# Hillarious Acts Of Childhood (a.k.a: make a homesick young lady laugh) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 28, 2001, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hillarious-acts-of-childhood-a-k-a-make-a-homesick-young-lady-laugh/63661 "2001-04-28T18:38:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 4\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Runadoc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Runadoc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Runadoc)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2001, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hillarious-acts-of-childhood-a-k-a-make-a-homesick-young-lady-laugh/63661/21 "2001-05-01T01:34:45Z")
My daughter was 3 at the time and had an obvious bladder infection, so when I spoke to the pediatrician, he was on his way to the hospital anyway and asked that I meet him in the ER with her. Upon arrival they asked me to get a urine sample, so we went in to the small washroom and made the attempt. I tried water on her wrists, taking off shoes and socks placing her feet on the cool floor. Nothing was working and we waited and waited. Finally she managed a few drops, and I caught it in the little spec bottle. After waiting so long I had to go, so I asked her to just wait a sec while mommy had a pee. She stood quietly while I finished up and we walked back to the desk. She still had not said a word, but waited until the doc, and all staff were within earshot to ask “mommy, how come yours has fur on it?” :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2001, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hillarious-acts-of-childhood-a-k-a-make-a-homesick-young-lady-laugh/63661/22 "2001-05-01T04:03:02Z")
A friend of mine told me a story about when his son was younger and was still learning how to talk. Grandma was visiting for a few days and apparently decided it was important to teach the youngster various courtesies such as “please” and “thank you” and “excuse me”. So she spend all week telling the boy what he should say in various situations and then reminding him when they arose. The family was sitting around the dinner table when the boy released a very loud fart. He, of course, was unconcerned and kept eating without interruption. But his grandmother looked at him and asked “what do you say when you do that?” He thought for a second and then answered “aaaaaahhhhhh.” ---
**Author:** ![shell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/46a35a/32.png) [@shell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shell)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2001, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hillarious-acts-of-childhood-a-k-a-make-a-homesick-young-lady-laugh/63661/23 "2001-05-01T04:47:50Z")
This happened tonight… I have twin daughters, age 11 (call them Thing One and Thing Two). As a was hugging Thing One goodnight I noticed that her head felt awfully hot. She said "yeah, I’m always hot, but my hands are always cold. Thing Two responded with “yeah, I know, hot body, cold heart”. That kid is just way too ahead of her time. ---
**Author:** ![Juniper200](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@Juniper200](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Juniper200)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2001, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hillarious-acts-of-childhood-a-k-a-make-a-homesick-young-lady-laugh/63661/24 "2001-05-01T04:59:11Z")
When my younger brother (now 17) was about 3, he discovered the art of joke-telling. The best one, which he made up himself and repeated for weeks on end, was as follows. Brother: What did the chair say to the table? Me: I don’t know, what? Brother: FOOTSTOOL!!! (_brother falls to floor, laughing hysterically, kicking feet, the works._) When he was 10 and we were on a long car trip together, the family ganged up on him to tell him about these fine comedy moments, which he didn’t remember. We told him the joke and how he had reacted _every single time_, and he was appropriately indignant, like every good pre-teen should be. We rode on in silence for perhaps five minutes, when he says: “You know, it is pretty funny when you think about it…” We laughed, but it wasn’t from a newfound appreciation of The Joke. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hillarious-acts-of-childhood-a-k-a-make-a-homesick-young-lady-laugh/63661.md?page=1)