# Ho-fucking-ho: Christmas Season mini-rants **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 29, 2010, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309 "2010-11-29T18:36:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2010, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/1 "2010-11-29T18:36:19Z")
Hey, that other thread is getting unwieldy, and I just know that the holiday season of love, peace and understanding is just pissing a lot of people right the fuck off. I’ll start off with Black Friday and Cyber Monday: Coincidental to the shopping season, my P&S camera crapped out on me, so I went looking for a new one. Research narrowed it down to a couple of good possibilities and I settled on the Canon S95. I started searching early last week and found that the lowest prices were at about $369. I figured I’d wait for the Black Friday sales, and sure enough there were ads for the camera at the Low Black Friday Price!! of only. . .$369. Okay. . .well, then let’s wait until Cyber Monday. Surely there will be deals online. Sure enough, ads pop up all over the place for the LOW CYBER MONDAY PRICE, ONE DAY ONLY!!! of. . .$369. So apparently the way this all works is that if it’s a quality item in high demand, you can just go fuck yourself. If it’s a piece of shit or something that stores overstocked at a huge discount, you get it at what amounts to a fake low price for something that will be heavily discounted in the inventory sales in January. That’s okay; I mean, that’s capitalism and consumer beware type shit. What I object to is pricing something as normal (or even higher, in some cases) and tagging it as a “sale” item. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2010, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/2 "2010-11-29T18:52:08Z")
It’s official. This hangover is never going away. ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2010, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/3 "2010-11-29T18:55:25Z")
> [@purplehorseshoe](#): > > It’s official. This hangover is never going away. They never really do, they just disappear for a few days. ---
**Author:** ![Sattua](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sattua/32/11906_2.png) [@Sattua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sattua)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2010, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/4 "2010-11-29T19:05:55Z")
Christmas radio really sucks. Also, my favorite online stores aren’t sending out coupons. Bastards. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2010, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/5 "2010-11-29T19:17:46Z")
> [@Morgenstern](#): > > They never really do, they just disappear for a few days. How right you are, my good friend. What is up with scratchy tags on shirts? Haven’t they figured out that screened on tags are the way to go? Why do some lines still manage to put the world’s coarsest material against their customers’ skin? I know, I know, 10 years ago wants its mini-rant back, but I was out this weekend wearing a new and fun shirt, when much of my enjoyment was irritated by this god-awful tag, so it’s fresh in my mind now. I ended up ripping it off in a bout of mini-rage. ---
**Author:** ![Lacunae\_Matata](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@Lacunae\_Matata](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lacunae_Matata)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2010, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/6 "2010-11-29T20:12:35Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > What is up with scratchy tags on shirts? Haven’t they figured out that screened on tags are the way to go? Why do some lines still manage to put the world’s coarsest material against their customers’ skin? I know, I know, 10 years ago wants its mini-rant back, but I was out this weekend wearing a new and fun shirt, when much of my enjoyment was irritated by this god-awful tag, so it’s fresh in my mind now. I ended up ripping it off in a bout of mini-rage. I think I ranted (or whined) about this when I was pregnant last winter, and had a really itchy skin condition: It seems like there’s some inverse correlation between the fabric of your shirt and the texture of the tag. I think I have a couple of 100% silk shirts with tags made of a wool and sandpaper blend! (Oh, and the itchier the tag, the more likely that it’s sewn into a seam and can’t be ripped out completely without ruining the garment…) ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2010, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/7 "2010-11-29T20:25:17Z")
And what’s the deal with airline food? I’ll be travelling over the holidays, so this is a matter of some concern. ---
**Author:** ![Doctor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Doctor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2010, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/8 "2010-11-29T21:43:21Z")
> [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > And what’s the deal with airline food? > I’ll be travelling over the holidays, so this is a matter of some concern. Better bring your own. If your airline is even offering food, they want you pay for it on the flight. I mean, come on, _ **nobody** _ would actually _ **pay** _ for airline food!! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2010, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/9 "2010-11-29T21:43:58Z")
