# Home from the dollar store. SERIOUSLY creeped out. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 10, 2004, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/home-from-the-dollar-store-seriously-creeped-out/233394 "2004-03-10T01:56:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Cyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a88e4f/32.png) [@Cyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cyn)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2004, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/home-from-the-dollar-store-seriously-creeped-out/233394/41 "2004-03-10T19:19:58Z")
I love the dollar store. ---
**Author:** ![DMark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@DMark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DMark)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2004, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/home-from-the-dollar-store-seriously-creeped-out/233394/42 "2004-03-10T19:36:23Z")
Reminds me of a story in the film studio where I worked. A whole department got fired and the head of the department kept his job because he distanced himself from the staff (that he himself had hand picked). Someone sent him a cute, oriental box with two silver balls and an anonymous note: “Here are some balls to replace the ones you seem to lack.” ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2004, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/home-from-the-dollar-store-seriously-creeped-out/233394/43 "2004-03-10T19:50:11Z")
> [@Excalibre](#): > > Wait, what? Ben-wa balls are not the same as those pairs of heavy metal balls that come in the pretty boxes. The metal balls make noise when you spin them in your hands - that’s all they’re for. Ben-wa balls are a different thing entirely - the metal balls are not meant to be stuffed in there. > > I think these are just the kitschy little oriental gewgaws a lot of us have somewhere in our houses. These are not the same as ben-wa balls. Aren’t those usually attached together? Like, on a rope or something? > > BTW, folks, don’t shove those clinky metal balls up your ass. They might not come out. When shoving stuff up there, stick to things with a nice flared base. I have the same understanding of the Ben-Wa balls as you do. Those Eastern meditation thingies are completely different, and are supposed to come in fancy-schmancy boxes. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2004, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/home-from-the-dollar-store-seriously-creeped-out/233394/44 "2004-03-10T20:03:04Z")
> [@Excalibre](#): > > When shoving stuff up there, stick to things with a nice flared base. _nervously eyes the candelabra_ ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2004, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/home-from-the-dollar-store-seriously-creeped-out/233394/45 "2004-03-10T20:49:47Z")
> [@Excalibre](#): > > BTW, folks, don’t shove those clinky metal balls up your ass. They might not come out. When shoving stuff up there, stick to things with a nice flared base. This is a minor hijack, but there used to be footage of a colonoscopy done to retrieve a vibrator from some hapless person’s ass. The video had no sound, but you could hear the snickers in the text description. Robin ---
**Author:** ![wolf\_meister](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolf_meister/32/15202_2.png) [@wolf\_meister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolf_meister)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/home-from-the-dollar-store-seriously-creeped-out/233394/46 "2004-03-11T02:58:56Z")
Wow 45 postings and no one has mentioned **Humphrey Bogart as Captain Queeg in the Caine Mutiny** Didn’t Captain Queeg roll these “stress relievers” in his hands ? I could hardly imagine they would have made a major motion picture in the 1950’s that featured objects that could also be sexual toys. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Moto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9de0a6/32.png) [@Mr.Moto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Moto)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/home-from-the-dollar-store-seriously-creeped-out/233394/47 "2004-03-11T03:09:59Z")
> [@wolf\_meister](#): > > Wow 45 postings and no one has mentioned > **Humphrey Bogart as Captain Queeg in the Caine Mutiny** > > Didn’t Captain Queeg roll these “stress relievers” in his hands ? I could hardly imagine they would have made a major motion picture in the 1950’s that featured objects that could also be sexual toys. Too late! 😃 > [@Mr. Moto](#): > > They’re very handy to have around when you’re a lonely, put-upon naval officer, and somebody has stolen all of the frozen strawberries. > > The stress relievers, I mean. NOT the ben-wa balls. ---
**Author:** ![InternetLegend](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/internetlegend/32/13154_2.png) [@InternetLegend](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/InternetLegend)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/home-from-the-dollar-store-seriously-creeped-out/233394/48 "2004-03-11T03:19:51Z")
I was just finding your post to quote it, **Mr. Moto** , but you beat me to it. > [@Otto](#): > > How about a chicken puppet? Would you and Jeremy like a chicken puppet? Who wouldn’t want a chicken puppet? Assuming, of course, they already had anal beads. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![TellMeI\_mNotCrazy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tellmei_mnotcrazy/32/3419_2.png) [@TellMeI\_mNotCrazy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TellMeI_mNotCrazy)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/home-from-the-dollar-store-seriously-creeped-out/233394/49 "2004-03-11T03:22:34Z")
> [@Little Nemo](#): > > Ben-wa balls on sale for only a dollar? At those prices, you could have filled a box with them. _choking on coffee_ ---
**Author:** ![Kempis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kempis/32/19248_2.png) [@Kempis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kempis)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/home-from-the-dollar-store-seriously-creeped-out/233394/50 "2004-03-11T03:45:24Z")
> [@TellMeI'mNotCrazy](#): > > _choking on coffee_ What are you laughing at? :eek: oh… I get it now. 😃 Shame on you. ---
**Author:** ![dogbutler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dogbutler/32/428_2.png) [@dogbutler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dogbutler)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/home-from-the-dollar-store-seriously-creeped-out/233394/51 "2004-03-11T04:22:31Z")
> [@omni-not](#): > > **Freiheit** : They were _return_ ben wa balls… > > 😃 No returns,exchange only! **dogbutler** , Dollar Tree manager. Yes, I thought they were Ben-wa balls too. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/home-from-the-dollar-store-seriously-creeped-out/233394/52 "2004-03-11T04:28:17Z")
> [@wolfman](#): > > I had always thought it was spelled “benoit” not “ben-wa” Well, they _can_ cripple… ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/home-from-the-dollar-store-seriously-creeped-out/233394/53 "2004-03-11T05:12:28Z")
> [@scott evil](#): > > Up the butt? Answer: yes. You keep your smoking jacket up your butt? :eek: 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Kempis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kempis/32/19248_2.png) [@Kempis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kempis)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 5:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/home-from-the-dollar-store-seriously-creeped-out/233394/54 "2004-03-11T05:28:15Z")
I am appalled at this thread. You all need to go to church, and in a religion that doesn’t celebrate the resurrection of Jesus Christ with anus and vagina toys. :eek: Praise the Lord! -k hmmm… ---
**Author:** ![wolf\_meister](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolf_meister/32/15202_2.png) [@wolf\_meister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolf_meister)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 5:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/home-from-the-dollar-store-seriously-creeped-out/233394/55 "2004-03-11T05:39:29Z")
My Apologies **Mr Moto** Yes your posting #35 was way ahead of mine. I am always _very_ careful not to submit an “I’m surprised that no one…” posting until I have thoroughly checked the entire postings so far. I used IE’s “Edit find” for words such as “Bogart”, “Caine”, “Mutiny” and so on. Little did I know that the SDMB™ is filled with clever folks that don’t always come right out and make a “ton of bricks” reference as I usually do. Again, My Apologies **Mr Moto** ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Moto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9de0a6/32.png) [@Mr.Moto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Moto)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/home-from-the-dollar-store-seriously-creeped-out/233394/56 "2004-03-11T14:23:29Z")
No apologies needed, **wolf\_meister**. I was deliberately being vague to see if anybody out there didn’t get the joke. I see you got the joke, but missed the post. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/home-from-the-dollar-store-seriously-creeped-out/233394.md?page=2)