# Homosexuality is curable **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [November 30, 2015, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homosexuality-is-curable/739035 "2015-11-30T17:26:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![Robbins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f19dbf/32.png) [@Robbins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robbins)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2015, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homosexuality-is-curable/739035/123 "2015-12-06T18:57:42Z")
> [@Stoneburg](#): > > Thank you for the very positive feedback, I’m happy to see that someone appreciated the perspective, it was turning out to be quite a pile on… > > Now I did a google search and it turns out my idea may not be as controversial as I thought. Actually it seems self-evident once you start looking into yourself, but I guess that only holds true if you’re a heterosexual male yourself. I can quite clearly see now that my fear of intimacy with other males has shaped my behavior very significantly, but I am still exploring the exact nature of the different fears and taboos that come up. But the common denominator here is the fear/disgust an I’m now looking to deconstruct it all and see where it came from. > > The socio-cultural game seems to be based on domination/subjugation, where male-male sexuality (for heterosexuals) means a threat to their social status. Basically the male is afraid to be penetrated because that will (in the patriarch system) demote it (symbolically) to a female. Basically, if I let someone penetrate me I am showing submission, which means I am weak. Culturally this seems to have been supported in earlier eras where the “dominant” or “penetrating” male was sometimes not even considered “homosexual”; but only the “submissive” or “penetrated” was. I find this very easy to differentiate since there is a much bigger fear of one than the other, and one is associated with masculinity, the other with femininity. > > So you could argue that it’s not just a fear of other men, it is also the fear of “becoming a woman”. So I am a male afraid of other men on the outside (as in the exterior world) but also afraid of the femininity I may have repressed in myself (what if I like being penetrated?). Psycho-sexuality is super interesting. 🙂 Great post. Men are very hard on each other in many ways and in this way in particular. There is definitely a fear driven homophobia amongst men who identify as heterosexual. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2015, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homosexuality-is-curable/739035/124 "2015-12-06T19:07:48Z")
> [@Robbins](#): > > There is definitely a fear driven homophobia amongst men who identify as heterosexual. What is your evidence for this statement? ---
**Author:** ![Robbins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f19dbf/32.png) [@Robbins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robbins)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2015, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homosexuality-is-curable/739035/125 "2015-12-06T19:22:42Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > What is your evidence for this statement? > **[Study Reveals Homophobic Men Are, In Fact, More Likely To Be Gay](https://www.elitedaily.com/news/world/homophobic-men-aroused-gay-male-porn-surprised)** > > Does homophobia have anything to do with homosexual tendencies? > Apparently, the answer to this age-old question is an unabashed “yes.” A past study, published by the American Psychological Association, was designed to "investigate whether... > **[Why Straight Men Are Right to Be Afraid of Homosexuality](https://slate.com/human-interest/2014/01/what-is-homophobia-why-straight-men-are-right-to-be-afraid-of-homosexuality.html)** > > To be a homophobe in 2014 is, increasingly, to find oneself on the fast track to social scorn. In an environment of growing acceptance, we condemn... [http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/megasahd-touch-isolation-how-homophobia-has-robbed-men-of-touch/](http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/megasahd-touch-isolation-how-homophobia-has-robbed-men-of-touch/) > **[Homophobes Might Be Hidden Homosexuals](https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/homophobes-might-be-hidden-homosexuals/)** > > A new analysis of implicit bias and explicit sexual orientation statements may help to explain the underpinnings of anti-gay bullying and hate crimes ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2015, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homosexuality-is-curable/739035/126 "2015-12-06T19:47:20Z")
[Study Reveals Homophobic Men Are, In Fact, More Likely To Be Gay](http://elitedaily.com/news/world/homophobic-men-aroused-gay-male-porn-surprised/) - Says homophobic men are more likely to be gay. The opposite of your claim. [What is homophobia? Why straight men are right to be afraid of