# Holy Mother of God, were you raised in a fucking WINDMILL?!? (kinda long) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 12, 2003, 9:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-mother-of-god-were-you-raised-in-a-fucking-windmill-kinda-long/201168 "2003-09-12T09:38:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 9:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-mother-of-god-were-you-raised-in-a-fucking-windmill-kinda-long/201168/61 "2003-09-16T09:42:34Z")
Oh, poor **Scarlet Pimpernel** , you live with _hotello’s_? They truly are the worst of all - you have my sympathy. I took the liberty of checking your IP address: you’re in the same city I studied in! Whereabouts do you live? Maybe you’re in one of my old rooms. 🙂 I lived with a couple of _hotello’s_ for a few years, and for some reason, they are WAY filthier than your average student (like I was). Which is odd, given that they are being taught so much about hygiene in school, what with a lot of them doing kitchen stuff. But they all were pigs: one of the girls I lived with had the habit of _clipping her fucking toenails while resting her feet (always walked barefoot in this dirty student house, which was just filthy in and of itself) on the coffee table in the living room_. Well, I shouldn’t say habit, she did it exactly once that I saw. I cursed the living hell out of her, and never saw her do it again. Still, reading your follow-up post, maybe these kids aren’t so bad. At least they have a weekly cleaning ritual, which is more than could be said for some of my former places of residence. Admittedly, I never made it into the **jjimm** or **fruitbat** realms (a dead mouse with a fork up its ass, functioning as a fridge door handle. I BOW to thee.), but I lived in some pretty messy houses all right. As for them running around at a quarter to 1 in the morning: c’mon now. That’s not “morning” to students. Also, don’t use words like “week night” in this context: when you’re in college, life is one big weekend where you just happen to go to class every now and then. 🙂 I’m with you on the hygiene rant (at least when it gets to be TOO disgusting), but as for the odd hours: they’re students. If late night noise really bothers you (where late night is defined as “shortly after midnight”), then in my experience, Dutch student housing isn’t the place for you. Are you enjoying your stay in Maastricht so far? Are you at the _Conservatorium_, then? Right next to the Faculty of Economics, where I used to spend my time studying. Well, some of my time. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 10:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-mother-of-god-were-you-raised-in-a-fucking-windmill-kinda-long/201168/62 "2003-09-16T10:05:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jjimm \* > \*\*Sink Fever by John Masefield > > I must down to the sink again, to the lonely sink and the mold, > And all I ask is some Fairy Liquid, and a brush for me to hold. > And for the smelly stink in the fetid sink, that won’t stand close inspection, > And the grey scum on the dish-water’s surface, I need gloves to prevent infection.\*\* The horrible thing about this is that I’ve sung the John Ireland setting of the other version of Masefield’s poem, and I may never be able to do so again without thinking “I must go down to the sink again, to the lonely sink and the mold…” Thanks a hell of a lot, **jjimm**. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 10:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-mother-of-god-were-you-raised-in-a-fucking-windmill-kinda-long/201168/63 "2003-09-16T10:12:17Z")
'Twas college, and the slimy stoves Did rot and fester in the flats All moldy were the week-old loaves And the students loafed around like twats. ---
**Author:** ![the\_Scarlet\_Pimpernel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f1d935/32.png) [@the\_Scarlet\_Pimpernel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_Scarlet_Pimpernel)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-mother-of-god-were-you-raised-in-a-fucking-windmill-kinda-long/201168/64 "2003-09-16T14:27:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Coldfire \* > **I took the liberty of checking your IP address: you’re in the same city I studied in! Whereabouts do you live? Maybe you’re in one of my old rooms. 🙂** **Coldy**! How cool! Im living in Scharn, right behind the Albert Heijn supermarket. Im told it’s the best part of Scharn to be living in. Well, dont I feel all swell. 