly any honest, moral, God-fearing fudgepackers left! I, for one, am OUTRAGED! 🙂 * * * I am the user formerly known as puffington. ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2000, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670/17 "2000-03-01T15:28:00Z")
As comedienne Lynn Lavner once said, “There are 326 admonitions against heterosexuals in the Bible. There are 3 admonitions against homosexuals in the Bible. It’s not that God loves homosexuals more, it’s just that He thinks heterosexuals need more guidance.” Then there was that guy from Bloom County: “Guns don’t kill people, people kill guns! With guns! People with guns shouldn’t be gunning down guns, people should be gunning for people who hate guns! With people! And guns!” Or something to that effect. Esprix * * * Next time I want your opinion I’ll beat it out of you. ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2000, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670/18 "2000-03-01T15:30:00Z")
Ooo, and if its not a sin, then can I covet my neighbor’s husband? PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE? Esprix ---
**Author:** ![Nu\_Vo\_Da\_Da](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/97f17d/32.png) [@Nu\_Vo\_Da\_Da](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nu_Vo_Da_Da)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2000, 6:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670/19 "2000-03-02T06:15:00Z")
Well, I don’t see anything against it in the Bible, you might as well go for it! ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2000, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670/20 "2000-03-01T19:45:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Nu Vo Da Da: > > Well, I don’t see anything against it in the Bible, you might as well go for it! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! How about my brother-in-law’s brother? He’s a hottie! Or the mail boy here at work? He _could_ be my neighbor! Or my high school class president? He lived in the same town - that’s considered a neighbor! Man, I could get used to this Vatican II stuff! Esprix * * * Next time I want your opinion I’ll beat it out of you. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heterosexuality-a-crime/17670.md?page=2)