# Horniest TV couple? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 9, 2003, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620 "2003-04-09T19:03:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Knighted\_Vorpal\_Sword](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ac91a4/32.png) [@Knighted\_Vorpal\_Sword](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knighted_Vorpal_Sword)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620/41 "2003-04-10T18:02:53Z")
Sam & Diane, _Cheers_. ---
**Author:** ![Knighted\_Vorpal\_Sword](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ac91a4/32.png) [@Knighted\_Vorpal\_Sword](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knighted_Vorpal_Sword)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620/42 "2003-04-10T18:07:43Z")
Or, perhaps Frank & Hot Lips on **M_A_S\*H**. Can you imagine the kids _they_ would have had? ---
**Author:** ![Fingolfin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eada6e/32.png) [@Fingolfin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fingolfin)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620/43 "2003-04-10T20:41:42Z")
**Mike & Carol Brady**! Duh! ---
**Author:** ![blowero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/41988e/32.png) [@blowero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blowero)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620/44 "2003-04-10T20:53:00Z")
Ponch & John. How about the Cleavers? They were always talking about it: “Ward, you were kind of rough on the Beaver last night.” ---
**Author:** ![widdershins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f0a364/32.png) [@widdershins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/widdershins)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620/45 "2003-04-11T03:19:03Z")
No fair picking on Barney and Andy, they were cousins. Then again the men in town spent waaaay to much time in Floyd’s barber shop for something to not be going on there. All those bachelors or men who rarely went home to wives (Howard Sprague, Floyd, Gomer, Goober, Otis). And you had to go to Mount Pilot to find an “action” or a hooker, since that was the big town. I would vote for the Addams, for all-time couple. Carla and Turk on _Scrubs_ may be in the running if the show lasts long enough. How many supply closets do you think they’ve done it in? Dan Fielding and anything in the greater NYC area could give Kirk a run for his money. ---
**Author:** ![rjung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/45deac/32.png) [@rjung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjung)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 7:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620/46 "2003-04-11T07:03:54Z")
Can I nominate Mr. and Mrs. Tribble? I mean, geez, they’re _born_ pregnant! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 10:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620/47 "2003-04-11T10:16:58Z")
C’mon, people, Frank and Joyce weren’t even the horniest couple on _Hill Street Blues_, that would be Grace Gardner and Sgt. Esterhaus. Honorable mention to: Steve and Susan on _Coupling_. Jessica Tate and Peter Campbell on _Soap_. Paul and Jaime Buchman on _Mad About You_ (They definitely qualify. On the first episode, they had sex in the kitchen while they had guests over for dinner.) ---
**Author:** ![Sauron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@Sauron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sauron)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620/48 "2003-04-11T13:17:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by widdershins \* > No fair picking on Barney and Andy, they were cousins. I take it you’ve never been to the Deep South. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620/49 "2003-04-11T14:37:27Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jeff Olsen \* > \*\*The two “teenage” couples in “That 70s Show.” \*\* Actually, the parents can give the kids a run for their money. Red & Kitty are quite active and when Bob & Midge were together they were at it a lot, too. I thought Red & Kitty were cute together but Bob & Midge, that was just creepy. I felt the same way Donna did when she talked about catching them in the act once. _shudder_ Hmm … maybe I watch this show too much? The local station has reruns on twice a night. Oh, and pick any random soap opera couple if you want horny. They never have jobs so they can do it all the time… and they do. ---
**Author:** ![Gundy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b782af/32.png) [@Gundy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gundy)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620/50 "2003-04-11T16:22:36Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Weird\_AL\_Einstein \* > \*\*The parents on “Malcom in the Middle”. \*\* I’ll third that. Remember the episode that opened with them fighting over the shower, when Hal called in sick? Or the one where Lois couldn’t have sex for some amount of time, and they ended up getting their lives totally in order? Those two are hilarious. Bless that show. ---
**Author:** ![gonzoron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a6a055/32.png) [@gonzoron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gonzoron)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620/51 "2003-04-11T19:23:13Z")
I think to beat Gomez and Morticia, you gotta mix and match: James Kirk and Mrs. Roper ---
**Author:** ![widdershins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f0a364/32.png) [@widdershins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/widdershins)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2003, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620/52 "2003-04-12T00:50:45Z")
Actually, **Sauron** , we are both Alabama residents. And I’ve known second cousins who have dated, and even in one case, first cousins who married. Still creeps me out to think about it. I just never got that vibe from Barney and Andy. Were Thelma Lou, Elly, and Helen Crump beards? Besides they had access to Otis, passed out drunk in the cell several nights a week. He had to earn those key privileges somehow. I still say something was going on in that barbershop, remember how outraged they were when Barbara Eden set up shop as a manicurist at Floyd’s? ---
**Author:** ![Linguini](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3ab097/32.png) [@Linguini](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Linguini)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2003, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620/53 "2003-04-13T04:30:02Z")
Morticia & Gomez Addams. The way he took her hand and kissed her wrist and up her arm… sensual… sexy…lust! ---
**Author:** ![irishgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/8edcca/32.png) [@irishgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/irishgirl)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2003, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620/54 "2003-04-13T12:39:46Z")
Buffy and Spike? i mean, for someone with no heartbeat, he was pretty horny, right? ---
**Author:** ![FairyDust](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ccd318/32.png) [@FairyDust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyDust)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2003, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620/55 "2003-04-13T16:59:12Z")
Julie and Gabe Kotter. ---
**Author:** ![FairyDust](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ccd318/32.png) [@FairyDust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyDust)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2003, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620/56 "2003-04-13T17:03:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by blowero \* > \*\* > > How about the Cleavers? They were always talking about it: “Ward, you were kind of rough on the Beaver last night.” \*\* 😃 😃 😃 I almost died laughing! ---
**Author:** ![Sauron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@Sauron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sauron)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2003, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620/57 "2003-04-14T13:55:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by widdershins \* > I just never got that vibe from Barney and Andy. Were Thelma Lou, Elly, and Helen Crump beards? I dunno. I absolutely love the show, and I’m still trying to figure out why Andy let Elly Walker get away and took up with Helen Crump. Talk about going from a Ferrari to a DeSoto. If Andy was actually gettin’ it on with Barney, that would explain why he didn’t care so much what his girlfriend looked like. It would also explain why the show started to suck (no pun intended) when Barney left. Warren just didn’t do it for Andy, despite his nascent leather tendencies. ---
**Author:** ![fessie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@fessie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fessie)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2003, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620/58 "2003-04-14T14:23:41Z")
hijack - Did you ever notice how Laurie Metcalf’s “Jackie” on Roseanne really drew from Don Knotts “Barney”? I think she was channeling him or something - especially during her law enforcement phase. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2003, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620/59 "2003-04-14T16:31:08Z")
After deep reflection (deeper than this thread deserves) I’ve come to the conclusion than Morticia seemed to always put Gomez off, whereas both Hal and Lois seemed ready to drop whatever they were doing and go at it. And since I never saw Furillo and Davenport sneak into a utility closet, I have to vote for Hal and Lois. Although Chandler and Monica on Friends (during the post-London courtship phase) could give anyone a run for the money. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2003, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620/60 "2003-04-14T18:27:36Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Linguini \* > \*\*Morticia & Gomez Addams. The way he took her hand and kissed her wrist and up her arm… sensual… sexy…lust! \*\* Indeed. Another vote here for Gomez and Morticia Addams. **kunilou** : one never got the feeling that Morticia was putting Gomez off for very long. 😛 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/horniest-tv-couple/167620.md?page=4)