# Hey hauss, suck it up, chickenshit **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 14, 2004, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802 "2004-12-14T16:35:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 17
**Author:** ![treis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bc79bd/32.png) [@treis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/treis)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2004, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802/321 "2004-12-15T23:56:08Z")
> [@yosemite](#): > > It’s often easy for him to know if he’s a daddy. Simply keep track of the women he screws. If she starts getting a big belly, that’s a tip-off. If he doesn’t give a shit about her and goes on his merry way, it’s really his own damned fault if he’s unaware that she’s in the family way. > > No, it’s not a perfect plan, because she can move to the Bahamas right after she discovers she’s pregnant. But _most_ of the time, this time-honored system works quite well. I don’t see what the big fucking deal about requiring the hospital to make an effort to find the father of a child. A few phone calls, check with the IRS or whatever. I am not asking anyone to move heaven and earth just make a decent effor to find that person. Its in the best interest of the child to have an active father in its life. I would hate to find out 15 years after a kid of mine was born. Think of all the memories and experience that a father would miss in these years. If that isn’t reason enough we should be finding these guys anyway to make them pay for child support. ---
**Author:** ![catsix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@catsix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catsix)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2004, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802/322 "2004-12-15T23:56:59Z")
> [@](#): > > **Giraffe** said: > Hey, wring said we’d get eight pages with just catsix’s loony-ass ramblings. Wow, disagreeing with you makes me a ‘loony-ass’? I’m far from the only person in the world who thinks it sucks that men have no after-the-fact choice in parenthood but women do. Why am I the ‘loony-ass’? Is it because you’re having fun with your little friends? ---
**Author:** ![treis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bc79bd/32.png) [@treis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/treis)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2004, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802/323 "2004-12-15T23:57:13Z")
> [@Giraffe](#): > > Hey, **wring** said we’d get eight pages with just **catsix** ’s loony-ass ramblings. Add in **treis** and **Diogenes** competing for to see who can have the stupidest hypothetical situation, and the sky’s the limit. What exactly is stupid about my hypotheticals? ---
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802/324 "2004-12-16T00:01:03Z")
the case referred to earlier about the father who hadn’t known about the adoption of the baby gaining custody is about [Baby Jessica](http://www.midtod.com/bestof/babyjess.phtml) renamed “Anna” ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802/325 "2004-12-16T00:02:35Z")
I haven’t even _posed_ any hypotheticals. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802/326 "2004-12-16T00:03:47Z")
> [@treis](#): > > Diogenes- > > You never really answered why a man doesn’t deserve to know he has a child nor why we shouldn’t make an attempt to inform him. It’s up to him to keep track of his own sperm. ---
**Author:** ![Mtgman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5a626/32.png) [@Mtgman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mtgman)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802/327 "2004-12-16T00:05:13Z")
> [@catsix](#): > > Wow, disagreeing with you makes me a ‘loony-ass’? I’m far from the only person in the world who thinks it sucks that men have no after-the-fact choice in parenthood but women do. Lots of people think it sucks, that’s true. Lots of people are not claiming the problem is some sort of issue with the laws and that it can be fixed by legislation. Most recognize if as a side effect of biology. You, however, continue to say this is a legal inequity versus a biological inequity. The law is equitable. It is life which is inequitable. Attempting to correct inequities of biology by manipulating law is generally a bad idea because no matter what end state you wind up in after monkeying around with the law, someone is still screwed. Enjoy, Steven ---
**Author:** ![sugaree](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cc9497/32.png) [@sugaree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sugaree)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802/328 "2004-12-16T00:05:17Z")
> [@catsix](#): > > Wow, disagreeing with you makes me a ‘loony-ass’? I’m far from the only person in the world who thinks it sucks that men have no after-the-fact choice in parenthood but women do. Why am I the ‘loony-ass’? I wouldn’t ever call a fellow Pittsburgher loony-ass, but your entire thesis is not true. Men do have after-the-fact choices in parenthood. The playing field isn’t quite level yet, but it’s getting there. And all this energy spent plotting out ways to escape parenthood would be better spent plotting out ways to help families work. ---
**Author:** ![treis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bc79bd/32.png) [@treis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/treis)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802/329 "2004-12-16T00:05:20Z")
You keep saying that but it is an unreasonable expectation. What do you have against a father knowing he has a child and a child knowing his father? ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802/330 "2004-12-16T00:05:45Z")
> [@treis](#): > > I don’t see what the big fucking deal about requiring the hospital to make an effort to find the father of a child. A few phone calls, check with the IRS or whatever. I am not asking anyone to move heaven and earth just make a decent effor to find that person. Its in the best interest of the child to have an active father in its life. I would hate to find out 15 years after a kid of mine was born. Think of all the memories and experience that a father would miss in these years. If that isn’t reason enough we should be finding these guys anyway to make them pay for child support. It’s a violation of doctor-patient confidentiality for a hospital to give out that information. ---
