# Hold my beer! and other phrases that happen before disaster **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 5, 2016, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251 "2016-04-05T14:06:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Ibn\_Warraq](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e19b73/32.png) [@Ibn\_Warraq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ibn_Warraq)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2016, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251/61 "2016-04-23T01:16:17Z")
What’s the worst that could happen. ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2016, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251/62 "2016-04-23T01:18:47Z")
“What’s this button do?” “Stirring Cryo Tanks. . .” > [@TriPolar](#): > > Cut the red wire. You stole my line. Bastid! ::shakesfist:: You _ **never** _ cut the red wire. Tripler That’s like, “day one” training. ---
**Author:** ![Cinnamon\_Imp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58956e/32.png) [@Cinnamon\_Imp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cinnamon_Imp)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2016, 12:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251/63 "2016-04-23T12:04:50Z")
“What happens when you do _this_?” ---
**Author:** ![PoppaSan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/poppasan/32/189_2.png) [@PoppaSan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PoppaSan)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2016, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251/64 "2016-04-23T13:54:54Z")
To be perfectly honest . . . To your SO: I’ve always wanted to bang your sister/cousin/friend. How about a threesome? Yes I’ve babysat a \ before. How hard can it be? ---
**Author:** ![Ranger\_Jeff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranger_jeff/32/2065_2.png) [@Ranger\_Jeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranger_Jeff)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2016, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251/65 "2016-04-23T14:40:41Z")
This thread reminds me of the lyrics to “Put Another Log On The Fire”. \*Now don’t I let you wash the car on Sunday? Don’t I warn you when you’re gettin fat? Ain’t I a-gonna take you fishin’ with me someday? Well, a man can’t love a woman more than that. Ain’t I always nice to your kid sister? Don’t I take her driving every night? So, sit here at my feet 'cos I like you when you’re sweet, And you know it ain’t feminine to fight. \* ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2016, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251/66 "2016-04-23T14:55:50Z")
“Security - send two men to investigate a disturbance on deck C.” ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2016, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251/67 "2016-04-23T14:57:56Z")
> [@Urbanredneck](#): > > Honey, do you think this outfit makes me look fat? > > note - there is no way a man can answer that one without disaster. Ah, but try this one: “Honey, do you think this outfit makes me look fat?” “Sadly the colour doesn’t suit you.” ---
**Author:** ![Catamount](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/catamount/32/2840_2.png) [@Catamount](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catamount)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2016, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251/68 "2016-04-23T17:01:14Z")
“I’m retiring tomorrow!” That one only works if you’re a cop, though. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2016, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251/69 "2016-04-23T17:19:50Z")
> [@Tripler](#): > > “What’s this button do?” > > “Stirring Cryo Tanks. . .” > > You stole my line. Bastid! ::shakesfist:: > > You _ **never** _ cut the red wire. > > Tripler > That’s like, “day one” training. Hey Tripler! How’s it hangin’? First my username, now that post, seems I’m always stealing from you. TriPolar I’m not Tripler ---
**Author:** ![Azile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d07c76/32.png) [@Azile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azile)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2016, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251/70 "2016-04-25T03:35:18Z")
“Don’t worry, it’s dead.” Works for both power lines and animals! ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2016, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251/71 "2016-04-25T03:41:17Z")
> [@Azile](#): > > “Don’t worry, it’s dead.” \ “…Jim.” ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2016, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251/72 "2016-04-25T22:42:03Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Hey Tripler! How’s it hangin’? > > First my username, now that post, seems I’m always stealing from you. Hey man! Doin’ well, and yourself? I’m out on the East Coast for a few days. Neutrons, protons, gamma rays, etc. What could _possibly_ go wrong? 😃 Tripler I’m not TriPolar. ---
**Author:** ![Annoying\_Buzz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eb8c5e/32.png) [@Annoying\_Buzz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annoying_Buzz)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2016, 7:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251/73 "2016-04-27T07:56:33Z")
“Don’t worry, they’re used to people.” “What? It’s not like she’ll ever find out.” ---
**Author:** ![Dodgecity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/cab0a1/32.png) [@Dodgecity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dodgecity)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2016, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251/74 "2016-04-28T03:57:08Z")
Grab the wheel Who knew? Let’s try this ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2016, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251/75 "2016-04-28T04:09:30Z")
The classic one from D&D: “Don’t worry, I think the dragon’s asleep.” ---
**Author:** ![The\_King\_of\_Soup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a87d85/32.png) [@The\_King\_of\_Soup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_King_of_Soup)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2016, 5:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251/76 "2016-04-28T05:25:34Z")
“Check out my signature move!” Uttered 4.2 seconds before my son’s second trip to the ER ---
**Author:** ![Common\_Tater](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/common_tater/32/13846_2.png) [@Common\_Tater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Common_Tater)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2016, 6:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251/77 "2016-04-28T06:24:59Z")
“You don’t have the guts to shoot me.” “What are the odds?” “Relax. I’ve done this a million times.” “Pfft. What the hell do they know?” ---
**Author:** ![MEBuckner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mebuckner/32/2896_2.png) [@MEBuckner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MEBuckner)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2016, 6:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251/78 "2016-04-28T06:42:54Z")
“Don’t worry, baby, I’ll pull out in time.” ---
**Author:** ![smithsb](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smithsb/32/12107_2.png) [@smithsb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smithsb)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2016, 8:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251/79 "2016-04-28T08:34:02Z")
“Oooooh, what a creepy house. I’ll check out the basement with the one credited as ‘Screaming girl no. 1’ and you take ‘Screaming girl no.2’ with you up to the attic.” “They must have included these extra parts for idiots who can’t put things together right.” ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2016, 11:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251/80 "2016-04-28T11:01:43Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > The classic one from D&D: > > “Don’t worry, I think the dragon’s asleep.” My classics: “I’ll lead the away team. Ensign Newguy Redshirt, you’re with me.” “Oh, I balanced the equations using antimatter.” “Set the safeties to zero and fire both tubes.” Tripler All TV/movie quotes. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hold-my-beer-and-other-phrases-that-happen-before-disaster/751251.md?page=5)