# Holiday Pop Songs that are a crime against ears **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 29, 2001, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025 "2001-11-29T22:38:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![mouthbreather](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a698b9/32.png) [@mouthbreather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mouthbreather)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2001, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025/21 "2001-11-30T19:51:25Z")
Although it is a standard in my house 'round the holidays, many of my guests don’t care much for the **Butthole Surfer’s** rendition of _Good King Wencenslaus_. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2001, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025/22 "2001-11-30T19:55:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mudshark \* > \*\*I have three words : > > N\*SYNC Christmas Album \*\* My sister OWNS that album. _shudder_ I like two of the songs listed-“Rocking Around the Xmas Tree,” “Jingle Bell Rock.” One really bad one-Bruce Springsteen doing “Santa Claus is Coming to Town.” Springsteen is talented, but I cannot STAND this song. ---
**Author:** ![MovieMogul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f08c70/32.png) [@MovieMogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MovieMogul)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2001, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025/23 "2001-11-30T20:26:54Z")
> [@](#): > > I HATE the Wings Christmas song. “Sim~ply ha~ving a wonderful Christ~mas~time!” “Ding-Dong-Ding-Dong-Ding-Dong!” **AAAAAAHHHHHHH** [thump][thump][thump][sub]bashing head into wall[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![delphica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9a140/32.png) [@delphica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/delphica)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2001, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025/24 "2001-11-30T20:37:56Z")
I actually like most of the songs mentioned in this thread. I hope you guys will still be my friends. But, to each his/her own. I don’t even know the title of the one holiday song that leaves me in convulsions. It’s a treacly piece of hooey, about some kid asking Santa for some smary gift for his mother, who, in a surprise plot twist, lives in heaven now, or somesuch dreck. It’s just awful, and listening to this song would be enough to make Mother Theresa beat orphans. As opposed to the above song, “I’m Getting Nuthin’ for Christmas” holds the place of honor in our holiday home as the song we love to hate. When we hear it, there is much lamenting of fate, and gnashing of teeth, and tearing of hair. Yet, I have noticed we do not turn off the radio. There’s a perverse enjoyment in there somewhere. ---
**Author:** ![Odieman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a87d85/32.png) [@Odieman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odieman)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025/25 "2001-12-01T00:30:59Z")
Actually “Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time” isn’t the worst Paul McCartney christmas song…the flip side of the original single is…“Rudolph the Red Nose Reggae” yup…an instrumental reggae version of Rudolph… ---
**Author:** ![Mofo\_Rising](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Mofo\_Rising](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mofo_Rising)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 2:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025/26 "2001-12-01T02:43:39Z")
Perusing the aisles of Best Buy today, I was lucky to be gifted with this _absolute treat_ of a song from Christina Aguilera, “Everybody’s Home for Christmas”. The song, as far as I can tell, consists of the phrase “Everybody’s home for Christmas” sung over and over and over and over. You’d think some other lyrics would be in order, or maybe even a break into a musical interlude, but you’d be wrong. It’s just “Everybody’s home for Christmas” over and over and over and over. I’ve come to the conclusion that the music selectors at Best Buy hate their customers. ---
**Author:** ![pepperlandgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f17d59/32.png) [@pepperlandgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pepperlandgirl)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025/27 "2001-12-01T04:21:19Z")
The song that’s driving me crazy this year? **Mamacita, Donde Esta Santa Clause?**. It really is as bad as it sounds. ---
**Author:** ![hegel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/cab0a1/32.png) [@hegel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hegel)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025/28 "2001-12-01T05:30:48Z")
Step Into Christmas–Elton John. ---
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 9:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025/29 "2001-12-01T09:17:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by mouthbreather \* > \*\*Although it is a standard in my house 'round the holidays, many of my guests don’t care much for the **Butthole Surfer’s** rendition of _Good King Wencenslaus_. \*\* Good King Wencenslaus? Cool! Where can I get it? And who wants to dare me to play it at work in place of that damn Charlotte Church? ---
**Author:** ![bibliophile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e36b37/32.png) [@bibliophile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bibliophile)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025/30 "2001-12-01T16:09:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by pepperlandgirl \* > \*\*The song that’s driving me crazy this year? **Mamacita, Donde Esta Santa Clause?**. It really is as bad as it sounds. \*\* it’s not as bad as it sounds, it’s worse. whoever wrote that song should be drug out in the street and shot in the head at close range with a large caliber weapon. sorry, few things offend me more than bad music. speaking of bad music, i’ve always hated i saw mommy kissing santa claus, especially john mellencamp’s version where his daughter sings at the end. i’m sure she’s a lovely child [even though she’s probably 25 by now] but just because something is cute in your living room doesn’t mean the entire world needs to be subjected to it again, and again, and again. ---
**Author:** ![pepperlandgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f17d59/32.png) [@pepperlandgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pepperlandgirl)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025/31 "2001-12-01T18:16:17Z")
> [@](#): > > it’s not as bad as it sounds, it’s worse. whoever wrote that song should be drug out in the street and shot in the head at close range with a large caliber weapon. sorry, few things offend me more than bad music. LOL. Man, if I didn’t know better, I’d think you were my husband! He feels the exact same way about that song. ---