🆒 > [@](#): > > **As for them running around at a quarter to 1 in the morning: c’mon now. That’s not “morning” to students. Also, don’t use words like “week night” in this context: when you’re in college, life is one big weekend where you just happen to go to class every now and then. 🙂** Yes, very true. And I _am_ a musician. Ordinarily I wouldnt even be starting to think about going to bed at 1 in the morning. Just, like I said, when I have to be at class at eight a.m. (ugh). > [@](#): > > **Are you enjoying your stay in Maastricht so far? Are you at the _Conservatorium_, then?** Yup. And so far I love it. Every weekend since Ive been here the city has had some sort of huge cultural thing going on. I feel quite cosmopolitan. 🆒 Whoops, sorry, was that a hijack? Did I just hijack my own thread? ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-mother-of-god-were-you-raised-in-a-fucking-windmill-kinda-long/201168/65 "2003-09-16T14:50:43Z")
Not a bad area, if a bit far away from the action. Well, it’s all relative: 10 minute bike ride to the Vrijthof, but that was huge when I lived there. Granted, I started off in Veldwezelt, Belgium, and only moved in to town after two years. I lived on the Louis Loyensstraat (near the Pathé cinema at the Wilhelminabrug) and the Orléansplein (behind the Emmaplein roundabout), respectively. Scharn’s OK, and it’s handy to have a big supermarket nearby. Did the _Preuvenemint_ already take place, or is that this coming weekend? ---
**Author:** ![the\_Scarlet\_Pimpernel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f1d935/32.png) [@the\_Scarlet\_Pimpernel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_Scarlet_Pimpernel)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-mother-of-god-were-you-raised-in-a-fucking-windmill-kinda-long/201168/66 "2003-09-16T15:08:02Z")
The _Preuvenemint_ was two weekends ago. This coming weekend is _Musica Sacra_. For the sake of thoroughness, this last weekend was _Het Parcours_, billed as the start of the Maastricht cultural season, with free plays and concerts all over the place. The Wilhelminabrug I know, probably know Emmaplein too, or at least would recognize it, but cant put the name to the place. I _have_ only been living here for 2 1/2 weeks, after all. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-mother-of-god-were-you-raised-in-a-fucking-windmill-kinda-long/201168/67 "2003-09-16T15:26:35Z")
It’s a fun city, and definitely one of the prettiest, if not _the_ prettiest, of the Netherlands. The atmosphere is actually more Belgian than Dutch. I love going there, and frequently do, as one of my best friends married a local girl and stuck around. 🙂 If you’re into specialty beers (mostly Belgian), I can recommend Café “Take One” on the Rechtstraat. The owner’s name is Peet - tell him Jasper sent you. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ccd318/32.png) [@Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paul_in_Qatar)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-mother-of-god-were-you-raised-in-a-fucking-windmill-kinda-long/201168/68 "2003-09-16T17:02:42Z")
I didn’t know Nederlanders (Dutchmen, Hans Brinkers, whatever) are ALLOWED to be messy. Their country always seemed so clean to me. (Of course, look where I live.) ---
**Author:** ![fruitbat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/58f4c7/32.png) [@fruitbat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fruitbat)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-mother-of-god-were-you-raised-in-a-fucking-windmill-kinda-long/201168/69 "2003-09-16T17:10:20Z")
The person mentioned in that story is Christopher Hagelstein of Worcester, MA. I only post his name because he would be perversly proud of his filthiness. At the time he was moving in I was in that stage of a relationship with my now wife where I spent most of my time awake and asleep at her place. I remember the day he moved in he got inspired and spent a couple of hundred dollars at the grocery store and vowed to reform his filthy ways. He stored all the meat, milk etc in the refrigerator (pre forky-mouse). By our count the fridge was not opened again for six months. All food was takeout. All beer and soda was bought cold and consumed on the spot. I kid you not that it was not opened for any reason for half of a year. It was a holocaust of stink by the time my other roommate cleaned it out. ---
