# Hi! I'm New, and I know you don't care! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 4, 2000, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550 "2000-10-04T00:15:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![jovius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/91b2a8/32.png) [@jovius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jovius)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550/1 "2000-10-04T00:15:51Z")
Hi! I’m New, and I know you don’t care! Oh BTW, you can blame RJK, who introduced me to S-Dope and some of the Doppers (mainly TechChik and others who went to this Las Vegas meet) and what they did here: nothing but good educational threads and Cecil’s attempts to rid the plague of general ignorance disorder. Anyways, you can read my bio (which is not much) and say “Hi!” to me and I’ll surely write back to you! Other than this, here I go read the other threads! Cheers, jovius Newbie to Straight Dope ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550/2 "2000-10-04T00:19:53Z")
Hi! (Scylla 1st to greet jovious) ---
**Author:** ![Padeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@Padeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Padeye)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550/3 "2000-10-04T00:19:56Z")
That’s where you’re _ **wrong** _! Oddly enough we show that we care in the same way that we show we don’t care. Go figure. Welcome to SDMB. ---
**Author:** ![Medea\_s\_Child](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8baadc/32.png) [@Medea\_s\_Child](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Medea_s_Child)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550/4 "2000-10-04T00:21:18Z")
We do care! _thwaps the newbie with a whipped cream covered pillow_ See, now that is love. Straight from the pillow fight thread. ---
**Author:** ![Jester](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jester/32/8223_2.png) [@Jester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jester)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550/5 "2000-10-04T00:24:12Z")
Hey hey hey, that’s no way to greet people! I, for one, definitely care that you’re here. New peoples is so GOOD! Welcome! ---
**Author:** ![racinchikki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@racinchikki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racinchikki)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550/6 "2000-10-04T00:30:05Z")
Hello, jovius, welcome to the SDMB! Not that I have any right to greet you, since I’m a newbie myself, but I DON’T CARE ABOUT THAT! Have fun be careful. This gets addictive. ---
**Author:** ![Gozu\_Tashoya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7993a0/32.png) [@Gozu\_Tashoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gozu_Tashoya)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550/7 "2000-10-04T00:33:13Z")
Yeah, it grows on you quickly. If you ever see a link to a page/pic that’s anywhere _near_ talk of gerbils, do NOT click on it. ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550/8 "2000-10-04T00:35:00Z")
Although I’m getting on a bit (cries of ‘get on with it, old-timer’), my students have passed on to me the secrets of communication with the young. It is my pleasure to welcome you with: Chill out, man. \* Don’t diss nobody. \*\* Right on. Feel the force. Buffy kicks ass. \*\*\* Give me five. Party on, Wayne. You have much to learn, Grasshopper. Alas ☹ I have no way of knowing which of these is suitable, but please make yourself at home. \*or woman (if appropriate), presumably. \*\*I’m not sure what dissing is, but isn’t there a double negative here? \*\*\* 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Skelji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b38774/32.png) [@Skelji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skelji)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550/9 "2000-10-04T00:52:44Z")
Welcome to our world, jovius. It is indeed a strange and addictive place. Don’t worry about Medea’s Child… :: squirts Reddi Wip in her hair :: …she is in the middle of a pillow fight. See? This place is fun. You’ll have fun, and you’ll be flirting before you know it. Uh, I’d stay out of the Pit for a while, though. Until you get your sea legs going. ---
**Author:** ![Geobabe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/geobabe/32/3908_2.png) [@Geobabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geobabe)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550/10 "2000-10-04T01:11:58Z")
Welcome, and don’t ask about “felching” or “squicking” unless you are _absolutely certain_ you want to know. ---
**Author:** ![Ringo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/779978/32.png) [@Ringo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ringo)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550/11 "2000-10-04T01:15:04Z")
Hi, **jovius**! Welcome aboard! Give my regards to **RJK**. Vegas _was_ fun! ---
**Author:** ![Ringo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/779978/32.png) [@Ringo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ringo)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550/12 "2000-10-04T01:21:39Z")
And I’ll add that’s a great Trudeau quote you’ve got in your profile. ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550/13 "2000-10-04T01:23:22Z")
Don’t ask about monging, either. You Don’t Want To Know. And to avoid the hell that has been previous newbies, Wally was a deeply-respected member of the board who died back in June. And welcome. ---
**Author:** ![hypergirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/49beb7/32.png) [@hypergirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hypergirl)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550/14 "2000-10-04T01:48:49Z")
Of course we care. New newbies make us old newbies look older. Plus the boards always need fresh meat because some people are inevitably scared away by felching and squicking. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550/15 "2000-10-04T01:58:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by hypergirl \* > \*\*New newbies make us old newbies look older. Plus the boards always need fresh meat because some people are inevitably scared away by felching and squicking. 😃 \*\* 1. I have no desire to look or be any older than I am now . . . on the board. 2. We need fresh meat. I’m hungry. haven’t had a good troll in a long time. 3. Hi ssskuggiii! ---
**Author:** ![DigitalMuse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecccb3/32.png) [@DigitalMuse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DigitalMuse)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550/16 "2000-10-04T02:06:07Z")
Hola jovious!! I’m still a newbie, and don’t worry we like you, since you’re one of us now!! P.S. Don’t ask about felching or squicking or monging until you’re established on the boards. It can be traumatizing to a newbie. I speak from experience. Enjoy the boards!! Hope to see you around!! ---
**Author:** ![Gunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gunslinger)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550/17 "2000-10-04T02:06:18Z")
Hi, New! ---
**Author:** ![wevets](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9a140/32.png) [@wevets](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wevets)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 2:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550/18 "2000-10-04T02:25:53Z")
Welcome, jovius! I hope you enjoy yourself here. We do care, the board’s enriched by new people, viewpoints, and experience. Post a bit to show us what we’re caring about and how much we care. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Bumbazine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bumbazine/32/362_2.png) [@Bumbazine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bumbazine)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550/19 "2000-10-04T02:33:43Z")
**We get profiles?** (frantically leafing through _newbie_ manual.) Jeez! So much to learn! From one newbie to another: Welcome Jovius. Just remember, when you’ve had a little too much of this curious place, to go here: [http://www.1112.net/lastpage.html](http://www.1112.net/lastpage.html) ---
**Author:** ![hypergirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/49beb7/32.png) [@hypergirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hypergirl)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550/20 "2000-10-04T02:42:52Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Gunslinger \* > \*\*Hi, New! \*\* Good god, was that stupid! (no offense) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-im-new-and-i-know-you-dont-care/35550.md?page=2)