I read in a local paper about a couple who moved to the countryside then complained about mooing cows waking them up in the morning.
When that happens to me I nip over the hedge and calm them down with duct tape.
The cows that is, not the couple complaining about them.
Ah-HA! So you freely admit that you are “The Phantom Cow Taper” that’s been terrorising the bovine inhabitants of these fair isles?
The prosecution rests m’lud.
Vaguely apropos of this thread, Yuvraj Singh hit six sixes off one over yesterday against England - only the fourth time it’s ever happened in first-class cricket. (If you can call Twenty20 “first class” that is. 
) He reached 50 in 12 balls.
Amazingly, it’s only two weeks since Yuvraj’s own bowling was hit for five sixes off one over, also against England. Payback indeed…
That’s strange, I never had a problem with noise when I lived on Platt Lane 
To be fair they didn’t actually succeed - Lintz Cricket Club appears to be still going. Don’t know if it is at the same ground!