# Homophobia or not? Re: A Yahoo News Search **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [October 6, 2002, 6:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homophobia-or-not-re-a-yahoo-news-search/131043 "2002-10-06T06:55:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 5\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Jeremytt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/839c29/32.png) [@Jeremytt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jeremytt)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homophobia-or-not-re-a-yahoo-news-search/131043/21 "2002-10-10T02:27:58Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by trader\_of\_shots \* > \*\* > A pedophile is responding to a natural urge the same way a homosexual does right ? Is it is a unnatural urge ? In which case the Pedfophile is considered mentally Ill … but the homosexual is not ? > \*\* This argument isn’t even _vaguely_ parallel. One element involves consenting adults, and the other does not. One might say the \* consenting adults \* category can include homosexuality, S & M, copraphagia, bondage, etc. Sick to some, exciting to others. The second category would involve, along with pedophilia, rape, torture, etc, all kinds of sexual behavior that is universally frowned upon, which involves unwilling partners in one way or another. However, you have made an excellent point. Many Christians really do think THEY ARE helping the homosexual by converting him. They’re not necessarily “hate groups”. I know this because I’ve spoken with some of them. It’s well meant, if mis-guided, in my opinion. There are already too many suicides in the gay community. One thing that has occurred to me is that it seems like Christians and gays have 2 different definitions of homosexuality. To a Christian, homosexuality seems to denote sexual behavior, which can be stopped, or changed; focused in a different direction. By this definition, it really IS possible to change a gay. But to gay people, homosexuality seems to be defined by an identity; an orientation; a set of sexual feelings. I don’t think any gay can really change what they’re feeling. Thus, you find gays who are abstinate,(some for many years), married gays, and even gay virgins. This makes the whole argument between gays and Christians wasted time, because they’re really talking apples and oranges. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homophobia-or-not-re-a-yahoo-news-search/131043/22 "2002-10-10T03:03:56Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jeremytt \* > \*\* > One thing that has occurred to me is that it seems like Christians and gays have 2 different definitions of homosexuality. To a Christian, homosexuality seems to denote sexual behavior, which can be stopped, or changed; focused in a different direction. By this definition, it really IS possible to change a gay. > > But to gay people, homosexuality seems to be defined by an identity; an orientation; a set of sexual feelings. I don’t think any gay can really change what they’re feeling. Thus, you find gays who are abstinate,(some for many years), married gays, and even gay virgins. > > This makes the whole argument between gays and Christians wasted time, because they’re really talking apples and oranges. \*\* The ads by HarvestUsa and similiar organizations that I’ve seen promise ‘to free you from your homosexual desires.’ Many of these groups DO claim that they can change a persons orientation. Some of the fundie groups have presented a husband and wife who are both “ex gay”. ---
**Author:** ![dylan\_73](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecccb3/32.png) [@dylan\_73](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dylan_73)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homophobia-or-not-re-a-yahoo-news-search/131043/23 "2002-10-10T16:24:25Z")
Is it really bad to want to change your sexual orientation? What if I decided that I was too limited in my sexual partners and, even though I had no attraction to men, wanted to become bisexual? Or, perhaps my sex drive was interfering with my contemplation of the Universe; why not become asexual? Is it so wrong for me to want these things, or is it just wrong for someone to offer to service me. Uh, I mean offer me that service… ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homophobia-or-not-re-a-yahoo-news-search/131043/24 "2002-10-10T18:36:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by dylan\_73 \* > \*\*Is it really bad to want to change your sexual orientation? > Is it so wrong for me to want these things, or is it just wrong for someone to offer to service me. Uh, I mean offer me that service… \*\* It isn’t wrong to want physical immortality. It is wrong for Alex Chiu to claim he can provide it. ``` Wanting the impossible isn't a bad thing. Claiming you can provide the impossible is. I know of no verified case of an individual who has been "cured" of homosexuality. There is no verified method for doing such a thing. Indeed, some of the "exgay" spokesmen for these groups have turned up having sex in gay bars.( a cite will be provided-I know this has been mentioned in a few threads.) ``` ---
**Author:** ![Jeremytt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/839c29/32.png) [@Jeremytt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jeremytt)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homophobia-or-not-re-a-yahoo-news-search/131043/25 "2002-10-10T18:47:52Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by DocCathode \* > \*\* > > The ads by HarvestUsa and similiar organizations that I’ve seen promise ‘to free you from your homosexual desires.’ Many of these groups DO claim that they can change a persons orientation. Some of the fundie groups have presented a husband and wife who are both “ex gay”. \*\* No kidding! I wasn’t aware of this. In any case, I don’t think changing a person’s homosexual desires is a psychological possibility. As a post script, did you know they found that husband (who claimed to be ex-gay) in a gay bar in Washington DC? It was widely reported in the press. Some people can go through a whole lifetime lying to themselves. The power of denial in the human brain sometimes amazes me. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homophobia-or-not-re-a-yahoo-news-search/131043.md?page=1)