# Ho Fucking Ho - December Mini-Rants **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 1, 2023, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961 "2023-12-01T13:55:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![WolfpackJeep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpackjeep/32/2921_2.png) [@WolfpackJeep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WolfpackJeep)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2023, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/141 "2023-12-09T00:06:32Z")
> [@Loach](#): > > Why is tea such a hard concept for many restaurants? Try ordering tea in the south…it’s always iced, and is either a syrupy sweet substance (sweet tea) or a watered down, vaguely amber liquid that might have a slight acidic note (unsweetened tea). ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2023, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/142 "2023-12-09T00:20:25Z")
> [@Atamasama](#): > > Funny thing is, you can with Google Maps. I can go into the app, go into Settings, go into Navigation, and for “Guidance Volume” set it to “Louder”, “Normal”, or “Softer”. I never knew this! Thanks! ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2023, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/143 "2023-12-09T00:31:08Z")
My podcast/Google Maps mini-rant is that I have one podcast I listen to which is only available on Amazon Music. There’s no way to pause the podcast playback while GM is speaking, although at least the podcast can be silenced during the directions. So after every direction, I would have to back up the podcast if I don’t want to miss something. Therefore I can only listen to it if I don’t need Maps on. My regular podcast app is set so that the podcast pauses while Google Maps is speaking the directions, and then resumes as soon as GM stops. Why can’t Amazon? ---
**Author:** ![Seanette](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/seanette/32/9139_2.png) [@Seanette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seanette)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2023, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/144 "2023-12-09T00:32:52Z")
Speaking of Google Maps, I can’t get audio from it regardless of settings! I can attest that the car and my phone have a solid Bluetooth connection, since I’m using the phone as a music player, but Google Maps refuses to do audio, and so does Waze. ---
**Author:** ![Al128](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/al128/32/16541_2.png) [@Al128](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Al128)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2023, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/145 "2023-12-09T00:46:44Z")
only in the car, or overall w/out spoken output? ---
**Author:** ![Seanette](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/seanette/32/9139_2.png) [@Seanette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seanette)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2023, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/146 "2023-12-09T00:49:23Z")
Both. No audio, and I checked volume settings. ---
**Author:** ![slumtrimpet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@slumtrimpet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slumtrimpet)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2023, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/147 "2023-12-09T01:24:14Z")
I don’t use audio on my maps app in the car. I like my silence or my music. So I’m left with having to pay attention to the visual part of the app, particularly the ‘what’s coming up next’ part. My complaint is the opposite of what everyone else is complaining about. It’s when the app does not mention that there is a change of road coming up. Nothing, nada, no indication at all. And it’s not that the continuation is inevitable. Nope. It actually requires action on my part. I sometimes use the map app just to give me an ETA, not because I don’t know where to go, so I know where to turn. But if I didn’t I’d be fucked. It does show the turn needed on the actual map, but nothing on the ‘what’s coming up’ part which is also what I assume the audio would give me. Which leads me to conclude that when I do need the app to find my way it may well lie to me. Did you know really good paper map books are becoming rather difficult to find? ---
**Author:** ![romansperson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/romansperson/32/17100_2.png) [@romansperson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/romansperson)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2023, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/148 "2023-12-09T01:41:11Z")
…aaaaand the microwave saga continues. Everything seemed fine when the installer came, but today was the first day I actually used it to heat something up, and it makes a noise I can only describe as reminiscent of nails on a chalkboard. I’ve never heard a microwave make a sound like this, so now we have a service call next week. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2023, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/149 "2023-12-09T02:37:40Z")
> [@romansperson](#): > > I’ve never heard a microwave make a sound like this, so now we have a service call next week. Sounds like the carousel is scraping against something, it might even just be off the track. ---
**Author:** ![romansperson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/romansperson/32/17100_2.png) [@romansperson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/romansperson)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2023, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/150 "2023-12-09T02:50:13Z")
Nope. It’s internal somewhere to the machine. ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2023, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/151 "2023-12-09T05:18:38Z")
