# Hey, Melissa Harris-Parry - you're wrong, you're stupid, you're ugly (on the inside). **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 1, 2014, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607 "2014-01-01T01:18:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![Blackberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@Blackberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackberry)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2014, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607/181 "2014-01-04T22:03:01Z")
> [@Amateur\_Barbarian](#): > > No one else seems to have caught the one true oddity in this picture. Maybe it means something, maybe it doesn’t… but “one thing is not like the others” in an intriguing way. > > All of the boys including MItt are wearing blue shirts, most of them an identical fine check. All of the girls are wearing pink/peach outfits, including Ann and the other baby. > > The baby in question, a boy, is wearing peach/pink. Huh. No, I thought the same thing, but then I realized I didn’t know if the other babies were boys or girls and I looked it up and some of them are indeed boys too. ETA: Looking again, I guess the toddler boys who look just a little bit older are wearing blue. But I think one of those other peach/pink babies is a boy too. I don’t know. Who can keep up with them all? Mitt can’t, I know that (he said on his Twitter than both of the last two babies were his “22nd grandchild” or something). > [@JRDelirious](#): > > However… ^ _That_ I could along with, but… ^ _this_ seems gratuituously hostile. Well it is the pit 🆒 You asshole. But I do think it’s appropriate to be hostile about the Romneys. ---
**Author:** ![Tee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/73ab20/32.png) [@Tee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tee)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2014, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607/182 "2014-01-05T01:03:22Z")
> [@JRDelirious](#): > > Clarify: Are you saying that when you wrote > (my underlining) > …you were NOT saying you thought _“Kieran doesn’t exist as a word anywhere”_? > > Because that’s a different thing than proposing, as you seem to then do immediately after that, that the problem is “Kieran” = “black” is a wrong reading of the meaning. \*That \*could be an argument. There’s a serviceable word for black in Gaelic (_dubh_) and Kieran is not Gaelic; it’s an English coinage of the name of a Catholic saint (or two), which might have sprung from “dark” or “black” depending on who you ask. Black makes little sense to me in this context but that’s a matter for debate – the writer’s, not mine. I think he’s dead wrong. The name, itself, I meant exists as a name only, a word as much as Kayla, Kingston, and Keyshawn are words, and not at all like how Crystal, Hunter, Ridge, Lane, and Abigail are words. If there is an appreciable difference, I’ll leave it up to you to articulate it. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2014, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607/183 "2014-01-05T01:37:16Z")
> [@Tee](#): > > There’s a serviceable word for black in Gaelic (_dubh_) and Kieran is not Gaelic; **it’s an English coinage of the name of a Catholic saint (or two), which might have sprung from “dark” or “black” depending on who you ask**. Black makes little sense to me in this context but that’s a matter for debate – the writer’s, not mine. I think he’s dead wrong. The wiki article seems to contradict you about the origin of the word: [ > [@](#): > > Ciarán (Irish) or Ciaran (Scottish) is a Gaelic male given name meaning “little dark one” or “blacky”, **produced by appending a diminutive suffix to ciar (“black”, “dark”)**. The female form is Ciara. ]([Ciarán - Wikipedia](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ciar%C3%A1n)) I won’t outright label it racist, but it seems somehow wrong for ANY white family to name their adopted black baby “Darkie”. I mean, is that sound bite gonna win any elections: > [@Hypothetical Candidate Romney](#): > > He’s great isn’t he? Yep, that’s our Darkie! ETA: Okay, maybe if they also name one of their white kids “Whitey”, it would be kinda cool. ---
**Author:** ![boytyperanma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4491bb/32.png) [@boytyperanma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boytyperanma)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2014, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607/184 "2014-01-05T01:47:40Z")
> [@Blackberry](#): > > Who can keep up with them all? Mitt can’t, I know that (he said on his Twitter than both of the last two babies were his “22nd grandchild” or something). Great are you saying he has to keep binders full of babies too? ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2014, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607/185 "2014-01-05T02:51:57Z")
> [@boytyperanma](#): > > Great are you saying he has to keep binders full of babies too? Well, if so couldn’t blame him, _I would_ if I had that many grandkids. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2014, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607/186 "2014-01-05T20:59:51Z")
> [@lance\_strongarm](#): > > “Different levels of wrong” > > Come on. > > (Are you going to use that one with my murder question you haven’t touched yet?) You can’t be this stupid, right? See, I just called you stupid, indirectly. That’s not as wrong if I’d murdered you, right? Of course there are degrees of wrongness. And it just so happens that racism towards people who have actually been oppressed for their race is more wrong than racism towards people who haven’t. This isn’t some odd position, but the position of most people. Apparently not everyone is as enlightened about race as you are. ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2014, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607/187 "2014-01-05T21:10:07Z")
