# Hilarious and terrible mixed metaphors **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 22, 2012, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298 "2012-08-22T19:12:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/son_of_a_rich/32/5439_2.png) [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Son_of_a_Rich)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298/41 "2012-08-23T17:12:04Z")
Someone once said that insults “roll of him like a duck”. ---
**Author:** ![Baal\_Houtham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baal_houtham/32/13604_2.png) [@Baal\_Houtham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baal_Houtham)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298/42 "2012-08-23T17:40:59Z")
“Half a dozen of one, half a dozen of the other” makes perfect sense. “It’s a doggie dog world” is in my repertoire, because it’s just fun to say “doggie dog.” ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298/43 "2012-08-23T17:47:31Z")
> [@Baal\_Houtham](#): > > “Half a dozen of one, half a dozen of the other” makes perfect sense. “It’s a doggie dog world” is in my repertoire, because it’s just fun to say “doggie dog.” It’s a snoopy snoop world. I knew someone who would say “Six dozen of one, half of one another.” ---
**Author:** ![Bilbo1967](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@Bilbo1967](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bilbo1967)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298/44 "2012-08-23T17:49:28Z")
A senior manager at work, overly fond of business bullshit, exhorted us at a start of year kick-off meeting to, “Run towards the bullets, they might be being fired from the opportunity gun!” 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298/45 "2012-08-23T18:14:10Z")
That is so very wrong. > [@Mijin](#): > > Had a manager, who frequently used biz-speak metaphors, say “How do you eat an elephant? You start with the low-hanging fruit”. That’s a good way to get trampled. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298/46 "2012-08-23T21:30:57Z")
You’ve buttered your toast, now you can lie in it. > [@Tim\_R.Mortiss](#): > > Make like a tree and get out of here! (from Back to the Future) You sure you remembered that right? How about: Make like a tree and leave! Make like a shepherd and get the flock outta here! Make like a banana and split! Make like horse droppings and hit the road! > [@Oly](#): > > I once heard a lizard say “Time is fun when you’re having flies.” No, that was Kermit the Frog who said that, in The Muppet Movie. ---
**Author:** ![Balance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ccd318/32.png) [@Balance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balance)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298/47 "2012-08-24T01:32:25Z")
> [@Senegoid](#): > > You sure you remembered that right? How about: Make like a tree and leave! :dubious: That was sort of the point, no? **Tim** quoted it correctly. (Later, it resulted in the character slapping himself in the back of the head and saying, “It’s ‘_leave_’, you idiot! ‘Make like a tree, and leave.’ You sound like a damn fool when you say it wrong.”) ---
**Author:** ![goonhead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ebca7d/32.png) [@goonhead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/goonhead)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298/48 "2012-08-24T01:38:32Z")
I’m fond of saying things “stink to high hell” ---
**Author:** ![scootergirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e99b99/32.png) [@scootergirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scootergirl)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298/49 "2012-08-24T01:52:39Z")
Yes. Until I was corrected by a good friend who almost died laughing when she realized what I was saying…I would say – “Nip it in the **butt** ”… instead of “bud” of course. English is my second language and that is how I heard it. 😃 :smack: ---
**Author:** ![mengvs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f17d59/32.png) [@mengvs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mengvs)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298/50 "2012-08-24T02:01:31Z")
English is the third language of a friend of mine (her first and second being Danish and German, respectively), so she does this quite frequently. Her most recent one was “boiling it down to a fine art.” ---
**Author:** ![Peter\_Morris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peter_morris/32/359_2.png) [@Peter\_Morris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peter_Morris)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298/51 "2012-08-24T02:10:22Z")
You’re on very thin ice, and you’ll end up in hot water. ---
**Author:** ![kyogi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/51bf81/32.png) [@kyogi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kyogi)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298/52 "2012-08-24T02:23:00Z")
## Originally Posted by Senegoid You sure you remembered that right? How about: Make like a tree and leave! “Why don’t you make like a tree… and, get the fuck outta here!”– Boondock Saints ---
**Author:** ![SCAdian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scadian/32/3292_2.png) [@SCAdian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SCAdian)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298/53 "2012-08-24T05:30:30Z")
> [@njtt](#): > > :dubious: I never heard any of those. Now, “swears like a trooper,” that’s a thing. (You get bonus points, though, for not putting “trouper”.) More bonus points for not saying “he’s a real trooper.” ---
**Author:** ![ClintO](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b5ac83/32.png) [@ClintO](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ClintO)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 10:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298/54 "2012-08-24T10:24:54Z")
Mona Lisa was as happy as a clam when the world was flat as a pancake ---
**Author:** ![Locrian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/locrian/32/14146_2.png) [@Locrian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Locrian)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 11:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298/55 "2012-08-24T11:03:56Z")
> [@Colophon](#): > > \ > > And what about those numbskulls who say “You’ve got another thing coming” and “I could care less”? 🙂 > > \ HA! It is SOOO annoying to hear people say they could care less. I usually respond with something like, “So, you give to their charity?” I also wonder about “shits and giggles”. I love that phrase, but I hardly giggle when I shit, so… Maybe “shits and giggles” means “good stuff” or “cool”?? ---
**Author:** ![Napkin\_Sandwich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/8dc957/32.png) [@Napkin\_Sandwich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Napkin_Sandwich)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 11:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298/56 "2012-08-24T11:44:45Z")
Is the Queen a Catholic? I’ve had a few people say that to me. I respond with a blank stare and a mental countdown till they realise what they’ve said. ---
**Author:** ![diggerwam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/919ad9/32.png) [@diggerwam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/diggerwam)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298/57 "2012-08-24T13:42:31Z")
My boss used to say that numbers would bounce around like swiss cheese. He stopped maybe a year ago. Maybe someone shamed him into stopping. ---
**Author:** ![robert\_columbia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e79b87/32.png) [@robert\_columbia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robert_columbia)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298/58 "2012-08-24T13:58:12Z")
Remember kids, when a mixed metaphor sprouts up, it should be derailed. ---
**Author:** ![ecoaster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/85e7bf/32.png) [@ecoaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ecoaster)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298/59 "2012-08-24T14:06:11Z")
Take it for _ **granite** _. It actually sort of makes sense, the person who used it thought that it just meant that something is rock-solid, obvious or goes without saying. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298/60 "2012-08-24T14:27:07Z")
I had a dear friend who used to try and “testify” (in the Christian sense) at inappropriate times. He was a sweet, snaggle-toothed old thing, grew up in a one room shack on the Shenendoah river, and we’d forgive him just about anything. Besides, it was always a hoot, because he could never get straight the difference between “By the grace of God” and “But for the Grace of God” he used them interchangeably to hilarious effect. There were others that he used to mash up but I can’t think of any now. Too bad, he was like a walking Mad Lib. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hilarious-and-terrible-mixed-metaphors/632298.md?page=4)