# Hey Dr. Phil! Up your ass with a red hot poker! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 24, 2003, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919 "2003-12-24T22:28:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2003, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919/21 "2003-12-25T21:39:25Z")
Your cousin isn’t making it clear. Dr. P’s position is straightforward in most instances. The fact is, some of us have a harder row to hoe than others, yes. But it’s not an excuse for never taking control of your life. Have compassion for yourself and others, but seek solutions. It’s not that complex, really. ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919/22 "2003-12-26T02:10:05Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by quiltguy154 \* > \*\*Why don’t folks see the absolutely transparent bullshit in their spiels? Is it because they all want the quick, but dubious answers they receive from most talking heads, rather than taking control of their lives and figuring it out for themselves? Self-examination is not easy and can be painful, but at least it’s a growth experience. “Give a man a fish…” \*\* Your statement above sounds exactly like the kind of thing Doc Phil says. He strongly advocates “self-examination”. He makes sure he lets people know that his advice is NOT a “quick fix” and that the real work starts after they go home, and that nothing he’s telling them to do is “easy”. I enjoy watching it too, I “yell” at the guests, and am astounded that they can’t see what everyone else can see. But as someone else mentioned, he does come up with a gem or two, now and again. The only difference between him and non-celebrity/well-known psy-guys is his celebrity status. He’s not saying anything different from other psychologists, that is, other than the expected differences in schools of thought (are they Freudians or other). The angst and irritation over his sort cracks me up. Now Dr Laura I can understand, that woman is vicious and hateful. Dr. Phil is the first to state that he doesn’t know everything, and that he’s not saying anything other than plain common sense. ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919/23 "2003-12-26T02:12:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Stink Fish Pot \* > \*\*For crying out loud… every time I watch this bozo, he’s hawking his own books, his son’s books, his website, or his freak-a-do Chucky-doll-eyes wife’s advice. > \*\* PS, I do wonder about his wife though, she doesn’t seem to smile very much, and she almost always wears black. ---
**Author:** ![geewhiz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f0a364/32.png) [@geewhiz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/geewhiz)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919/24 "2003-12-26T02:37:43Z")
I like the fact that he believes people should take responsibility for themselves. He doesn’t believe in the “victim of society” mentality or that someone else has complete control over your life. I am not a fan of the victim mentality either. We are adults, we make decisions…people need to stop blaming everyone else for their problems. ---
**Author:** ![minor7flat5](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/minor7flat5/32/258_2.png) [@minor7flat5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/minor7flat5)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919/25 "2003-12-26T05:03:08Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Stink Fish Pot \* > **Yes, I vote with my remote. But occasionally, I stumble on this crap and watch.** Unfortunately, the powers that be at my gym have chosen his channel to be shown on the sacred televisions in the cardio room. I sometimes drown him out with music, but it is hard to avoid watching a TV that is in front of your face. At least on Sunday, they have football on for us to watch. ---
**Author:** ![Critical1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@Critical1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Critical1)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 8:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919/26 "2003-12-26T08:54:48Z")
I have only seen his show once and his advice while not ground breaking was pretty solid. some times we know the answer but we just need to hear it from somone else. that I felt was his real power, hes just the guy who tells you what you need to hear to pull your head out of your ass and get going with whatever changes you need to make. but I can see where enough is enough. ---
**Author:** ![IWLN](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b5ac83/32.png) [@IWLN](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IWLN)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 11:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919/27 "2003-12-26T11:00:53Z")
I stopped watching Dr. Phil when I joined SDMB a couple of months ago. I _do_ have my priorities straight(dope). When you can get such clear answers in the pit, who needs him? I do have a question though. Whenever I ask my husband if something I’m wearing makes my butt look big, he gets all nervous and jerky. Dr. Pit, do you think this means something or do I just have baggage left over from my childhood? Is there a book I can buy? :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Rieux](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/aeb1de/32.png) [@Dr.Rieux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Rieux)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 11:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919/28 "2003-12-26T11:38:26Z")
[Dr. Phil] “I wanna be Miss America.” [Dr. P] ---
**Author:** ![butter\_pie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/aca169/32.png) [@butter\_pie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/butter_pie)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 12:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919/29 "2003-12-26T12:35:58Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by CanvasShoes \* > \*\*PS, I do wonder about his wife though, she doesn’t seem to smile very much, and she almost always wears black. \*\* And what, pray tell, is wrong with THAT? _suspicious glare_ :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![SkipMagic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skipmagic/32/20706_2.png) [@SkipMagic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkipMagic)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919/30 "2003-12-26T14:13:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jinwicked \* > \*\*And what, pray tell, is wrong with THAT? _suspicious glare_ :dubious: \*\* Obviously, she’s a witch. Burn her! ---
**Author:** ![ouisey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9fc29f/32.png) [@ouisey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouisey)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919/31 "2003-12-26T15:15:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Rabid Child \* > \*\*His audience members creep me out. They’re the same types that can be found on “Oprah” or “Emeril LIVE!”