# Highlander sword choice **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 23, 2003, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092 "2003-05-23T19:50:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Baldwin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baldwin/32/7264_2.png) [@Baldwin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baldwin)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2003, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092/21 "2003-05-24T15:20:36Z")
There seemed to be rules that were simply convention and tradition, like not using firearms, and rules that really couldn’t be broken without dire consequences, like not fighting on hallowed ground. Tradition is a powerful force, and the vast majority of immortals seem to rely on hand-to-hand weapons. I don’t know why they don’t wear gorgets. Immortals also tend to try and keep their activities from attracting attention (although apparently the police in MacLeod’s town eventually just stopped even investigating headless bodies). They’ve mastered the art of somehow concealing lengthy unsheathed swords under trenchcoats, and sometimes seem to produce swords out of the air; quite a magic trick. But we’ll assume that for daily walking-around, a sword of three feet or so in length is about the limit. A katana is an amazing cutting instrument, but too brittle for prolonged Western-style swordplay (this may be an area where a modern, stainless spring steel blade might have an advantage over a 500-year-old blade created by a Japanese master). Claymores and European greatswords are not too heavy; they’re just right for their size and proper style of use; a good greatsword used with half-swording and other techniques should be very effective – but hard to conceal. I might consider a brandistock – a wooden staff with a blade that emerges from the end when it’s brandished, making for a servicable polearm. If concealment wasn’t an issue, I might go for a glaive or Japanese naginata. It puzzled me that none of the immortals apparently ever used a shield. If you can conceal a longsword under your clothing, you should be able to carry at least a buckler. They also don’t seem to mind going up with a single-handed saber against a two-handed sword; my experiments in the SCA indicate this makes for a really hard time for the saber guy, although victory is possible. Maybe I’ve spent too much time thinking about this. ---
**Author:** ![Odesio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/odesio/32/20003_2.png) [@Odesio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odesio)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2003, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092/22 "2003-05-24T18:53:56Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Miller \* > \*\* > Am I the only person who feels _Highlander II_ was basically a faithful sequel to a really stupid movie? \*\* Highlander is a pretty awful movie with the poor dialogue and cheese ball acting. \ That said I might just use an axe instead of a sword. What, you’re going to parry my axe with that sword of yours? Marc ---
**Author:** ![3trew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/3/13edae/32.png) [@3trew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/3trew)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2003, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092/23 "2003-05-24T19:49:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by MGibson \* > \*\*Highlander is a pretty awful movie with the poor dialogue and cheese ball acting. > > \*\* You watched it while you were sober, didn’t you? When will people ever learn… ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2003, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092/24 "2003-05-24T21:44:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Journeyman \* > Also, the argument is not that a chainsaw would be easy to parry. The argument is that it’s slow and bulky, and that a good swordsman would have you quite dead before you got a good swing at him. Yeah, but there’s only one sort of killing blow when fighting immortals, one that would be pretty easy to protect against. Besides, with centuries of accumulated wealth, how hard could it be to design and build with a lightweight “duelling” chainsaw? I’ve got an electric one that’s pretty compact and maneuvrable, although I’ve yet to have the opportunity to test it out in a fight. Needs a power cord, unfortunetly, which would be a serious drawback. > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by 2trew_ > You watched it while you were sober, didn’t you? When will people ever learn… I’ll have you know that I _never_ watch _anything_ sober. That movie was just plain bad. It starred Christopher Lambert, for the love of Pete! There _are_ actors in Scotland who aren’t Sean Connery, you know. Why they cast this cross-eyed Swiss loser as Scottish highlander is one of the great imponderables of the cinema. Still, wasn’t half as bad as casting him as a Chinese lightning god in _Mortal Kombat_. ---
**Author:** ![Kilt-wearin\_man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/82dd89/32.png) [@Kilt-wearin\_man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kilt-wearin_man)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2003, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092/25 "2003-05-24T22:51:20Z")
Y’see, my theory has always been that _Mortal Kombat_ was actually the sequel to _Highlander_ - that’s what happened to MacLeod after he claimed “the prize”. He became a Chinese lightning god. He certainly seemed to be practically seething with the Quickening… ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2003, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092/26 "2003-05-25T00:48:08Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Nightime \* > \*\*There was one evil immortal on the Highlander TV series who used multiple guns to take down his targets before beheading them. I think he had a sniper rifle and an uzi or something. \*\* Why not just detonate an atomic bomb in every city where you know another Immortal is dwelling? I’ll bet the force of the blast would be **more** than enough to separate their heads from their shoulders. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Eats\_Crayons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Eats\_Crayons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eats_Crayons)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2003, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092/27 "2003-05-25T02:32:49Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Sock Munkey \* > \*\*I always wondered why more of them didn’t wear mail under their clothes. \*\* 'Cause going through airport security is a bitch. Anyhoo… I’d just have some custom sword made and call it Crayon’s Carver. (I’d also mace the bastard and throw pointy things.) ---
**Author:** ![Nightime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Nightime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nightime)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2003, 7:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092/28 "2003-05-25T07:46:45Z")
I just remembered the immortal who cheated the most - Xavier St. Cloud. He had a squad of heavily armed mercenaries to shoot and incapacitate his opponents, so he could just walk up and take their head. ---
