# Holy Smokes! Trump Got Himself an Inauguration Pome! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 18, 2017, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444 "2017-01-18T02:10:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Azeotrope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/0ea827/32.png) [@Azeotrope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azeotrope)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2017, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444/41 "2017-01-18T18:22:34Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > You wanna go that route, then I’ll point out that the OP doesn’t say whether it’s official or not. > > It’s just how people talk. No need to try and pick an argument. > > I mean, when a website throws out three errors just trying to load, I don’t think any of us took it that seriously. Worst haiku ever. ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2017, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444/42 "2017-01-18T18:27:40Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > Whenever Donald Trump went down town, > We people on the pavement looked at him: > > Eh, just skip to the end. I volunteer to pay for the bullet. ---
**Author:** ![I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/i_love_me_vol.i/32/521_2.png) [@I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_Love_Me_Vol.I)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2017, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444/43 "2017-01-18T18:40:00Z")
grabbed pussy too hard her piss can not flow freely Shower not Golden ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2017, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444/44 "2017-01-18T18:40:38Z")
> [@](#): > > …Say I’m weary, say I’m sad, > Say that health and wealth have missed me, > Say I’m growing old, but add, > Jenny kissed me. Used sparingly, sentiment is a good antidote. ---
**Author:** ![xenophon41](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xenophon41/32/253_2.png) [@xenophon41](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xenophon41)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2017, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444/45 "2017-01-18T18:59:23Z")
Slavic pee on bed British ex spy dossier Twitter tirade: Sad! ---
**Author:** ![Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/son_of_a_rich/32/5439_2.png) [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Son_of_a_Rich)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2017, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444/46 "2017-01-18T19:04:50Z")
> [@The\_Tooth](#): > > Bush’s two terms > Were only a bump > Compared to the shitstorm > That is Trump > BurmaShave This is my favorite 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2017, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444/47 "2017-01-18T19:04:56Z")
If Obama had watched hookers pee on a bed in Moscow in 2008, would he be the president today…? ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2017, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444/48 "2017-01-18T19:12:21Z")
Depends on how he explained it to Michelle. If he had all the Secret Service agents and Seal Team Six, wouldn’t be enough. ---
**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2017, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444/49 "2017-01-18T21:22:34Z")
> [@Ukulele\_Ike](#): > > If Obama had watched hookers pee on a bed in Moscow in 2008, would he be the president today…? If?! :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Walken\_After\_Midnight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b487fb/32.png) [@Walken\_After\_Midnight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walken_After_Midnight)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2017, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444/50 "2017-01-18T21:23:14Z")
Trump has [tweeted a photo of himself](https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/821772494864580614) “writing his inaugural address” at “the Winter White House”. He’s craftily bending the top of the page with his hand to prevent us from getting any sneak preview. Minutes later, he departed. Unmindfully, though, he had carelessly ripped off the top sheet of paper and left behind the rest of the notepad. By employing the trick of rubbing a pencil lightly over the pad, somebody has managed to replicate what the president-elect put to paper on that momentous and historic day in Mar-a-Lago. [Here it is](https://secondlife.i.lithium.com/t5/image/serverpage/image-id/107199i05F7611FC552168C/image-size/original?v=mpbl-1&px=-1). ---
**Author:** ![Shoeless](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shoeless/32/7099_2.png) [@Shoeless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shoeless)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2017, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444/51 "2017-01-18T21:28:37Z")
Somewhere around here is the thread with the dirty limericks about the Turkish President. We could probably rework some of those for the Inauguration. ---
**Author:** ![August\_West](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/august_west/32/18069_2.png) [@August\_West](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/August_West)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2017, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444/52 "2017-01-18T21:45:01Z")
I’ve had that song “Lump” running through my head for weeks, excepting changing the lyrics to fit Trump. So with my apologies to the **Presidents of the United States of America** , here are my semi-reworked lyrics. > [@](#): > > Trump sat alone atop a boggy swamp, > ascending to power with circumstance and pomp > Serenaded by Toby Keith > Something even KISS found their dignity beneath. > > He’s Trump, He’s Trump, He’s Trump > He’s carrot-hued > He’s Trump, He’s Trump, He’s Trump > And absurdly crude. > > Trump lingered last in line for brains > and the one he got was sorta rotten and insane (no change, original lyrics work well) > He had Russian hookers pee on sheets > A premium service only for elites > > He’s Trump, He’s Trump, He’s Trump > What’s with that coif? > He’s Trump, He’s Trump, He’s Trump > A real jerkoff. ---
**Author:** ![Fiveyearlurker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/da6949/32.png) [@Fiveyearlurker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiveyearlurker)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2017, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444/53 "2017-01-18T21:57:50Z")
I hate that this was debunked before I was able to make a Vogon reference. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2017, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444/54 "2017-01-18T22:38:27Z")
> [@Walken\_After\_Midnight](#): > > Trump has [tweeted a photo of himself](https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/821772494864580614) “writing his inaugural address” at “the Winter White House”. He’s craftily bending the top of the page with his hand to prevent us from getting any sneak preview. It’s uncanny— he seems so lifelike! ---
**Author:** ![Battle\_Pope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4bbf92/32.png) [@Battle\_Pope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Battle_Pope)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2017, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444/55 "2017-01-18T22:43:59Z")
> [@Walken\_After\_Midnight](#): > > Trump has [tweeted a photo of himself](https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/821772494864580614) “writing his inaugural address” at “the Winter White House”. He’s craftily bending the top of the page with his hand to prevent us from getting any sneak preview. “All work and no play makes Donald a dull boy.” “All work and no play makes Donald a dull boy.” “All work and no play makes Donald a dull boy.” “All work and no play makes Donald a dull boy.” [COLOR=black]“All work and no play makes Donald a dull boy.”[/COLOR] [COLOR=black][COLOR=black]“All work and no play makes Donald a dull boy.”[/COLOR][/COLOR] ---
**Author:** ![LouisB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@LouisB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LouisB)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2017, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444/56 "2017-01-18T22:48:35Z")
Donald Trump Took a dump Upon our constitution And then he said with his face bright red That was an elegant solution. ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2017, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444/57 "2017-01-19T01:07:29Z")
[QUOTE=Walken After Midnight] Trump has tweeted a photo of himself “writing his inaugural address” at “the Winter White House”. [/quote] [With a Sharpie. Sitting at the receptionist’s desk in the hall, apparently.](http://nymag.com/selectall/2017/01/why-doesnt-donald-trump-have-his-own-desk-at-mar-a-lago.html) ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2017, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444/58 "2017-01-19T01:42:48Z")
Hey! I’ve done some of my VERY best work on legal pads with a Sharpie at receptionists’ desks in public hallways! ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2017, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444/59 "2017-01-19T03:00:03Z")
> [@Walken\_After\_Midnight](#): > > Trump has [tweeted a photo of himself](https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/821772494864580614) “writing his inaugural address” at “the Winter White House”. He’s craftily bending the top of the page with his hand to prevent us from getting any sneak preview. He looks like he’s made out of wax. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Tooth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c67d28/32.png) [@The\_Tooth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Tooth)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2017, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444/60 "2017-01-19T03:19:10Z")
> [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](#): > > This is my favorite 🙂 Thanks! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/holy-smokes-trump-got-himself-an-inauguration-pome/777444.md?page=4)