# Hey, folks! It's the Second Coming! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 5, 2000, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598 "2000-01-05T22:36:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![John\_Corrado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a88e4f/32.png) [@John\_Corrado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Corrado)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2000, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598/1 "2000-01-05T22:36:00Z")
No, no, no. Nothing to do with Jesus or Rapture or anything like that. I’m just ranting and raving about the freaking trolls. Begin rant. Hi, there! Make some threads up so that you can claim to be some sort of super-secret-agent even though you can’t figure out where most government agencies are _actually located_. While you’re at it, talk about secret conspiracies and government-cover-ups and The Truth like you stepped out of an X-Files parody. Gather together with the other lunatic trolls, such as those who talk constantly about their ‘secret evidence against evolution’ and who feel the need to throw in idiotic one-line comments upon _every freaking thread they read_, or post their twelve page thoughts in a series of twenty-three messages, keeping a single thread alive only to hear themselves babble. And once those trolls join you, throw about a few death threats and insults, will you? Thanks! And then, to freaking well top the whole shebang, when you get kicked off for abusive, insulting, threatening behavior, come right back as a new name, and keep the charade of your little fantasy world going! Woo hoo! Fun for everyone! Y’know, I found being witnessed to a bit off-putting; maybe even a bit irksome. But at least most of the people who came over from LBBB thought they were doing right, and since coming over several of them have acted as rational, intelligent, and witty posters. But whatever anger I felt towards them is nothing, absolutely miniscule, to my hatred, my despisal, my absolute frothing wish to stick his hand in a blender for the real trolls that have suddenly popped up. End rant. * * * JMCJ This could be YOUR sig line! For just five cents a post, JMCJ Enterprises will place YOUR sig line at the bottom of each message! ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2000, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598/2 "2000-01-05T22:46:00Z")
I really liked the secret space stations placed where we can’t see 'em. Wouldn’t that preclude communicating with them also? I may be wrong about that, but weren’t we unable to talk to the Apollo astronauts when they were on the far side of the moon? –UncleBeer, Current Agent– ---
**Author:** ![Jodi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/7feea3/32.png) [@Jodi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jodi)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2000, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598/3 "2000-01-05T22:52:00Z")
ACTUALLY, I THINK THE WHOLE COMPUTER IN THE CAR THING WAS A STROKE OF GENIUS (EVEN THOUGH THESE SUPER-SECRET PORTABLE BRAIN-IMPLANT-RUN PC’S ALL HAVE THE CAPS-LOCK KEY STUCK ON). IT’S REALLY FREED UP MY ABILITY TO POST! HERE I AM, DRIVING DOWN THE FREEWAY, STEERING WITH MY LEFT ELBOW, AND TALKING TO YOU! ISN’T TECHNOLOGY GR — AIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEE! _Crash_ * * * Jodi _Fiat Justitia_ ---
**Author:** ![Navigator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/4af34b/32.png) [@Navigator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Navigator)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2000, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598/4 "2000-01-05T22:56:00Z")
SHES DEAD JIM ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2000, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598/5 "2000-01-05T23:21:00Z")
Aw, crap. I feel dirty now. I was finally goaded into posting in the finger/agent debacle on GD. Can anyone offer absolution for an freelance apathetic? Or should I just take a shower and await my ‘final check’? –UncleBeer, Retired Agent– ---
**Author:** ![John\_Corrado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a88e4f/32.png) [@John\_Corrado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Corrado)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2000, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598/6 "2000-01-05T23:30:00Z")
Unfortunately, absolution can only be provided when The Finder locates you. This will take some doing, as he needs to contact every single MB you have every posted to, and every single person you have ever e-mailed, in the hopes that someone can give him the information he needs. Admittedly, were The Finder the person he states he is, he could just get up from his desk, go over to Human Resources, and ask for the home address of FORMERAGENT. Okay, so here’s my betting pool: Is FORMERAGENT/The Finder: A) Phadreus, looking for more personalities to talk to; B) A LBMB member who has decided to disrupt and annoy this board in the way that he thinks ‘all of us’ did to ‘his’ board; C) A 14-year-old boy getting his jollies; D) The people they really claim to be? I’m open to other suggestions. Current odds are running: A) 3:1 B) 3:1 C) 5:1 D) 100,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000:1 * * * JMCJ This could be YOUR sig line! For just five cents a post, JMCJ Enterprises will place YOUR sig line at the bottom of each message! ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2000, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598/7 "2000-01-05T23:33:00Z")
Can I combine B and C for 10:1? –UncleBeer, Ale Assassin– ---
**Author:** ![Gr8Kat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gr8kat/32/18668_2.png) [@Gr8Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gr8Kat)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2000, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598/8 "2000-01-05T23:33:00Z")
How about E) loverock all over again? (ie, regs putting on a show for the amusement/annoyance of everyone else) * * * “I hope life isn’t a big joke, because I don’t get it,” Jack Handy [The Kat House](http://members.aol.com/gr8kat1/KatGen/home.htm) [Join the FSH Webring](http://members.aol.com/gr8kat1/KatGen/fshwebring.htm) ---
**Author:** ![FORMERAGENT](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a3d4f5/32.png) [@FORMERAGENT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FORMERAGENT)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2000, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598/9 "2000-01-05T23:37:00Z")
Yessiree, that The Finder guy bugs me, too. Sheesh! ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2000, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598/10 "2000-01-05T23:38:00Z")