homosexuality.](http://www.slate.com/blogs/outward/2014/01/30/what_is_homophobia_why_straight_men_are_right_to_be_afraid_of_homosexuality.html) - Says men are afraid to have complex sexualities because they’re afraid \*of \*homophobes, not because they are homophobes. [http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/megasahd-touch-isolation-how-homophobia-has-robbed-men-of-touch/](http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/megasahd-touch-isolation-how-homophobia-has-robbed-men-of-touch/) - Lots of great stuff about Male Touch Isolation, but I don’t see a claim that “There is definitely a fear driven homophobia amongst men who identify as heterosexual.” Again, it says the opposite: “In America in particular, if a young man attempts gentle platonic contact with another young man, he faces a very real risk of homophobic backlash either by that person or by those who witness the contact.” He’s afraid \*of \*homophobes, not that he himself is homophobic out of fear. [Homophobes Might Be Hidden Homosexuals - Scientific American](http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/homophobes-might-be-hidden-homosexuals/) - Also says homophobic men are more likely to be gay, not straight. ---
**Author:** ![Robbins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f19dbf/32.png) [@Robbins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robbins)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2015, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homosexuality-is-curable/739035/127 "2015-12-06T20:53:17Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > [Study Reveals Homophobic Men Are, In Fact, More Likely To Be Gay](http://elitedaily.com/news/world/homophobic-men-aroused-gay-male-porn-surprised/) - Says homophobic men are more likely to be gay. The opposite of your claim. > > [What is homophobia? Why straight men are right to be afraid of homosexuality.](http://www.slate.com/blogs/outward/2014/01/30/what_is_homophobia_why_straight_men_are_right_to_be_afraid_of_homosexuality.html) - Says men are afraid to have complex sexualities because they’re afraid \*of \*homophobes, not because they are homophobes. > > [http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/megasahd-touch-isolation-how-homophobia-has-robbed-men-of-touch/](http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/megasahd-touch-isolation-how-homophobia-has-robbed-men-of-touch/) - Lots of great stuff about Male Touch Isolation, but I don’t see a claim that “There is definitely a fear driven homophobia amongst men who identify as heterosexual.” Again, it says the opposite: “In America in particular, if a young man attempts gentle platonic contact with another young man, he faces a very real risk of homophobic backlash either by that person or by those who witness the contact.” He’s afraid \*of \*homophobes, not that he himself is homophobic out of fear. > > [Homophobes Might Be Hidden Homosexuals | Scientific American](http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/homophobes-might-be-hidden-homosexuals/) - Also says homophobic men are more likely to be gay, not straight. “There is definitely a fear driven homophobia amongst men who identify as heterosexual.” First article. Men who identify as heterosexual and are homophobic are more likely to be homosexual than men who identify as heterosexual and are not homophobic. Second article. Men who identify as heterosexual are afraid to ‘shatter’ the label of straight because then they are automatically gay. “A brush with gayness erases the rest of the man’s sexuality… Homophobia, then, is precisely a fear, and one that these men are not at all foolish for entertaining.” Third article. As you have described. However, you cannot believe that every young man who identifies as heterosexual is afraid to touch other young men solely because he fears homophobes and is not homophobic himself. Forth article. As first. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2015, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homosexuality-is-curable/739035/128 "2015-12-06T22:45:45Z")
Prior its hyphenation in the OP, I never realized that “disease” was from “ease,” as in comfort, and the prefix “dis,” as in the original state has been changed to its opposite. Like “dis-enfranchised” means that a person who once could vote cannot any more, and “dis-combobulated” means that something that was combobulated is no more, whatever combobulated means. Not that it means anything beyond “I never thought of it like that.” No, wait, I recall receiving that revelation in 1975, too, and had merely forgotten. I guess I got no value out of the OP at all, since I basically skimmed it (TL;DR and all). Did notice something about getting blown by some guy named Zach. I hope it was Zach Efron rather than Zach Braff or Zach Galifianakis, because a guy needs SOME standards. ---
**Author:** ![Salvor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@Salvor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Salvor)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2015, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homosexuality-is-curable/739035/129 "2015-12-06T22:58:16Z")
If I could take a pill to turn me straight, I wouldn’t take it. Guys are great, The idea that I would remove that affinity and switch it to women has zero allure for me. ---
