# Hey baby, wanna dry hump? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 1, 2009, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641 "2009-04-01T21:16:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Rand\_Rover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/db5fbb/32.png) [@Rand\_Rover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rand_Rover)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2009, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641/1 "2009-04-01T21:16:47Z")
God I could go for a good dry hump right about now. OK not really. The concept of dry humping just crossed my mind for basically no reason and I sat here for a good minute laughing my ass off (and no one came into my office thank the little baby jesus). Dry humping is just funny. It reminds me of being a good christian teenager groping around with good christian girls, both knowing that we wouldn’t “go all the way” but god wouldn’t mind a little fully clothed writhing about. I wonder if an inexperienced would-be Lothario ever killed his chances at a real hump by going for the dry hump when the participants were well into the age where just having sex would be expected. Has anyone ever made dry humping porn? Surely. And just the more general idea of thrashing around but not ever getting anything accomplished is pretty funny. And dogs on legs, that’s funny (but I guess this particular hump isn’t always dry exactly). So, are there any concepts that just pop into your head from time to time that make you laugh? ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2009, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641/2 "2009-04-01T21:28:26Z")
Libertarianism. ---
**Author:** ![Ace309](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ace309/32/1050_2.png) [@Ace309](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ace309)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2009, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641/3 "2009-04-01T21:29:39Z")
Dennis Rodman: “I got cookies out the ass. Cookies out the ass.” It makes me laugh myself silly at random intervals. ---
**Author:** ![picker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/picker/32/13969_2.png) [@picker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/picker)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2009, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641/4 "2009-04-01T21:48:16Z")
Objectivism. ---
**Author:** ![Sage\_Rat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sage_rat/32/399_2.png) [@Sage\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sage_Rat)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2009, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641/5 "2009-04-01T21:54:22Z")
Liberalism. Conservativism. Communism. Socialism. (Figured we may as well round out the bunch.) ---
**Author:** ![Rand\_Rover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/db5fbb/32.png) [@Rand\_Rover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rand_Rover)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2009, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641/6 "2009-04-01T21:55:37Z")
> [@picker](#): > > Objectivism. :rolleyes: (at you trying to get my goat, not that you laugh at Objectivism, which I could give two shjits about). Go dry hump yourself. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2009, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641/7 "2009-04-01T23:00:46Z")
> [@Rand\_Rover](#): > > :rolleyes: (at you trying to get my goat, not that you laugh at Objectivism, which I could give two shjits about). Go dry hump yourself. [Moderator Admonition]Insults and persecution complexes belong in The BBQ Pit, not IMHO.[/Moderator Admonition] ---
**Author:** ![Rand\_Rover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/db5fbb/32.png) [@Rand\_Rover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rand_Rover)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2009, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641/8 "2009-04-01T23:57:08Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > [Moderator Admonition]Insults and persecution complexes belong in The BBQ Pit, not IMHO.[/Moderator Admonition] No admonition for Picker? ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2009, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641/9 "2009-04-02T00:44:04Z")
> [@Rand\_Rover](#): > > No admonition for Picker? Nope. If **Picker** claims to find Objectivism laughable, baring claims of mind reading on your part, you are just going to have to accept the answer as valid. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2009, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641/10 "2009-04-02T00:46:01Z")
> [@Rand\_Rover](#): > > No admonition for Picker? For what? Anyway, if that’s the criteria, I’d go after **Sage Rat** first. He’s apparently trying to get _everyone’s_ goat. Which is one that sets me to chucklin’ whenever I think about 'em. Goats, that is. 'Cause then I inevitably think about that thread about goat cannons. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2009, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641/11 "2009-04-02T00:46:23Z")
“dogs on legs” is now making me giggle. I’m picturing a beagle on stilts. > [@](#): > > Nope. If Picker claims to find Objectivism laughable, baring claims of mind reading on your part, you are just going to have to accept the answer as valid. This also made me giggle. ---
**Author:** ![Rand\_Rover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/db5fbb/32.png) [@Rand\_Rover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rand_Rover)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2009, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641/12 "2009-04-02T02:03:45Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > Nope. If **Picker** claims to find Objectivism laughable, baring claims of mind reading on your part, you are just going to have to accept the answer as valid. That’s some good modding work there, Lou :dubious: Anyway, back to the dry humping. Gonna need a linky to the “goat cannon” thread please, thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2009, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641/13 "2009-04-02T02:05:31Z")
> [@Rand\_Rover](#): > > That’s some good modding work there, Lou Why, thank you! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Stauderhorse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@Stauderhorse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stauderhorse)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2009, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641/14 "2009-04-02T02:17:29Z")
There’s a line from the book _The Hot Zone_ that makes me laugh when taken out of context: > [@](#): > > Humans in space suits make monkeys nervous. It’s not a particularly funny book, but I read it a few days ago and that line keeps popping into my head at inappropriate times. ---
**Author:** ![Sitnam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Sitnam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sitnam)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2009, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641/15 "2009-04-02T02:23:57Z")
900 number fortune telling. ---
**Author:** ![Rufus\_Xavier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@Rufus\_Xavier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rufus_Xavier)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2009, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641/16 "2009-04-02T02:31:48Z")
The “Yo Gabba Gabba Magic Dance Hat.” I saw a commercial for this today, and I had hysterics trying to imagine my daughter actually wearing it. [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/7BA_of6Cfi4/hqdefault.jpg "Yo Gabba Gabba Magic Dance Hat Commercial") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7BA_of6Cfi4) ---
**Author:** ![Rand\_Rover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/db5fbb/32.png) [@Rand\_Rover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rand_Rover)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2009, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641/17 "2009-04-02T02:35:38Z")
> [@Rufus\_Xavier](#): > > The “Yo Gabba Gabba Magic Dance Hat.” I saw a commercial for this today, and I had hysterics trying to imagine my daughter actually wearing it. > > [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7BA\_of6Cfi4](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7BA_of6Cfi4) Oh christ jesus in heaven sitting at the right hand of the lord god almighty. That’s it, I’m throwing every TV we have in the trash until every kid is past puberty. I can’t take Barney–Yo Gabba Gabba could push me over the edge. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2009, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641/18 "2009-04-02T03:06:42Z")
> [@Rand\_Rover](#): > > Gonna need a linky to the “goat cannon” thread please, thanks. [Here ya go.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=41020) ---
**Author:** ![devilsknew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4da419/32.png) [@devilsknew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/devilsknew)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2009, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641/19 "2009-04-02T03:20:39Z")
You laugh, but one of the most erotic experiences of my life was a dry hump in the back of a mini-pickup with a cab. She is the same size as me… 6’2" and a whole lotta lovin’. Steamy, tinted, fishbowl, windows… testing the suspension. I wanted it all… but she wasn’t on birth control and nobody had a condom. I blame that experience for not “closing the deal” and why she isn’t with me today. ---
**Author:** ![Richard\_Parker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/35a633/32.png) [@Richard\_Parker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Richard_Parker)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2009, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641/20 "2009-04-02T03:30:37Z")
[The Hawaii Chair](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E9_amg-Aos4). [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-baby-wanna-dry-hump/491641.md?page=2)