# Ho-fucking-ho: Christmas Season mini-rants **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 29, 2010, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309 "2010-11-29T18:36:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![Lightray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lightray/32/391_2.png) [@Lightray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightray)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2010, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/121 "2010-12-09T17:33:01Z")
> [@pikey\_pete](#): > > I just wish they would quit putting up christmas decorations before Thanksgiving This year, the local lame-Christmas-music radio station started on the lame music _two weeks_ before Thanksgiving. LAST CHRISTMAS BY WHAM! IS NOT A CHRISTMASSY SONG YOU RADIO TOOLS ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2010, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/122 "2010-12-09T19:59:20Z")
Secret Santas are only worthwhile if they’re (a) absolutely opt-in and (b) performed in groups of close friends. The last one I did actually turned out well–I gave a handmade journal, and I got a Nerf revolver, a single sock (long story), and a sponsorship of a needy kid. ---
**Author:** ![Jaguars](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jaguars/32/5879_2.png) [@Jaguars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaguars)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2010, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/123 "2010-12-10T00:38:03Z")
I wish to pit my brain. After going to my new haircut place thats’s staffed by a bunch of middle eastern guys early this week, I’ve been wondering what the hell the flag hanging on the back wall was. A horizontal tricolour, green, white & red with a sun in the middle. Couldn’t find it in the middle east, SE asia or the americas and knew it wasn’t European. Finally an interesting question worthy of GQ. So I type up an OP asking about it and am preparing to press submit, when some unit in the brain wakes up, looks round frantically and pulls the spanner out of the works. I google Kurdistan. Dammit I could have thought of that three days ago. Also Related I pit those dopers that complain about simple google searches, causing me to actually reseach things and deprive me of interesting questions. ---
**Author:** ![anya\_marie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@anya\_marie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anya_marie)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2010, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/124 "2010-12-10T04:04:31Z")
I got that makeupkit four years ago, so it’s not that i am still angry about it, but i think it was ridiculous and it’s an excellent bad example. ---
**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2010, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/125 "2010-12-10T04:19:07Z")
> [@anya\_marie](#): > > I got that makeupkit four years ago, so it’s not that i am still angry about it, but i think it was ridiculous and it’s an excellent bad example. be happy, I am diabetic and my father-in-law and step-monster-in-laws know it [he is also diabetic and we have had a lot of discussions about it over the years] and almost every fucking year they send some form of fruit and candy :dubious::rolleyes: [the stepmonster-in-law I am pretty certain is in charge of shopping for the present and she hates my guts. Which is fine, I hate hers also. She started being nasty first and I am just passive - aggressive back at her. She is going to absolutely hate it if we move back to California.:D] ---
**Author:** ![sinjin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@sinjin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sinjin)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2010, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/126 "2010-12-10T04:21:28Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Fuck, My college is telling me that I have a course still to take to get my degree mailed to me. And, as you know, I’m agoraphobic to the degree that I don’t leave the house even with people. Sure, I might be able to get out, but my brain goes to mush when I do. So there goes Clepping out or even taking the course online (since they require the Final to be on campus)There’s no way I can graduate in time. And I was so looking forward to finally being a college graduate. > > The thing that bugs me most is that I took the flipping course. Yeah, I got a B instead of my usual A. But it seems they aren’t taking the credit. That’s just asinine. I hope they just made a mistake, or I can convince them that I did take the course, but I’m not holding my breath. > > Also, I hate that my heater cannot blow hot air. Sure, it’s warmer than the outside air, but it’s still cold enough to give me a chill. I hope you have resolved the college issue. If not, the college should be able to give you the final exam at your home proctored by someone of their choice (a grad student) or yours. I proctored exams for my neighbor while she was getting a degree from Kent. It’s not that big a deal. The heater thing is due to convective cooling. The heater air is warmer than outside and also warmer than the room you are in but it is probably cooler than you are by the time it reaches you (room temp is about 70 and you should be about 98). If you can, direct the vent so that it doesn’t blow directly on you. This will allow the furnace to heat the room without chilling you. I hope that makes sense. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![anya\_marie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@anya\_marie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anya_marie)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2010, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/127 "2010-12-10T04:24:17Z")
I hope you get her the tackiest shit from whatever dollar store nearest to you. What’s all this noise about the “War on Christmas?” How can there be a war declared on Christmas when the sales and ads for it start in September before i’ve bought my motherfucking Hallloween candy? ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2010, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/128 "2010-12-10T04:32:31Z")
> [@Isamu](#): > > I keep them too. I always want to remember who I’ve been inspected by. 🙂 #9 is my fave. We have a Facebook relationship and everything… ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2010, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/129 "2010-12-10T14:09:21Z")
> [@cwthree](#): > > I ordered [these cards](http://ffrf.org/shop/solstice-cards/tis-the-season-.-.-/) and [these cards](http://ffrf.org/shop/solstice-cards/solstice-home-scene/) from the [Freedom From Religion Foundation](http://ffrf.org/). No religious message, but no anti-religious message either. Both cards are illustrated with a tasteful, simple line drawing appropriate to the meterological season. > > I have to admit, I really like the snowman/carrot/schlong idea, though. > > ETA: Pictures aren’t showing up on FFRF’s sales page. If you’re interested, PM me and I’ll scan mine for you so you can see what they look like. I like those. Alot. The artwork is very nice. Too bad I haven’t sent cards in 10 years. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2010, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/130 "2010-12-10T17:55:12Z")