**Author:** ![Robbins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f19dbf/32.png) [@Robbins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robbins)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2015, 1:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homosexuality-is-curable/739035/130 "2015-12-07T13:21:06Z")
> [@Salvor](#): > > If I could take a pill to turn me straight, I wouldn’t take it. Guys are great, The idea that I would remove that affinity and switch it to women has zero allure for me. Of course it does. Because you do not know what that feels like. But, it shouldn’t make any difference. That’s the point. If you are attracted to the same sex, then fine. If you are attracted to the opposite sex, then fine. It is that area where we don’t seem to be allowed to be attracted to both that is difficult for men in particular. That whole once a homo always a homo and only a homo attitude. I’m not sure why it’s even there. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2015, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homosexuality-is-curable/739035/131 "2015-12-07T18:44:46Z")
> [@Robbins](#): > > It is that area where we don’t seem to be allowed to be attracted to both that is difficult for men in particular. That whole once a _homo_ always a _homo_ and only a _homo_ attitude. I’m not sure why it’s even there. (italics mine) _Really?_ ---
**Author:** ![Jonathan\_Chance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jonathan_chance/32/701_2.png) [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2015, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homosexuality-is-curable/739035/132 "2015-12-07T21:30:53Z")
> [@Robbins](#): > > Of course it does. Because you do not know what that feels like. But, it shouldn’t make any difference. That’s the point. If you are attracted to the same sex, then fine. If you are attracted to the opposite sex, then fine. > > It is that area where we don’t seem to be allowed to be attracted to both that is difficult for men in particular. That whole once a homo always a homo and only a homo attitude. I’m not sure why it’s even there. Robbins, that sort of language isn’t really acceptable here. Please try and avoid such in the future. ---
**Author:** ![GrumpyBunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bc8723/32.png) [@GrumpyBunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrumpyBunny)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2015, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homosexuality-is-curable/739035/133 "2015-12-07T22:59:19Z")
> [@Stoneburg](#): > > Both homosexuality and heterosexuality _can_ be viewed as a _ **dis-ease** _… I have never seen anyone who is legitimately educated in actual medical or psychological thinking use the term “dis-ease”. That little tag of quackery, “dis-ease”, worries me far more than your sexual proclivities. ---
**Author:** ![septimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/septimus/32/410_2.png) [@septimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/septimus)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2015, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homosexuality-is-curable/739035/134 "2015-12-08T14:10:56Z")
I just clicked on the thread. I see that OP is being roundly dismissed by the usual SDMB herd. I, OTOH, think there is some validity in his observation, though I’d have phrased it differently. Introspecting, I’ve wondered why I feel such strong sexual attraction to women who, after all, are very similar to men in many ways. Instead, I’m a sort of homophobe, repelled by the idea of sex with a man. It seems bizarre, but, scientifically, a reversed amino acid somewhere might “magically” reverse this preference! And note that the obvious physiology of sexual intercourse doesn’t necessarily enter into the attraction, since blowjobs are a major source of pleasure. IMHO, there is a certain homophobia more prevalent in the U.S. than in other countries. Many American men are very reluctant to hug or hold hands with each other, even in friendship. I wouldn’t use the word “disease” but this can be seen as a psychological deficiency. Contrast it with Thailand where hetero- and gay men are often candid with each other, and willing to joke about their sexualities. (Before the Board’s self-appointed expert on Western tourism in Thailand chimes in, let me stress I’m relating experience in rural Thailand where foreigners are rare.) My own particular fetish is that I’m attracted to extremely beautiful voluptuous women. On one or two occasions, I let a beautiful creature take me home who turned out to be my own gender. :eek: I confess that I was in such a good mood and found her so attractive I was happy to let the fellatio proceed. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/homosexuality-is-curable/739035.md?page=6)