**Author:** ![yosemite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/3ab097/32.png) [@yosemite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yosemite)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802/331 "2004-12-16T00:07:22Z")
> [@treis](#): > > I don’t see what the big fucking deal about requiring the hospital to make an effort to find the father of a child. They can’t find out anything unless the mother tells them. And as you know, a baby can’t be adopted unless the father (if named) gives permission. I don’t know what else you want the hospitals to do. Tell the father before the mother can do so? Maybe he’s a psycho. Maybe she wants to break the news to him herself. Whatever. I don’t think it’s the hospital’s job to interfere in such a thing. And just so it’s clear, yes, in most cases, I think the mother is _morally obligated_ to tell the guy that he’s got a kid. This issue is one that is actually close to my heart, actually, since this situation could have happened to someone close to me. I think that unless the father is a scumbag or unstable or something, it’s pretty _shitty_ for a woman to not tell him that he’s a father. Pretty shitty indeed. And in preview: thanks for the cite, **wring**. > [@catsix](#): > > Wow, disagreeing with you makes me a ‘loony-ass’? I’m far from the only person in the world who thinks it sucks that men have no after-the-fact choice in parenthood but women do. Why am I the ‘loony-ass’? You’ve had a long, rich history of extending threads (as **wring** has already pointed out). More than a few of us have noticed this. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802/332 "2004-12-16T00:08:24Z")
> [@treis](#): > > You keep saying that but it is an unreasonable expectation. What do you have against a father knowing he has a child and a child knowing his father? All the father has to do is keep track of the women he fucks. ---
**Author:** ![treis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bc79bd/32.png) [@treis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/treis)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802/333 "2004-12-16T00:08:40Z")
There is no need to give any information about the mothers medical condition. Just tell the father that he has a kid. ---
**Author:** ![Greathouse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/greathouse/32/2992_2.png) [@Greathouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greathouse)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802/334 "2004-12-16T00:10:53Z")
> [@yosemite](#): > > It’s often easy for him to know if he’s a daddy. Simply keep track of the women he screws. If she starts getting a big belly, that’s a tip-off. If he doesn’t give a shit about her and goes on his merry way, it’s really his own damned fault if he’s unaware that she’s in the family way. > > No, it’s not a perfect plan, because she can move to the Bahamas right after she discovers she’s pregnant. But _most_ of the time, this time-honored system works quite well. So you’re saying that if a man fucks some chick and doesn’t keep in touch with her then he should forfeiting his rights as a father? ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802/335 "2004-12-16T00:10:57Z")
> [@treis](#): > > There is no need to give any information about the mothers medical condition. Just tell the father that he has a kid. Even saying that a woman has had a baby is a violation unless the woman give permission. the father is also none of the hospital’s fucking business. Their job is to privide medical care and that’s it. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802/336 "2004-12-16T00:12:02Z")
> [@Greathouse](#): > > So you’re saying that if a man fucks some chick and doesn’t keep in touch with her then he should forfeiting his rights as a father? He can assert his rights at any time. ---
**Author:** ![treis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bc79bd/32.png) [@treis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/treis)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802/337 "2004-12-16T00:13:27Z")
Diogenes- Ignore the legal aspect for a second. Morally/Ethically why shouldn’t a father be informed that his child was born? ---
**Author:** ![yosemite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/3ab097/32.png) [@yosemite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yosemite)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802/338 "2004-12-16T00:14:39Z")
> [@Greathouse](#): > > So you’re saying that if a man fucks some chick and doesn’t keep in touch with her then he should forfeiting his rights as a father? Read my post above. I think a woman is morally obligated to tell a guy that he’s a dad (unless he’s a nutcase or something). And no, I don’t think he’s _forfeiting_ his rights—his rights always exist. However, if he can’t keep track of all the women he screws, he might be kept out of the loop. If he wants to minimize the risk of that happening, he needs to stay in the loop. If drops all contact with her makes himself scarse, he shouldn’t expect that she’ll go to heroic efforts to track him down to tell him. ---
**Author:** ![catsix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@catsix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catsix)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802/339 "2004-12-16T00:15:25Z")
> [@](#): > > **yosemite** said: > You’ve had a long, rich history of extending threads (as wring has already pointed out). More than a few of us have noticed this. What the fuck are you talking about? I expressed an opinion on page 1 that is controversial but nevertheless my actual, real opinion. I am making no intentional effort to ‘extend’ any thread. If expressing my honest opinion in the Pit is a problem, perhaps the **mods** should say so. Until then, you’re off your rocker for suggesting that it’s solely my fault threads get long. As for ‘more than few of you’, well, I guess that’d be your gang of ‘if catsix said it, she’s a loon.’ Especially since nobody in this thread can accuse me of ‘misunderstanding’ the other side or ‘reading things that aren’t there.’ You might as well go ahead and blame **Diogenes** and yourself for this thread being as long as it is. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802/340 "2004-12-16T00:17:51Z")
> [@catsix](#): > > Wow, disagreeing with you makes me a ‘loony-ass’? I’m far from the only person in the world who thinks it sucks that men have no after-the-fact choice in parenthood but women do. Why am I the ‘loony-ass’? I don’t think your contributions to this thread are loony-ass because I disagree with them. I think they’re loony-ass because they’re, well, stupid and illogical and often incoherent. Both you and **treis** have been frothing over the Baby Safe Haven program for most of this thread. Helpful tip: the existence and/or injustice of this program has nothing to do with 99.9999% of child support cases and thus irrelevant to the topic of child support. Using it as justification for why the current child support system is grossly unfair is, in a word, stupid. Going on and on and on about it is, in two words, really irritating. > [@](#): > > Is it because you’re having fun with your little friends? What little friends? I hate **wring** like poison and **yosemite** smells like expired lunch meat. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802.md?page=16) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-hauss-suck-it-up-chickenshit/279802.md?page=18)