# Hi, I would like to tell you about Jesus Christ, the only way to God **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [June 8, 2017, 1:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429 "2017-06-08T13:08:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2017, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429/41 "2017-06-08T17:21:12Z")
Je-sus? Never heard of him. Can you explain more about this Jesus? ---
**Author:** ![Whack-a-Mole](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/whack-a-mole/32/141_2.png) [@Whack-a-Mole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Whack-a-Mole)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2017, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429/42 "2017-06-08T17:22:20Z")
> [@CaptMurdock](#): > > Who _is_ this God person, anyway? Don’t forget Oolon Colluphid’s other books in his “trilogy of philosophical blockbusters”: - Where God Went Wrong - Some More of God’s Greatest Mistakes ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2017, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429/43 "2017-06-08T17:25:17Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > Excellent news. [James 1:5-8.](http://www.biblestudytools.com/james/passage/?q=james+1:5-8) “5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. 6 But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. 7 That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. 8 **Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do.** ”(bolding mine) Got the hint the first time, **Shodan**. ---
**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2017, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429/44 "2017-06-08T17:39:28Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > “5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. > 6 But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. > 7 That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. > 8 **Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do.** ”(bolding mine) > > Got the hint the first time, **Shodan**. On the upside I don’t lack enough wisdom to want to ask a sky fairy about it, so I guess I’m not double-minded and unstable! And perhaps due to having the screed deleted for them the remnants of the OP are perhaps the first time I’ve felt a unadulterated pity for a god-botherer. It must suck to have a belief system that fills you with desperation and suffering. ---
**Author:** ![outlierrn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/outlierrn/32/3005_2.png) [@outlierrn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/outlierrn)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2017, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429/45 "2017-06-08T18:04:50Z")
For in much wisdom is much grief, and he that increaseth knowledge also increaseth sorrow. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2017, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429/46 "2017-06-08T18:13:03Z")
My sister-in-law’s brother’s aunt’s uncle’s nephew’s niece saved 100,000 souls in her spare time by witnessing from home! [goo.gl/2S32hC](http://goo.gl/2S32hC) ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2017, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429/47 "2017-06-08T18:13:46Z")
A clean house is a sign of a misspent life. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2017, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429/48 "2017-06-08T18:16:23Z")
> [@CaptMurdock](#): > > Who _is_ this God person, anyway? > [@Whack-a-Mole](#): > > Don’t forget Oolon Colluphid’s other books in his “trilogy of philosophical blockbusters”: > > - Where God Went Wrong > - Some More of God’s Greatest Mistakes And his final book: - Well, That Just About Wraps It Up For God 😉 ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2017, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429/49 "2017-06-08T19:15:11Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > OP edited by mod. > > Now I have no idea what Jesus said and I’m probably going to hell. > > Thanks, **Bone**! Who is this Omnipotent One who can gaze upon the words of Jesus, and putting forth his hand upon the keyboard, he causeth the words to vanish from the Earth, yea, as though they never were? For verily, this is a fearsome power. So sayeth Job unto the Lord: “I know that You can do all things, And that no purpose of Yours can be thwarted.” – Job 42:2 ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2017, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429/50 "2017-06-08T19:16:28Z")
> [@Lemur866](#): > > Je-sus? Never heard of him. Can you explain more about this Jesus? [Why you keep calling me Jésus? I look Puerto Rican to you? Guy back there called you Jésus. He didn’t say Jésus. He said, “Hey, Zeus!” My name is Zeus. Zeus? Yeah, Zeus! As in, father of Apollo? Mt. Olympus? Don’t fuck with me or I’ll shove a lightning bolt up your ass? Zeus! You got a problem with that? No, I don’t have a problem with that.]([https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BquyQj8TX\_w](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BquyQj8TX_w)) ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2017, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429/51 "2017-06-08T19:23:45Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Who is this Jesus guy? Why haven’t I ever heard about him before? Does he have a blog or something? He was one of the [Alou brothers](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alou_family), baseball stars ~50 years back. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2017, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429/52 "2017-06-08T19:53:28Z")
> [@BeepKillBeep](#): > > You asked to volunteer at the church and they couldn’t immediately suggest something for you to do? That has to be a first. I know a lot of people who have asked to volunteer at their church, there was never a shortage of activities to which they could contribute. Like your pastor didn’t say “Go down to the soup kitchen and serve meals.” or “Go to a senior’s home and spend time with elderly who are lonely” or any of the number of charitable activities your community could almost certainly use? I’d suggest finding a better pastor/church. To be fair to her pastor, he may have made those suggestions. And the OP may have said, “No, I was looking for a ministry from God that requires as little effort as possible. You got anything I can do in around five minutes while sitting in a chair in my own home?” ---
**Author:** ![Buck\_Godot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/buck_godot/32/6573_2.png) [@Buck\_Godot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Buck_Godot)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2017, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429/53 "2017-06-08T20:04:37Z")
Anyone willing to give odds that the OP was the first and last we hear of this poster. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2017, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429/54 "2017-06-08T20:11:01Z")
> [@Buck\_Godot](#): > > Anyone willing to give odds that the OP was the first and last we hear of this poster. Last activity was the same time as the OP. Who knew actual witnessing would be so hard? ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2017, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429/55 "2017-06-08T20:13:09Z")
> [@Buck\_Godot](#): > > Anyone willing to give odds that the OP was the first and last we hear of this poster. I’ve been praying on it. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2017, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429/56 "2017-06-08T20:20:41Z")
> [@Buck\_Godot](#): > > Anyone willing to give odds that the OP was the first and last we hear of this poster. Og willing…? ~d&r~ ---
**Author:** ![txjim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f07891/32.png) [@txjim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/txjim)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2017, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429/57 "2017-06-08T20:20:45Z")
> [@](#): > > I don’t object to the concept of a deity, but I’m baffled by the notion of one that takes attendance. Amy Farrah Fowler ---
**Author:** ![somepumpkin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/7feea3/32.png) [@somepumpkin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/somepumpkin)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2017, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429/58 "2017-06-08T20:32:23Z")
> [@Buck\_Godot](#): > > Anyone willing to give odds that the OP was the first and last we hear of this poster. Yea, I kinda wanted to play along, but there’s no fish in this barrel. ---
**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2017, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429/59 "2017-06-08T20:57:44Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > To be fair to her pastor, he may have made those suggestions. And the OP may have said, “No, I was looking for a ministry from God that requires as little effort as possible. You got anything I can do in around five minutes while sitting in a chair in my own home?” To be fair, the OP explicitly said they were troubled about people going to hell. Helping people eat or live happy lives doesn’t keep them from going to hell; the only way to stop them from going to hell is to preach at them. I mean, preach really hard, to get past all that demon-worshiping they’re clearly doing. Helping at a soup kitchen doesn’t scratch that itch. Fire-and-forgetting some copy-pasted message apparently does - and by never returning they can imagine that the thread is full of everyone suddenly seeing the light and praising the lord and thanking the OP for extending the hand of salvation. I mean, in all seriousness, that must be what they expect to happen - otherwise why post it? ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2017, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429/60 "2017-06-08T20:58:17Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > So anyone who doesn’t accept Jesus Christ is going to hell? Jews, Muslims, atheists, agnostics? What about gay Christians? Or female pastors? Don’t forget about people that live in places where they simply have never heard of Jesus, Hellbound the lot of 'em. Praise the Lord! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-i-would-like-to-tell-you-about-jesus-christ-the-only-way-to-god/788429.md?page=4)