If it matters to anyone, on [Fox News Sunday](http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2014/01/05/romney-accepts-apology-from-msnbc-about-grandson-says-no-ill-will/), Mitt Romney said that he accepts Melissa Harris-Perry’s apology. He [said](http://www.foxnews.com/on-air/fox-news-sunday-chris-wallace/2014/01/05/mitt-romney-road-ahead-obamacare-olympic-security), “I recognize that people make mistakes. And the folks at MSNBC made a big mistake. And they’ve apologized for it. And that’s all can you ask for. I’m going to move on from that.” ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2014, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607/188 "2014-01-05T21:44:58Z")
> [@Tee](#): > > But it’s a couple of pages later now, and enough people have found the poor black kid in a rich white family amusing Do you mean “people” in this thread have found it amusing? I control-f’ed through the thread for “funny” and found only one person who found it funny versus many who didn’t. ---
**Author:** ![doorhinge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a5b964/32.png) [@doorhinge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/doorhinge)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2014, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607/189 "2014-01-05T22:22:33Z")
> [@Dewey\_Finn](#): > > If it matters to anyone, on [Fox News Sunday](http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2014/01/05/romney-accepts-apology-from-msnbc-about-grandson-says-no-ill-will/), Mitt Romney said that he accepts Melissa Harris-Perry’s apology. He [said](http://www.foxnews.com/on-air/fox-news-sunday-chris-wallace/2014/01/05/mitt-romney-road-ahead-obamacare-olympic-security), “I recognize that people make mistakes. And the folks at MSNBC made a big mistake. And they’ve apologized for it. And that’s all can you ask for. I’m going to move on from that.” I notice that Romney mentioned MSNBC but did not mention what’s-her-name. Maybe he doesn’t know who Melissa Harris-Perry is? Maybe he doesn’t care? Considering how low MSNBC’s ratings are, why should he? Life goes on regardless of what MSNBC’s entertaining personalities have to say. ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2014, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607/190 "2014-01-05T23:11:18Z")
He didn’t say her name but he _did_ mention her, “You know, I think her apology was clearly heartfelt. And we accept that.” ---
**Author:** ![lance\_strongarm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/87869e/32.png) [@lance\_strongarm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lance_strongarm)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2014, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607/191 "2014-01-06T14:37:23Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > I get your reasoning. You think everything exist in a vacuum. Context means nothing to you despite the majority of people in this thread telling you why that is wrong. Your ignorance is willful which is why I feel perfectly justified in calling you stupid. The very fact that you feel the need to call me stupid shows how badly you’ve failed. ---
**Author:** ![lance\_strongarm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/87869e/32.png) [@lance\_strongarm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lance_strongarm)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2014, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607/192 "2014-01-06T14:41:28Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > You can’t be this stupid, right? See, I just called you stupid, indirectly. That’s not as wrong if I’d murdered you, right? Sigh. Nice trick. You conflated one act with another. This is about racism, not murder or calling someone stupid. It is about the actor, not just the action. So you can’t compare two different acts. The acts are not the point, it’s the reasoning for justifying them. So in this case, you’d have to argue that a black man calling a white man stupid isn’t as bad as a white man calling a black man stupid. And that’s just crude racism. > [@](#): > > And it just so happens that racism towards people who have actually been oppressed for their race is more wrong than racism towards people who haven’t. That’s stupid. > [@](#): > > This isn’t some odd position, but the position of most people. Like hell it is. I dare you to try to support that claim. > [@](#): > > Apparently not everyone is as enlightened about race as you are. Hey, we agree! ---
**Author:** ![lance\_strongarm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/87869e/32.png) [@lance\_strongarm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lance_strongarm)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2014, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607/193 "2014-01-06T14:44:33Z")
> [@JRDelirious](#): > > True, but amidst the blowback from centuries of one-sided oppression and violence and a legacy of institutional discrimination (that yes, still exists), having to listen to mere verbal mockery from the aggrieved side should be the least of our problems. I agree. As I’ve explained before, my problem is with the general idea that any racism by blacks against whites is acceptable, not just a little verbal mockery or humor. The conversation moved beyond the incident that started this thread. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2014, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607/194 "2014-01-06T15:17:53Z")