I think E would be a longer shot than A,B or C. Maybe 25:1. Cut me off a slice of A. Just out of spite. -a- ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2000, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598/11 "2000-01-05T23:41:00Z")
Oh, it’s the Pit! What was I thinking?? **FORMERHUMAN:** Yes, you are very entertaining. We’re all very proud of you. Now go up to your room and Mommy will bring you a nice cup of milk with your fucking anti-psychotic meds. ---
**Author:** ![Gr8Kat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gr8kat/32/18668_2.png) [@Gr8Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gr8Kat)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2000, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598/12 "2000-01-05T23:44:00Z")
I don’t think it’s a longshot at all. Look, FORMERAGENT was banned, but now he’s back. How can that be? Why, someone else has picked up the name, just as Sterling North did with Contestant #3. Go ahead, give it long odds, but I’ll place my bet and be a rich woman come outing day 🙂 * * * “I hope life isn’t a big joke, because I don’t get it,” Jack Handy [The Kat House](http://members.aol.com/gr8kat1/KatGen/home.htm) [Join the FSH Webring](http://members.aol.com/gr8kat1/KatGen/fshwebring.htm) ---
**Author:** ![FORMERAGENT](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a3d4f5/32.png) [@FORMERAGENT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FORMERAGENT)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2000, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598/13 "2000-01-05T23:51:00Z")
Someone else? ---
**Author:** ![John\_Corrado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a88e4f/32.png) [@John\_Corrado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Corrado)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2000, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598/14 "2000-01-05T23:52:00Z")
Okay, so let’s see. Andros- have you down on A at 3:1. UncleBeer- That’s a Daily Double; odds are 8:1, but the payoff is 10:1. Care to go for the full Trifecta- it’s a 14-year-old boy from the LBMB who has been posting for the last month under the alias “Phaedrus”? Odds are 50:1, but the payoff is 100:1. Gr8Kat- Hmmm. Alright, let’s talk about option E, that it’s all just a prank. You’ve put out good evidence regarding the re-appearance of FORMERAGENT. On the other hand, if it is a prank, the timing was just plain shitty (sure! hit us with a troll just as we’re trying to rationally deal with the LBMBers!), and the humor is less parodical and less incisive than anything I’ve seen from loverock. So let’s add options E and F. E) FORMERAGENT, and, by association, The Finder, were always joke-trolls made up by other regs. Odds- 12:1. F) The post-banning FORMERAGENT is a joke-troll, but the original FORMERAGENT and The Finder weren’t. Odds- 2.5:1. Any other takers? * * * JMCJ This could be YOUR sig line! For just five cents a post, JMCJ Enterprises will place YOUR sig line at the bottom of each message! ---
**Author:** ![Felice](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a88e4f/32.png) [@Felice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Felice)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598/15 "2000-01-06T00:00:00Z")
(sigh…) I’m still waiting to hear about the extra planets. But John, I guess you can put me down for ©. Sounds 14 to me. ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Derfel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/bb73d2/32.png) [@Lord\_Derfel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Derfel)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598/16 "2000-01-06T00:19:00Z")
If lurkers are allowed to place bets, what odds will you give me on: G) a couple of drunken frat boys who decided to skip school and came out of their alcoholic stupor long enough to get a slew of hotmail addresses in order to be assholes Their vocabulary seems to me to be a little above the usual 14 year old. ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598/17 "2000-01-06T00:26:00Z")
I’m with Uncle B on this one, sir. Sign me up for the daily double. And no…not going for the trifecta. * * * “You are sweet, kind, and considerate… Like a grown up boy scout with tits!” - Brian, aka SDMB’s one and only Satan. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Corrado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a88e4f/32.png) [@John\_Corrado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Corrado)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598/18 "2000-01-06T00:32:00Z")
Lord Derfel- join away. Option G, huh? Hmm. Drunken frat-boys. Well, the terminology and techniques stated _do_ seem to be a bit above the regular SaDkOrNyGuY level; but the general attitude and idiocy seem to indicate maturity below even that of frat boys… I’ll give you equal odds on that one, 5:1. Any other takers? * * * JMCJ This could be YOUR sig line! For just five cents a post, JMCJ Enterprises will place YOUR sig line at the bottom of each message! ---
**Author:** ![Gr8Kat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gr8kat/32/18668_2.png) [@Gr8Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gr8Kat)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598/19 "2000-01-06T00:42:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Someone else? Yeah, someone else. Notice how suddenly you’ve laid off the maniacal rambling and threats? Someone else who isn’t quite as clever as the previous FORMERAGENT has taken over. Gr8 “Waitin’ for the big bucks to come rolling in” Kat * * * “I hope life isn’t a big joke, because I don’t get it,” Jack Handy [The Kat House](http://members.aol.com/gr8kat1/KatGen/home.htm) [Join the FSH Webring](http://members.aol.com/gr8kat1/KatGen/fshwebring.htm) ---
**Author:** ![Gr8Kat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gr8kat/32/18668_2.png) [@Gr8Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gr8Kat)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598/20 "2000-01-06T00:51:00Z")
MikeylikesIT sez: > [@](#): > > whats going on here? all the strings keep getting shut down? Mikey calls the threads “strings.” The Finder sez: > [@](#): > > Note that the strings are being closed and the last line of each is advising, caution. The Finder calls the threads “strings.” Call me paranoid, but is this a common mistake for newbies to make or is there a connection here? Gr8 “High Roller” Kat * * * “I hope life isn’t a big joke, because I don’t get it,” Jack Handy [The Kat House](http://members.aol.com/gr8kat1/KatGen/home.htm) [Join the FSH Webring](http://members.aol.com/gr8kat1/KatGen/fshwebring.htm) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-folks-its-the-second-coming/3598.md?page=2)