> [@Atamasama](#): > > Anyway, I know that I’m getting close to where I would normally turn, but all my device says is, “In 2 miles continue straight to stay on I-5.” Okay… No shit Google. I need to know when and where I **don’t** stay on the road, that’s why you fucking exist. Then I get past that spot, and it says, “In 1 mile continue straight…” Again, no shit. Finally, after I pass that, it says, “In half a mile take exit blah blah…” So it tells me to take an exit right before it appears, when I might have to cross 5 lanes of traffic at high speed, because it has been telling me to “continue straight” for the past 5 fucking minutes and won’t tell me when my next _real_ turn is. Now that problem I can fully appreciate, now that I’ve reread your mini-rant. I sympathize with your troubles and endorse your mini-rant. In my capacity as a Grumpy Old Fart with a minimalist “smart” phone that I’m too cheap to even set up with a data plan, I don’t use this stuff. What I use when I need it is a dedicated Magellan GPS that I picked up out of a jumble of clearance items many years ago that’s worked like a charm ever since, despite suffering all kinds of abuse being knocked around in the car and occasionally falling off the windshield. The Speaking Lady will occasionally – for no apparent reason – announce “remain on current road in 3 kilometers” which is both redundant and not even sensible grammar, but I don’t find it particularly annoying. The important thing that it does right is warn of a turn, exit, or fork three kilometers ahead, then again at one kilometer, and then finally when you’re almost there, accompanied by a two-tone ding, the same sound I’ve heard on airplane navigation systems when turning at a waypoint. It works well for me. I also use Google Maps for simple directions, but just in a static way on the computer at home to understand where the hell I’m going. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2023, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/152 "2023-12-09T05:38:18Z")
> [@wolfpup](#): > > and then finally when you’re almost there, accompanied by a two-tone ding, I used to have a Magellan GPS years ago. I liked that the two-tone dings were different for a right turn than a left turn - iirc, for one turn, they’d go up in pitch, and for the other turn, they’d go down. ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2023, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/153 "2023-12-09T05:49:32Z")
> [@needscoffee](#): > > I liked that the two-tone dings were different for a right turn than a left turn - iirc, for one turn, they’d go up in pitch, and for the other turn, they’d go down. Well, damn! Mine probably does that and I never noticed or appreciated it, thanks! Although the Speaking Lady makes it clear ahead of time that the turn is left or right (she has also learned the phrase “slight left (or right) turn” to mean a fork in the road). But the different ding tones are pretty cool! ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2023, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/154 "2023-12-09T06:32:42Z")
So, the Google Maps voice. Only one English setting says the names of streets. Fine. That’s the only English setting I use. Recently, when I visit friends in Washington, instead of the dulcet map lady voice, I get a pressured, scratchy, high-pitched young woman’s voice instead, with street names, for 2-3 streets in one neighborhood. It then resumes the regular map voice. Besides being startling, I _hate_ the scratchy voice. Where did it come from? How can I kill it? I find no settings for changing the voice, only for changing the language. And if only one English setting says the names of streets, why does scratchy lady tell me the streets? Is she a Canadian setting? And if so, _why?_ Android phone. ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2023, 7:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/155 "2023-12-09T07:08:47Z")
> [@susan](#): > > Is she a Canadian setting? Please! Canadian ladies don’t have “scratchy” voices. The Speaking Lady on my Canadian-issue Magellan GPS is very pleasant and in no way scratchy. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2023, 9:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/156 "2023-12-09T09:30:48Z")
> [@susan](#): > > Besides being startling, I _hate_ the scratchy voice. Where did it come from? How can I kill it? You need a priest and some holy water. ---
**Author:** ![teelabrown](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/teelabrown/32/8412_2.png) [@teelabrown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teelabrown)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2023, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/157 "2023-12-09T13:34:02Z")
I have my Siri/Apple maps set to “male English voice”. I was hoping, when I picked it, to get someone who sounded like Patrick Stewart or Benedict Cumberbatch. Instead, the speaker sounds like the Geico gecko. And it irritates the hell out of Mr. brown, so I keep it just out of sheer bloody-mindedness. My rant: I wanted to serve a good quiche for breakfast, so I labored over a top-notch pie crust. I stirred it up last night and chilled it in the fridge overnight, then rolled it out early this morning and blind-baked it with pie weights in the bottom while I prepared the filling. The sides of the crust all slumped down from the sides into the bottom. So no quiche this morning like I promised. I suppose I can make a fritatta out of the filling, and then bake the mess of a crust just like it is and eat it like shortbread for snacks. Dammit. ---
**Author:** ![Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mundane_super_hero/32/6304_2.png) [@Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mundane_Super_Hero)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2023, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/158 "2023-12-09T17:41:14Z")
A star will be eclipsed by an asteroid Monday night, but I won’t get to see it. One of you might though… > **[Asteroid will pass in front of bright star Betelgeuse to produce a rare...](https://apnews.com/article/asteroid-star-eclipse-betelgeuse-b9e3796c1ca915afdb84ed41509da9c8)** > > The star is Betelgeuse, a red supergiant in the constellation Orion. The asteroid is Leona, a space rock in the main asteroid belt between Mars and Jupiter. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2023, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/159 "2023-12-09T17:53:32Z")
I went searching for potato bread yesterday and there was none to be found – no brand at no grocery store; empty shelves a’plenty! Looks like the supply chain shortages have finally hit close to home. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2023, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/160 "2023-12-09T22:13:51Z")
> [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](#): > > I went searching for potato bread yesterday and there was none to be found – no brand at no grocery store; empty shelves a’plenty! Damn, potato bread is one of my favorites. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961.md?page=9)