> [@lance\_strongarm](#): > > The very fact that you feel the need to call me stupid shows how badly you’ve failed. Yep. Definitely isn’t needed. ---
**Author:** ![lance\_strongarm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/87869e/32.png) [@lance\_strongarm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lance_strongarm)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2014, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607/195 "2014-01-06T15:25:53Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > Yep. Definitely isn’t needed. Ah, add yourself to the failure list. ---
**Author:** ![zweisamkeit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zweisamkeit/32/4360_2.png) [@zweisamkeit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zweisamkeit)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2014, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607/196 "2014-01-06T16:20:16Z")
**lance** , I’d like to discuss this a bit with you so you could perhaps understand why your position is considered problematic. But I want to make sure you see my intent right off the bat is not to be snarky and hostile (even if I can be since it’s the Pit 😉 ). I believe your heart is in the right place and it can be really bizarre and hurtful when someone comes in and aggressively gets on your case for something you see as clearly a good opinion/position. It can feel like you’re not just defending your point but _yourself_ as well. It’s kinda hard to honestly listen to a different point of view all calmly and logically after they called you stupid. So, would it be cool to start this conversation over again, you and me, without any underlying aggression? I’d like to ask some questions to start and want to assure you there’s no trap for the “wrong” answer – I just want to make sure I understand parts of where you’re coming from and thus hopefully present my points in a clearer way. ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2014, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607/197 "2014-01-06T16:23:27Z")
> [@doorhinge](#): > > I notice that Romney mentioned MSNBC but did not mention what’s-her-name. Maybe he doesn’t know who Melissa Harris-Perry is? Maybe he doesn’t care? Considering how low MSNBC’s ratings are, why should he? Life goes on regardless of what MSNBC’s entertaining personalities have to say. Seems to me Romney didn’t need to mention the Harris-Perry’s name because her name was just mentioned. Pronouns aren’t exactly an unknown concept in the English language. MSNBC has entertaining personalities? ---
**Author:** ![lance\_strongarm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/87869e/32.png) [@lance\_strongarm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lance_strongarm)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2014, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607/198 "2014-01-06T16:26:45Z")
> [@zweisamkeit](#): > > **lance** , I’d like to discuss this a bit with you so you could perhaps understand why your position is considered problematic. But I want to make sure you see my intent right off the bat is not to be snarky and hostile (even if I can be since it’s the Pit 😉 ). > > I believe your heart is in the right place and it can be really bizarre and hurtful when someone comes in and aggressively gets on your case for something you see as clearly a good opinion/position. It can feel like you’re not just defending your point but _yourself_ as well. It’s kinda hard to honestly listen to a different point of view all calmly and logically after they called you stupid. > > So, would it be cool to start this conversation over again, you and me, without any underlying aggression? I’d like to ask some questions to start and want to assure you there’s no trap for the “wrong” answer – I just want to make sure I understand parts of where you’re coming from and thus hopefully present my points in a clearer way. Absolutely, I welcome that. I appreciate you starting out this way. Let’s make clear what I’m talking about: the proposition that blacks are justified in being racist against whites in any given situation, not just when it comes to humor. As I’ve said, humor is different. It’s much more complicated, and it’s often satirical in ways people don’t understand. So the conversation has moved beyond the incident in the OP. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2014, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607/199 "2014-01-06T16:35:26Z")
> [@lance\_strongarm](#): > > Ah, add yourself to the failure list. Cain get a place on that list? Because I think you’re a fucking moron, too. ---
**Author:** ![lance\_strongarm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/87869e/32.png) [@lance\_strongarm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lance_strongarm)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2014, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607/200 "2014-01-06T16:52:19Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > Cain get a place on that list? Because I think you’re a fucking moron, too. Sure, you’re on it too. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607.md?page=9) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-melissa-harris-parry-youre-wrong-youre-stupid-youre-ugly-on-the-inside/677607.md?page=11)