# Hi! It's me! - Calling fellow phone-deafness sufferers. **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 15, 2006, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-its-me-calling-fellow-phone-deafness-sufferers/376562 "2006-10-15T20:09:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2006, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-its-me-calling-fellow-phone-deafness-sufferers/376562/21 "2006-10-17T21:31:07Z")
[QUOTE=Martha] Hi **gigi**! It’s me! [/QUOTE] Oh crap…um, hi! What’s up…? 😕 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2006, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-its-me-calling-fellow-phone-deafness-sufferers/376562/22 "2006-10-17T21:52:09Z")
[QUOTE=AHunter3] And forget about me recognizing coworkers out-of-context (e.g., in the supermarket aisle). By the 18th month, I’ll probably know your name and recognize you at work (although I may get you and another person you remind me of perpetually confused, don’t take it personal), but that recognition only works in conjunction with you being in an environment I expect to find you in. [/QUOTE] That’s about it with me, too. I don’t have problems with my family, or those I really know well. It’s the ones inbetween familiar and stranger, especially in a foreign (i.e., not typical) environment where the usual clues are not there. So I don’t think it’s pathological; it just takes me more feedback to associate a name with a face. ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2006, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-its-me-calling-fellow-phone-deafness-sufferers/376562/23 "2006-10-17T22:14:27Z")
[QUOTE=AHunter3] It also wreaks havoc on my ability to watch “thriller” movies. “Huh? What just happened? The guy who jumped out the window…is that the, umm, the girls’ boyfriend?” “What are you talking about? That’s the undercover policeman!” “Well what happened to the, umm, other guy, the one with the, umm, girlfriend?” “Are you talking about Peter, who was kissing Janet, or Thomas, who is with Ellen?” “Uhhhh…” [/QUOTE] That’s me at a lot of movies. Black-and-white ones are worse, because in color movies, I can tell myself something like, “Peter’s the one with brown hair, and Janet is the blonde”. Remembering which name goes with which face is much harder. Old movies, where all the men wear dark suits, are the worst. It’s mostly a problem with people I don’t see very often. If I’ve met someone once, I’m almost certainly not going to recognize them later. If I see you every day, I will recognize you. It’s a problem at events like family reunions, where I’m expected to recognize people who I see once a year (that takes years, if I ever manage it). ---
**Author:** ![Martha\_Medea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/43a26b/32.png) [@Martha\_Medea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martha_Medea)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2006, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-its-me-calling-fellow-phone-deafness-sufferers/376562/24 "2006-10-18T01:28:17Z")
Guys, the prosopagnosia support group meeting is down the hall. Phoniagnosia, anyone? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Push\_Up\_Bra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/edb3f5/32.png) [@Freudian\_Push\_Up\_Bra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Push_Up_Bra)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2006, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-its-me-calling-fellow-phone-deafness-sufferers/376562/25 "2006-10-18T04:43:45Z")
I’ve only ever failed to recognise a phone voice once. He spoke for about a minute before I said…“Um…who is this?” “Jeremy.” Right. Jeremy. My boyfriend of at least two months. Who I talk on the phone to at least twice a week. Oops. Sorry sweetie. I always check the caller ID on my cell now. Only three people I know have private numbers and two never call me. The third one is my boss. It’s okay. ---
**Author:** ![Martha\_Medea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/43a26b/32.png) [@Martha\_Medea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martha_Medea)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2006, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-its-me-calling-fellow-phone-deafness-sufferers/376562/26 "2006-10-18T18:30:14Z")
Guess we’ll be having those meetings in a phone booth then, and if the phone rings… “Hi, it’s me!” ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2006, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-its-me-calling-fellow-phone-deafness-sufferers/376562/27 "2006-10-18T18:56:50Z")
I have trouble recognizing phone voices, too. I’m just glad most of my friends and relatives who call my cell are in its phone book, so my phone knows who it is and tells me. On the home phone, it’s usually Mr. Neville’s family or someone I don’t need to care who it is (telemarketer, wrong number, etc). I’m not much of a phone talker- I’d much rather communicate by email in most cases. I’ve always thought my phone deafness was a subset of my tone deafness. Any other phone-deaf people also tone-deaf? ---
**Author:** ![Subway\_Prophet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecb155/32.png) [@Subway\_Prophet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Subway_Prophet)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2006, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-its-me-calling-fellow-phone-deafness-sufferers/376562/28 "2006-10-19T15:16:02Z")
I posted [this](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=384646) a while back, but no one responded, so I’m using it as my response to the OP. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![GillianBoardman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bc79bd/32.png) [@GillianBoardman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GillianBoardman)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2006, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-its-me-calling-fellow-phone-deafness-sufferers/376562/29 "2006-10-19T15:25:35Z")
I’d like to request a meeting place slightly larger than a phone booth. But at least I understand now why people get insulted when I don’t recognize them by phone voice. This is apparently much rarer than I ever imagined. ---
**Author:** ![Sal\_Ammoniac](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8dc957/32.png) [@Sal\_Ammoniac](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sal_Ammoniac)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2006, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-its-me-calling-fellow-phone-deafness-sufferers/376562/30 "2006-10-19T20:09:35Z")
I’m also not very good with voices on the phone. My hearing is not the acutest anyway, and I think that’s part of the problem. But in general I’m a phone-avoider, so I don’t get a ton of calls of the “Hi, it’s me!” variety. In fact, it’s fair to say that I rarely get phone calls at home (and not even so many at work). Usually when it rings I let my wife, or increasingly, my daughter answer. (And as a by-the-way, I find that having a kid answer the phone is a great way to deal with telemarketers.) ---
**Author:** ![Martha\_Medea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/43a26b/32.png) [@Martha\_Medea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martha_Medea)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2006, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-its-me-calling-fellow-phone-deafness-sufferers/376562/31 "2006-10-19T20:33:17Z")
[QUOTE=GillianBoardman] I’d like to request a meeting place slightly larger than a phone booth. But at least I understand now why people get insulted when I don’t recognize them by phone voice. This is apparently much rarer than I ever imagined. [/QUOTE] OK - **AskNott, gigi, Anne Neville, Gillian Boardman, Sal Ammoniac, Subway Prophet** … and at a push, **Nic2004** ’s dad - we might not qualify for public funding but we would need at least a park bench for our meetings. This thread confirmed my suspicion that it is quite a rare ailment, but I’m glad I’m not a complete one-off. The worst part is when I make a call, and try - against my better judgement - to guess who has picked up the phone, and I say “Hi, Jane?” when in fact _John_ was the one who answered. :o :smack: And that reminds me - caller ID doesn’t help much when the person calling could be one of any number of members of that household. ---
**Author:** ![Autumn\_Almanac](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d26b3c/32.png) [@Autumn\_Almanac](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autumn_Almanac)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2006, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-its-me-calling-fellow-phone-deafness-sufferers/376562/32 "2006-10-19T20:41:12Z")
[QUOTE=Martha] If you have a particularly distinctive voice, accent or are one of three or four members of my immediate family, I can just about identify your voice. [/QUOTE] That’s funny, because the only people I have phone voice recognition trouble with are my family members and my wife’s family members. Maybe it’s unique to our families, but everyone has really similar voices. Don’t know if this is related, but I try to avoid talking on the phone altogether because the lack of facial expressions and body language really throws me. It’s hard for me to get a handle on the conversation and I’ll find myself stumped trying to respond to even simple statements. My brain just shuts down. I never have that kind of trouble speaking face to face with people. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hi-its-me-calling-fellow-phone-deafness-sufferers/376562.md?page=1)