And before you get on the airplane, they’re going to touch your testicles. ---
**Author:** ![Ostrya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/35a633/32.png) [@Ostrya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ostrya)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2010, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/10 "2010-11-29T21:46:53Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > And before you get on the airplane, they’re going to touch your **testicles**. And for not referring to them by any controversial slang term, I thank you Ma’am. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2010, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/11 "2010-11-29T22:50:22Z")
Well, actually, if they’re touching your testicles, not your scrotum, you have a SERIOUS lawsuit pending! ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2010, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/12 "2010-11-29T22:53:54Z")
Here’s an old standard refrain from every year’s Christmas mini-rants - Christmas music. I’m amazed anew every year at how much I hate it. I mentioned in the other thread that a co-worker was already playing Christmas music loudly for everyone to “enjoy” - and me with a washed iPod. I went shopping today for a brand new Sony MP3Man with 50 hours of battery life - hopefully I won’t hear another Christmas song until Christmas Day, the only day of the year that I’ll willingly listen to Christmas music. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2010, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/13 "2010-11-30T00:35:41Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > And before you get on the airplane, they’re going to touch your testicles. Aha: so there is an upside. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2010, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/14 "2010-11-30T01:42:58Z")
Mark Twain’s autobiography is sold out. That was my “go to” Christmas present this year! I thought I had it all figured out. Well, tough shit, folks. Unless [amazon.com](http://amazon.com) comes thru, you’re getting your goddam Christmas gift late. I had the perfect plan, and I’m not going to think of another one.!! ---
**Author:** ![sqweels](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f19dbf/32.png) [@sqweels](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sqweels)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2010, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/15 "2010-11-30T03:53:14Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > Aha: so there is an upside. Each passenger should get to _choose_ the gender of the TSA agent who feels you up. And no fatties. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2010, 10:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/16 "2010-11-30T10:16:54Z")
> [@Doctor](#): > > Better bring your own. If your airline is even offering food, they want you pay for it on the flight. > > I mean, come on, _ **nobody** _ would actually _ **pay** _ for airline food!! 😛 Make sure it’s not puréed, though, or security may toss it away. If it is puréed, remember to put it in containers of the right size (100ml, and I don’t remember how much in ounces) and then into the Magic Bag Of Inertization, which turns Dangerous Liquids into Harmless Objects. ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2010, 12:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/17 "2010-11-30T12:09:50Z")
> [@sqweels](#): > > Each passenger should get to _choose_ the gender of the TSA agent who feels you up. > > And no fatties. Can I also choose the specific TSA agent who feels me up? Because I’d like a 6’2" Nordic god to do my pat-down when I fly home today. ---
**Author:** ![Norse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/a9adbd/32.png) [@Norse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Norse)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2010, 12:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/18 "2010-11-30T12:47:07Z")
> [@MsRobyn](#): > > I’d like a 6’2" Nordic god to do my pat-down when I fly home today. Volunteering. (Okay, I’m not a god, and I’m not 6’2" (more like 5’8"), but one out of three’s a start, hm?) ---
**Author:** ![Acid\_Lamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Acid\_Lamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acid_Lamp)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2010, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/19 "2010-11-30T12:48:43Z")
It is too early for bell ringers to be out soliciting donations. Please to be waiting for December at least. Local radio stations: Playing christmas carols interspersed with the regular programming is driving me insane. Ipods and such are not an option here. You are really fucking up my groove when you follow Dark Side of the Moon with Rudolph. I am also tired of hearing about “The Season” Bah humbug. The only saving grace is that since our recent move from central to south Florida has placed us in among a far denser collection of Jewish folk, the holiday glurge has decreased noticeably. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2010, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/20 "2010-11-30T14:00:53Z")
I wish I had testicles so they could be felt up at the airport. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309.md?page=2)