**Author:** ![Miss\_Gretchen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Miss\_Gretchen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miss_Gretchen)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025/32 "2001-12-01T19:22:31Z")
I dunno if it’s a local radio thing (You know the kind of station with the “wacky” toilet humour morning show) but every freakin’ year they trot out “Walkin’ 'round in women’s underwear” to the tune of “Walking in a Winter Wonderland”. Sure, it was kind of cutesy for about 30 seconds the first time they played it - TEN FREAKIN’ YEARS AGO!!! I know that I have many more hated tunes, but I think that my brain is practicing some sort of mental self preservation by not letting me remember them. “Santa Baby” - Ugghhhh, curses to all of you who suggested that! Now it’s trapped in my head! ---
**Author:** ![Dryga\_Yes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/838e76/32.png) [@Dryga\_Yes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dryga_Yes)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025/33 "2001-12-01T23:28:48Z")
I’ve been making my family crazy with the Flaming Lips’s “Christmas at the Zoo” for the whole day. I absolutely love that song. If I ever meet a woman who enjoys it I’ll marry her, no questions asked. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f8ce5/32.png) [@The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Peyote_Coyote)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025/34 "2001-12-01T23:38:26Z")
I vote for “Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer” It was not too horrible on the first listening, but by the 10,000th listening, the novelty had worn off. I take great pride in having gone the past four Xmas seasons without listening to it. ---
**Author:** ![pepperlandgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f17d59/32.png) [@pepperlandgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pepperlandgirl)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2001, 4:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025/35 "2001-12-02T04:16:52Z")
I personally think that Grandpa knocked off Grandma and the poor kid is living in severe denial. Why else would Grandpa take the news so well? ---
**Author:** ![bibliophile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e36b37/32.png) [@bibliophile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bibliophile)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2001, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025/36 "2001-12-02T04:40:23Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Miss Gretchen \* > \*\*I dunno if it’s a local radio thing (You know the kind of station with the “wacky” toilet humour morning show) but every freakin’ year they trot out “Walkin’ 'round in women’s underwear” to the tune of “Walking in a Winter Wonderland”. Sure, it was kind of cutesy for about 30 seconds the first time they played it - TEN FREAKIN’ YEARS AGO!!! > > \*\* On a similar note, I’m not sure how widespread this one is but radio stations here constantly run “The 10 Things at Christmas That are a Pain to Me,” set to the tune of, well you know. Instead of five golden rings, there’s a cranky guy screaming about putting up the lights. I chuckled the first time I heard it. Now, I quickly change the station. ---
**Author:** ![amarinth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3be4f8/32.png) [@amarinth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amarinth)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2001, 8:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025/37 "2001-12-02T08:35:01Z")
Driving home tonight I heard “Christmas in the Northwest” for the first time this year - IIRC it was recorded for some kind of charity thing about 10 years ago, and if the rest of you are lucky, you can’t hear this song outside of the greater Seattle area. It’s this hideous soft-rocky, piece of crap that usually gets played to death around here every Christmastime, with a chorus that ends “'cause Christmas in the Northwest is a gift God wrapped in green” and that’s one of the better lines. And yet, still totally unable to turn it off. ---
**Author:** ![Tedster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4491bb/32.png) [@Tedster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tedster)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2001, 8:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025/38 "2001-12-02T08:49:57Z")
“Happy Christmas, War is Over” by John Lennon “Have a Holly, Jolly Christmas” Burl Ives ---
**Author:** ![Mudshark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f04885/32.png) [@Mudshark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mudshark)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2001, 9:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025/39 "2001-12-02T09:18:56Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Tedster \* > \*\*“Happy Christmas, War is Over” by John Lennon > > \*\* How is that a bad song? It is not Christmas with out that song. That is my all time favorite Christmas song. ---
**Author:** ![JDeMobray](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/85e7bf/32.png) [@JDeMobray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JDeMobray)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2001, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025/40 "2001-12-02T19:53:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by amarinth \* > \*\*Driving home tonight I heard “Christmas in the Northwest” for the first time this year - IIRC it was recorded for some kind of charity thing about 10 years ago, and if the rest of you are lucky, you can’t hear this song outside of the greater Seattle area. It’s this hideous soft-rocky, piece of crap that usually gets played to death around here every Christmastime, with a chorus that ends “'cause Christmas in the Northwest is a gift God wrapped in green” and that’s one of the better lines. > > And yet, still totally unable to turn it off. \*\* > [@](#): > > From Memory: > \*May not be white. > Might be a rainy night. > But there’s nothing, > Like Christmas, > Right here at home > > Wind may not blow. > Might not even snow. > But there’s nothing, > Like sharing, > The sounds and the sights of > > Christmas in the Northwest > Is a gift that we can share > Christmas in the Northwest > Is a Child’s answered prayer > > (Oh you can . . .) > Take away the presents > And they still would have a tree > 'Cause Christmas in the Northwest > Ist a gift God wrapped in Green\* I **hate** this song. Hate it with the white-hot passion of a thousand suns. When I was very young, and the album had first been released, my mother’s car had only an AM radio and so while driving I would “get” to listen to this song about 1600 times per mile traveled. I love Christmas. I love Christmas carols (I drive my roommate’s insane by pulling out my Christmas CD’s at the stroke of midnight on November 1st :)). But this song. . . . Eehhhhrrrrrgggh. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holiday-pop-songs-that-are-a-crime-against-ears/96025.md?page=3)