# Hobbits: Absorbed into the Big Folk, extremely well-hidden, or gone the way of the dodo? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 14, 2010, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hobbits-absorbed-into-the-big-folk-extremely-well-hidden-or-gone-the-way-of-the-dodo/543212 "2010-06-14T22:35:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Septima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@Septima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Septima)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hobbits-absorbed-into-the-big-folk-extremely-well-hidden-or-gone-the-way-of-the-dodo/543212/21 "2010-06-15T19:49:17Z")
I chose option #1, since I’m pretty sure I’m living with a hobbit throwback. He’s in the kitchen right now, frying something that smells lovely. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hobbits-absorbed-into-the-big-folk-extremely-well-hidden-or-gone-the-way-of-the-dodo/543212/22 "2010-06-15T21:55:19Z")
Humans are at least as evil as Orcs, & a lot smarter. We wacked em. And made the toe hair into doileys. ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hobbits-absorbed-into-the-big-folk-extremely-well-hidden-or-gone-the-way-of-the-dodo/543212/23 "2010-06-15T22:00:21Z")
They’re still around. When in public, one hobbit typically hops on another’s shoulders and they wear a trenchcoat and a fedora. ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hobbits-absorbed-into-the-big-folk-extremely-well-hidden-or-gone-the-way-of-the-dodo/543212/24 "2010-06-15T22:50:26Z")
> [@robardin](#): > > Now somebody else, go on and Google “hobbit pr0n”. I won’t because I’m at work but I’d be amazed if it came up blank. You know somebody had to do it. Almost all of the porn I saw is not conducive to baby making. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hobbits-absorbed-into-the-big-folk-extremely-well-hidden-or-gone-the-way-of-the-dodo/543212/25 "2010-06-15T22:53:41Z")
My theory is that we Jews are what remains of the hobbits. We get shorter, hairier and more hobbitish as we age. We feel compelled to retire to Shirish parts of Florida and live in condos that look like Hobbit Holes. We deal in mathoms. We are mortally insulted if we offer a guest food and they turn it down. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hobbits-absorbed-into-the-big-folk-extremely-well-hidden-or-gone-the-way-of-the-dodo/543212/26 "2010-06-15T22:56:41Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > My theory is that we Jews are what remains of the hobbits. > > We get shorter, hairier and more hobbitish as we age. > > We feel compelled to retire to Shirish parts of Florida and live in condos that look like Hobbit Holes. > > We deal in mathoms. > > We are mortally insulted if we offer a guest food and they turn it down. Fool of a Took! Jews are Dwarves. Even the Perfesser admitted it. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hobbits-absorbed-into-the-big-folk-extremely-well-hidden-or-gone-the-way-of-the-dodo/543212/27 "2010-06-15T23:02:49Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Fool of a Took! > > Jews are Dwarves. Even the Perfesser admitted it. I’m open to the possibility that we are Dwarves, but I’m just not seeing it. Let’s see your evidence and hear your arguments. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hobbits-absorbed-into-the-big-folk-extremely-well-hidden-or-gone-the-way-of-the-dodo/543212/28 "2010-06-15T23:48:52Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > I’m open to the possibility that we are Dwarves, but I’m just not seeing it. Let’s see your evidence and hear your arguments. Do your womenfolk have beards? ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hobbits-absorbed-into-the-big-folk-extremely-well-hidden-or-gone-the-way-of-the-dodo/543212/29 "2010-06-15T23:53:43Z")
> [@Wile\_E](#): > > Do your womenfolk have beards? Not that I’ve noticed. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2010, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hobbits-absorbed-into-the-big-folk-extremely-well-hidden-or-gone-the-way-of-the-dodo/543212/30 "2010-06-16T00:12:07Z")
I believe there are yet Hobbits in the New Jersey prison system. Lugers, garrottes, pipe weed, insider trading, that sort of thing. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2010, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hobbits-absorbed-into-the-big-folk-extremely-well-hidden-or-gone-the-way-of-the-dodo/543212/31 "2010-06-16T07:01:04Z")
> [@](#): > > Not that I’ve noticed. Let me rephrase that for **Wile E** : Have you noticed that you have womenfolk at all? ---
**Author:** ![missred](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/missred/32/14096_2.png) [@missred](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/missred)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2010, 9:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hobbits-absorbed-into-the-big-folk-extremely-well-hidden-or-gone-the-way-of-the-dodo/543212/32 "2010-06-16T09:25:41Z")
::checks toes:: Yep, they married in. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![glowacks](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/glowacks/32/5548_2.png) [@glowacks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glowacks)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2010, 7:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hobbits-absorbed-into-the-big-folk-extremely-well-hidden-or-gone-the-way-of-the-dodo/543212/33 "2010-06-17T07:24:10Z")
I suppose some married in. Mostly they just went went extinct. Perhaps they were eaten by smilodons, but “other” was a better choice. They didn’t adapt to a changing environment, and were out-competed. ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2010, 7:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hobbits-absorbed-into-the-big-folk-extremely-well-hidden-or-gone-the-way-of-the-dodo/543212/34 "2010-06-17T07:50:57Z")
They emigrated to Flores and died there. ---
**Author:** ![Lobohan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobohan/32/79_2.png) [@Lobohan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobohan)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2010, 7:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hobbits-absorbed-into-the-big-folk-extremely-well-hidden-or-gone-the-way-of-the-dodo/543212/35 "2010-06-17T07:57:35Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > :: makes note in ShibbOleth’s file :: > > Keep it up, furball. You’re one blasphemy of Athena away from a flaming bee-swarm attack. Skald Minion #53: “About the flaming bee attacks Lord High Poobah…” Skald the Rhymer: [Adjusting Poobah hat] “What of them?” Skald Minion #53: “The bees, well… none of your enemies have been destroyed by them. The bees are burning to death the moment they leave the launcher.” Skald the Rhymer: [Eye twitches, dangerously] “…” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2010, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hobbits-absorbed-into-the-big-folk-extremely-well-hidden-or-gone-the-way-of-the-dodo/543212/36 "2010-06-17T15:50:40Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > I’m open to the possibility that we are Dwarves, but I’m just not seeing it. Let’s see your evidence and hear your arguments. See question 7 and its answer here: [Tolkien Newsgroups FAQ: Story External Discussions](http://tolkien.slimy.com/faq/External.html) Further discussion here: [http://forums.theonering.com/viewtopic.php?t=99439](http://forums.theonering.com/viewtopic.php?t=99439) ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2010, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hobbits-absorbed-into-the-big-folk-extremely-well-hidden-or-gone-the-way-of-the-dodo/543212/37 "2010-06-17T16:05:59Z")
> [@Lobohan](#): > > Skald Minion #53: “About the flaming bee attacks Lord High Poobah…” > > Skald the Rhymer: [Adjusting Poobah hat] “What of them?” > > Skald Minion #53: “The bees, well… none of your enemies have been destroyed by them. The bees are burning to death the moment they leave the launcher.” > > Skald the Rhymer: [Eye twitches, dangerously] “…” The bees burst into flame only when they sting. I learned from that last debacle with the SuperFriends. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hobbits-absorbed-into-the-big-folk-extremely-well-hidden-or-gone-the-way-of-the-dodo/543212.md?page=1)