# Hey Dickless, Clark! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 6, 2011, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dickless-clark/605228 "2011-12-06T03:21:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Darth\_Panda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ee7513/32.png) [@Darth\_Panda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Panda)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2011, 1:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dickless-clark/605228/81 "2011-12-07T13:40:13Z")
> [@kferr](#): > > So Dick Clark is tea-bagging ducks now? As is his wont. ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2011, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dickless-clark/605228/82 "2011-12-07T14:02:22Z")
Ladies and gentlemen, take my advice: Fuck this lame pitting and riff on wet mice. ---
**Author:** ![Gedd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gedd/32/4938_2.png) [@Gedd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gedd)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2011, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dickless-clark/605228/83 "2011-12-07T14:46:49Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > Would those be bags of white mice? Brown mice? Wild mice? Not sure, the bags were closed. I’m pretty sure there were mice in them though because the word “MOUSES” was stenciled on the side of each one. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2011, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dickless-clark/605228/84 "2011-12-07T15:34:38Z")
_Love to eat them mousies… mousies what I love to eat! Bite they little heads off, nibble on they tiny feet._ -B. Kliban ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2011, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dickless-clark/605228/85 "2011-12-07T15:40:49Z")
> [@Inigo\_Montoya](#): > > Anyway, like I was sayin’, mice is the fruit of the pantry. You can barbecue 'em, boil 'em, broil 'em, bake 'em, saute 'em. Dey’s uh, mice-kabobs, mice-creole, mice gumbo. Pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried. There’s pineapple mice, lemon mice, coconut mice, pepper mice, mice soup, mice stew, mice salad, mice and potatoes, mice burger, mice sandwich… Fruits of the Sea (i.e. The Navy) is much more versatile. Nothing like pan-fried seamen. ---
**Author:** ![kferr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/71e660/32.png) [@kferr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kferr)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2011, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dickless-clark/605228/86 "2011-12-07T15:51:17Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > Would those be bags of white mice? Brown mice? Wild mice? Mice-a-roni the San Francisco treat! ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2011, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dickless-clark/605228/87 "2011-12-07T17:17:18Z")
> [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](#): > > Ladies and gentlemen, take my advice: > Fuck this lame pitting and riff on wet mice. How do you fuck a bag of wet mice? Sounds kinky. ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2011, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dickless-clark/605228/88 "2011-12-08T00:16:21Z")
> [@Rick](#): > > How do you fuck a bag of wet mice? Very carefully. ---
**Author:** ![Vita\_Beata](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a9a28c/32.png) [@Vita\_Beata](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vita_Beata)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2011, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dickless-clark/605228/89 "2011-12-08T00:41:17Z")
> [@kferr](#): > > Mice-a-roni the San Francisco treat! Laughing at that cheesy joke. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2011, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dickless-clark/605228/90 "2011-12-08T00:48:53Z")
> [@Vita\_Beata](#): > > Laughing at that cheesy joke. 😃 Well, it _was_ very carefully Krafted. ---
**Author:** ![DHMO](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecc23a/32.png) [@DHMO](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DHMO)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2011, 10:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dickless-clark/605228/91 "2011-12-08T10:29:41Z")
> [@Inigo\_Montoya](#): > > Anyway, like I was sayin’, mice is the fruit of the pantry. You can barbecue 'em, boil 'em, broil 'em, bake 'em, saute 'em. Dey’s uh, mice-kabobs, mice-creole, mice gumbo. Pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried. There’s pineapple mice, lemon mice, coconut mice, pepper mice, mice soup, mice stew, mice salad, mice and potatoes, mice burger, mice sandwich… that’s…that’s about it… ---
**Author:** ![Canadjun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/76d3ee/32.png) [@Canadjun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Canadjun)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2011, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dickless-clark/605228/92 "2011-12-08T16:25:51Z")
Q: How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Two. Or three if they want to be kinky about it. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2011, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dickless-clark/605228/93 "2011-12-08T18:16:21Z")
> [@bucketybuck](#): > > You think rape is funny? No, but I do think “Blazing Saddles” is hysterical. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![j666](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9de0a6/32.png) [@j666](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/j666)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2011, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dickless-clark/605228/94 "2011-12-09T02:15:59Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > _Love to eat them mousies… > mousies what I love to eat! > Bite they little heads off, > nibble on they tiny feet._ > > -B. Kliban I love that drawing. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dickless-clark/605228.md?page=4)