So … ? You like the cards, you wanna send some out, so send 'em out. What you did or didn’t do last year or nine years ago is irrelevant. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2010, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/131 "2010-12-10T18:35:39Z")
There’s a War on Christmas? I’m basically a Pacifist, but sign me up! Finally, a cause I can get behind! ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2010, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/132 "2010-12-10T18:44:25Z")
> [@Ferret\_Herder](#): > > Nah, I’m sure their managers Had A Talk with them on this. I just wish that the main office had sent out big official “no Groupons with gift bag special, sorry” signs so they could be posted on the doors and at the checkout, to help take some of the heat off them. The angry lady ahead of me harangued the clerk into calling a manager to double-check, because the wording did say “no exceptions” after all, and even wanted to grab the phone to talk to management.. I don’t think a Memo from the head office can over-rule the wording of a coupon. Seems to be false advertising, I’d look into filing a complaint, but first write the Letter From Hell to Management. **kaylasdad99** - no, not ice, but cold water. Aloe is also OK for minor burns. **Kyla** Look at it this way- if they trashcan your resume becuase of a minor typo, you don’t want to be working for them anyway. **Imago** Christmas is most a secular holiday anyway, what with Frosty, Yule, Santa and what-not. **Freddy the Pig** Huh? Finding generic secular Frosty, Santa and even Seasons Greetings cards is a snap, they are everywhere. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![NinjaChick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/71c47a/32.png) [@NinjaChick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinjaChick)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2010, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/133 "2010-12-10T19:31:25Z")
Even though it’s on-the-clock time, I would rather claw my eyes out than participate in my boss’s retarded “holiday party”. I don’t want to eat your disgusting vegan baked goods, I don’t participate in gift exchanges or “Yankee swaps” (whatever the fuck that’s supposed to be). Also _I don’t celebrate Christmas_. No, not even in a secular fashion (Gee, let’s celebrate the birth of the [alleged] messiah! In a secular fashion!). I don’t do gift exchanges or Christmas music or Christmas cookies or Christmas parties. I do not do Christmas cheer. I do “visit with my relatives because otherwise my parents get impossibly bitchy” and I do “and everyone else can fuck off and celebrate your own fucking holiday and leave me alone and no one in the _world_ has ever actually enjoyed those fucking gift swaps and also _no one likes gingerbread_.” Oh, also, speaking of my parents: “Please don’t get me anything for Christmas, since as you know, at the end of January, I will be putting everything I own in storage and bouncing around the country a bit” means _don’t fucking buy me anything_. I’m an adult; if there’s something I want I’ll fucking buy it for myself. I’ve said a million times - you all want to exchange gifts? Fine, but once more _leave me out of it_. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2010, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/134 "2010-12-10T19:34:36Z")
I love gingerbread. And fruitcake. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2010, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/135 "2010-12-10T19:38:42Z")
I love gingerbread. I also love fruitcake - I’ve been holding back from buying one at Safeway after reading the calories (I’ll buy one, just not yet). Mmmm, dark, fruity, nutty fruitcake. ETA: HA! Awesome simulpost! ---
**Author:** ![MsWhatsit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb8c5e/32.png) [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2010, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/136 "2010-12-10T19:39:53Z")
I also like gingerbread. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2010, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/137 "2010-12-10T19:43:10Z")
> [@MsWhatsit](#): > > I also like gingerbread. What’s your stand on fruitcake? ---
**Author:** ![flodnak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/838e76/32.png) [@flodnak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flodnak)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2010, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/138 "2010-12-10T19:43:45Z")
> [@anya\_marie](#): > > What’s all this noise about the “War on Christmas?” How can there be a war declared on Christmas when the sales and ads for it start in September before i’ve bought my motherfucking Hallloween candy? People used to complain that Christmas Is Too Commercialized; now they are complaining that The Commercials Are Insufficiently Christmasized. Humans are strange creatures. My rant: Did some Christmas shopping today. The most frustrating part was getting out of the freaking mall parking garage to get home. There seems to be an unwritten rule that the people driving the wrong way, against the marked traffic patterns, will also be a) driving the widest vehicles AND b) in the middle of the goddamned lane. ---
**Author:** ![MsWhatsit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb8c5e/32.png) [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2010, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/139 "2010-12-10T19:45:20Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > What’s your stand on fruitcake? Unknown. I have never actually had any. The rum-soaked kind sounds pretty good, though. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2010, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309/140 "2010-12-10T20:08:36Z")
> [@NinjaChick](#): > > don’t participate in gift exchanges or “Yankee swaps” (whatever the fuck that’s supposed to be). > > …and no one in the _world_ has ever actually enjoyed those fucking gift swaps and also _no one likes gingerbread_." > > . > **[White elephant gift exchange](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_elephant_gift_exchange)** > > A white elephant gift exchange, Yankee swap or Dirty Santa\[nb 1\] is a party game where amusing and impractical gifts are exchanged during Christmas festivities. The goal of a white elephant gift exchange is to entertain party-goers rather than to give or acquire a genuinely valuable or highly sought-after item. In a Yankee swap, the gifts exchanged are more likely to be practical or items that will be wanted by players. The game is played by opening gifts or "stealing" items that othe The term wh... I enjoy them very much, and most people I know enjoy gingerbread. Not everyone of course. Not _everyone_ likes chocolate. :eek: I also like \*some \*fruitcakes. So, while it’s OK for you to say you don’t participate, speaking for everyone else is just a tad hypocritical, neh? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309.md?page=6) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-christmas-season-mini-rants/562309.md?page=8)