**Author:** ![Sock\_Munkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Sock\_Munkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sock_Munkey)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2003, 8:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092/29 "2003-05-25T08:12:16Z")
Katanas are seriously overrated. They are good swords but they are not “the ultimate sword” because there is no such thing. If I were one of these guys i would have a cane with a retractable cattle prod point in it. ZAP! Natrally I’d crank up the votage to leathal dosage so it would render my opponent dead long enough for me to lop off his head with one of those niftywire saws. ---
**Author:** ![SenorBeef](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senorbeef/32/2220_2.png) [@SenorBeef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SenorBeef)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2003, 9:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092/30 "2003-05-25T09:38:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Vlad Dracul \* > \*\*And I’d STILL wear a lot of Kevlar turtlenecks! 🙂 \*\* Nit: And you’d be dead. 🙂 Kevlar isn’t any good against edged weapons. ---
**Author:** ![Odesio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/odesio/32/20003_2.png) [@Odesio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odesio)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2003, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092/31 "2003-05-25T15:56:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SenorBeef \* > \*\*Nit: And you’d be dead. 🙂 > > Kevlar isn’t any good against edged weapons. \*\* I thought it wasn’t good against piercing weapons. Marc ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2003, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092/32 "2003-05-25T19:14:52Z")
> [@](#): > > I thought it wasn’t good against piercing weapons. What do you think a bulletproof vest is made of? And what do you think a bullet does? Kevlar would help some against slashing, but really you want something rigid to defend against a sword slash. So just wear any old turtleneck at all, with plate steel underneath it. ---
**Author:** ![Odesio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/odesio/32/20003_2.png) [@Odesio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odesio)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2003, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092/33 "2003-05-25T22:29:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Chronos \* > \*\*What do you think a bulletproof vest is made of? And what do you think a bullet does? \*\* \ I suppose this is a hijack. A bullet tends to mushroom widening the impact area which is why a vest can stop the bullet from penetrating. A knife on the other hand concentrates all its force in one tiny point which is why it can penetrate a vest so well. Marc ---
**Author:** ![Gunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gunslinger)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2003, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092/34 "2003-05-26T05:27:05Z")
On Kevlar: it’s cut-resistant – you can get gloves made of it, mostly used by police for searching pockets where they might happen upon a razor blade or somesuch. A knife point can get in between the fibers and force then apart, though, which is why it won’t protect you from stabbing. A bullet is big enough for the fabric to “catch”. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2003, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092/35 "2003-05-26T18:39:22Z")
Huh, you learn something new every day. But we’re agreed that steel would work better than kevlar for the purpose at hand, right? ---
**Author:** ![Short\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Short\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Short_Guy)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2003, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092/36 "2003-05-26T20:58:48Z")
[hijack] I’ve always wondered. In the Highlander universe, what happens to an immortal who loses an arm or a leg, or more importantly: is disemboweled in some way? Do the severed limbs grow back? Is the immortal cursed to live on without a digestive system? [/hijack] ---
**Author:** ![Baldwin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baldwin/32/7264_2.png) [@Baldwin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baldwin)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2003, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092/37 "2003-05-26T22:46:01Z")
As I recall, McLeod cut off Xavier St. Cloud’s arm, and next time we saw St. Cloud he had a prosthetic arm. But the show was inconsistent about that stuff; sometimes it seemed clear that an immortal would quickly heal from any gash or stab that didn’t take his head off, yet Callas (not sure about the spelling) had his voice permanently damaged after McLeod slashed his throat. ---
**Author:** ![Eats\_Crayons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Eats\_Crayons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eats_Crayons)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2003, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092/38 "2003-05-26T23:10:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Baldwin \* > \*\*As I recall, McLeod cut off Xavier St. Cloud’s arm, and next time we saw St. Cloud he had a prosthetic arm. But the show was inconsistent about that stuff; sometimes it seemed clear that an immortal would quickly heal from any gash or stab that didn’t take his head off, yet Callas (not sure about the spelling) had his voice permanently damaged after McLeod slashed his throat. \*\* In _Highlander III_ (and yes, I’m ashamed to admit I watched it), the bad guy is cut in half at the waist. He’s on a catwalk so he uses the railing to get back to get the top half back to the bottom half before either fell. Kalas had his vocal chords affected by Ducan’s slash, as did the Kurgan in the first movie who was slashed by Sean Connery(which is why he had the weird voice and safety pins holding the scar together as a sick joke). And so visiting fan sites several years ago, I read the following fan speculation: 1. Serious wounds to the neck would scar because that’s the one week spot. 2. Limbs chopped off would re-attach if you were able to retrieve the limb and hold it against the stump. ---
**Author:** ![Anal\_Scurvy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c57346/32.png) [@Anal\_Scurvy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anal_Scurvy)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 5:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092/39 "2003-05-27T05:36:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by FallenAngel \* > \*\* As with any other martial art, if you study one style only, even if you master it, any opponent who has studied the same style will know pretty well what your next move is, possibly before you do. \*\* This is idiotic. What have you studied, for how long, and under whom? ---
**Author:** ![Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19adc/32.png) [@Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2003, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092/40 "2003-05-27T12:39:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Miller \* > \*\*Besides, with centuries of accumulated wealth, how hard could it be to design and build with a lightweight “duelling” chainsaw? I’ve got an electric one that’s pretty compact and maneuvrable, although I’ve yet to have the opportunity to test it out in a fight. > \*\* The problem with a chainsaw is the gyroscopic effect caused by the spinning chain. That makes it pretty difficult to twist the sucker quickly-- in some directions the saw will spin faster than you want, while in others it will resist with more strength than you’d expect… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/highlander-sword-choice/177092.md?page=3)