. The camera pans out to these people with their large sheep eyes and remind me of a cult. I’ve seen clips of the Heaven Gate cult look less creepier than these audience members. > \*\* Why do those Emeril people get so excited?? Because of a little cayenne? Whenever they pan the audience, I always expect to see some topless girl bouncing on a guy’s shoulders…its that kind of rock-concert excitement. ---
**Author:** ![GrizzRich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7ba0ec/32.png) [@GrizzRich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrizzRich)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919/32 "2003-12-26T15:16:23Z")
It seems that most of his advice comes in the form of “Quit being a prick” -or- “Take some responsibility” I think it’s the southern accent that reels them in. ---
**Author:** ![Skammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skammer/32/143_2.png) [@Skammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skammer)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919/33 "2003-12-26T16:47:03Z")
Thanks a lot, **Beagledave**. “You don’t need a lesson in astrophysics to cha-cha-cha all night long.” ---
**Author:** ![Avalonian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ee7513/32.png) [@Avalonian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Avalonian)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919/34 "2003-12-26T16:55:07Z")
From **beagledave** ’s link: “You don’t need a rope to throw a brick at a turtle.” … but it sure helps. Thanks Dr. Phil! ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919/35 "2003-12-26T17:10:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by IWLN \* > \*\* Whenever I ask my husband if something I’m wearing makes my butt look big, he gets all nervous and jerky. Dr. Pit, do you think this means something or do I just have baggage left over from my childhood? Is there a book I can buy? :eek: \*\* This means something. (Gonna build a mountain, in your living room) If he says yes, you’re mad (in his eyes, at least) because he just called you fat. If he hesitates, then you thinks he needs to consider whether it makes you look fat, so (to you) it means he must already think you’re fat. You following? So, the only way out is for him to act as though he is borderline insane. One other option: Do what I do… When my latest ex-GF\* asked me, “Does this dress make me look fat?” I immediately replied, “NO! It’s your big ass that makes you look fat.” Saves much wear and tear on the relationship, let me tell ya… \*I’m NOT gay! ---
**Author:** ![Moe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moe/32/2972_2.png) [@Moe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moe)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919/36 "2003-12-26T17:20:30Z")
“You don’t need gonorrhea to shave a weasel.” Ain’t it the truth? ---
**Author:** ![IWLN](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b5ac83/32.png) [@IWLN](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IWLN)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2003, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919/37 "2003-12-26T18:30:48Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by NoClueBoy \* > \*I’m NOT gay! (hmm…that’s funny. I heard somewhere that he was. Maybe it was his fat, old girlfriend.) ---
**Author:** ![Siege](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dbc845/32.png) [@Siege](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siege)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2003, 10:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919/38 "2003-12-27T10:55:59Z")
Actually, I caught the beginning of his show yesterday, and he _did_ give good advice. The situation’s apparently an on-going business involving an entire family: husband, wife, and two teenage daughters, one of whom is 15 years old and pregnant. The family’s apparently in rather bad shape (wouldn’t you have to be to go on one of these shows?). The father has had at least two affairs and the mother was about to ask for a divorce before she found out about the daughter’s pregnancy. There’s some debate about what to do with the child. The father strongly wants the family to keep and raise the child because he never knew his father; I’m not sure how everyone else felt about it. The clip they showed from a prior episode where Dr. Phil asked each member of the family in turn if they would think their family would be a good candidate to adopt the child if they were an outside adoption agency, starting with the mother and non-pregnant daughter. Each of them said, “No,” although it did take a bit a bit of prodding to get the father to admit it. The pregnant daughter also agreed. An old friend of mine stopped by for a Christmas visit, so I’ve no idea what happened next (anyone want to fill me in?), but I liked the way he got the family to take an objective look at the situation. CJ ---
**Author:** ![IWLN](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b5ac83/32.png) [@IWLN](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IWLN)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2003, 11:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919/39 "2003-12-27T11:05:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Siege \* > Actually, I caught the beginning of his show yesterday, and he _did_ give good advice. > > The situation’s apparently an on-going business involving an entire family: husband, wife, and two teenage daughters, one of whom is 15 years old and pregnant. The family’s apparently in rather bad shape (wouldn’t you have to be to go on one of these shows?). It was a re-run. The child kept her child. Her parents still hate each other. They won’t let the biological dad have any part in the baby’s life and that’s all I know. I stopped watching it. That baby should have been given up for adoption!!! Just goes to show, even with a show, Dr. Phil can’t get people to do the right thing either.☹ ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2003, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-dr-phil-up-your-ass-with-a-red-hot-poker/220919/40 "2003-12-27T15:09:52Z")
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