**Author:** ![the\_Scarlet\_Pimpernel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f1d935/32.png) [@the\_Scarlet\_Pimpernel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_Scarlet_Pimpernel)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2003, 11:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-mother-of-god-were-you-raised-in-a-fucking-windmill-kinda-long/201168/70 "2003-09-17T11:59:04Z")
Thanks for the tip, **Coldy**! Im going out this weekend with a Yank friend of mine (who’s been living here for a while) and I will take him there and impress him with my knowledge of the local ways. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2003, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-mother-of-god-were-you-raised-in-a-fucking-windmill-kinda-long/201168/71 "2003-09-17T22:10:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Larry Mudd \* > \*\*Nah, **Pimpie** can’t get the last word, because **Gyrate** hasn’t shown us Lewis Carroll’s take on domestic squalor yet. (Added points for anything outside of _Jabborwocky_.) \*\* Not to detract from **jjimm** ’s contribution, but I’m going for the extra points: > [@](#): > > **Post-Party Depression, or the Morning-After Quadrille** > > “Will you walk a bit more softly?” said a student, looking pale, > “I am feeling rather fragile from tequila shots and ale, > My mouth tastes like rancid guano and my eyes feel full of ants, > And I’m naked for some reason – will you help me find my pants? > Will you, won’t you, will you, won’t you help me find my pants? > Will you, won’t you, will you, won’t you, help me find my pants? > > “There are beer cans on the balcony and bottles on the stair, > There’s a shaved Chihuahua in my bed (now how did that get there?), > Someone’s painted the piano keys and shat in all the plants, > And despite my frantic searching I still cannot find my pants. > Cannot, have not, cannot, have not, cannot find my pants. > Cannot, have not, cannot, have not, have not found my pants." > > “What matters it how bad the mess?” his housemate quipped and smiled, > “There’s another bash tonight, you know, which should be twice as wild. > There’s a stripper that I’ve hired that does this thing with cormorants; > When you see it, trust me, you’ll be glad you could not find your pants. > Could not, did not, could not, did not, could not find your pants. > Could not, did not, could not, did not, did not find your pants. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2003, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-mother-of-god-were-you-raised-in-a-fucking-windmill-kinda-long/201168/72 "2003-09-17T22:18:19Z")
I take off my parodic poetry cap and lay it on the ground at **Gyrate’s** feet. Stamp it into the ground, sir, it isn’t worth anything any more. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2003, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-mother-of-god-were-you-raised-in-a-fucking-windmill-kinda-long/201168/73 "2003-09-17T22:33:40Z")
Bravo! It was everything I hoped it would be, and more. 10 points from the Canadian judge. ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2003, 9:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-mother-of-god-were-you-raised-in-a-fucking-windmill-kinda-long/201168/74 "2003-09-18T09:50:44Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by the Scarlet Pimpernel \* > Thanks for the tip, **Coldy**! Im going out this weekend with a Yank friend of mine (who’s been living here for a while) and I will take him there and impress him with my knowledge of the local ways. 😉 I’ll have you know that I will be in Maastricht this weekend, too, and should be at the aforementioned bar on Saturday night! 🙂 Just look for a slightly chunky Dutchman with a rather American sounding accent, and a beautiful girl with a _very_ American sounding accent (my GF **Heloise** , who actually _is_ American), and another Dutch couple, who’ll have the usual Dutch accent. Maybe we’ll raise a glass in a day or two. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![the\_Scarlet\_Pimpernel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f1d935/32.png) [@the\_Scarlet\_Pimpernel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_Scarlet_Pimpernel)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2003, 10:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-mother-of-god-were-you-raised-in-a-fucking-windmill-kinda-long/201168/75 "2003-09-18T10:52:43Z")
Ooh, ooh, when? Id actually been planning to watch the Women’s World Cup this Saturday, but I see from another thread that the WUSA has folded, so that may put the kibosh on my plans. If the game is on, I will be there around midnight - would you all still be there that late? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-mother-of-god-were-you-raised-in-a-fucking-windmill-kinda-long/201168.md?page=3)