I hate spiders also and became even worse after reading about brown recluse spiders. I suggest keeping a can of bug spray handy and make sure it is effective on spiders.
I had friend that was terrified of caterpillars. She actually wanted me to drive over to her house and kill a caterpillar on her back porch.
Guess they were smaller in sector 7G. 
Today I was called by some co-workers to deal with a wolf spider, with lots of shrieking and freaking out. Immediately after, I pointed them to a wee topical joke I’d hidden in the source code for this page. 
Perhaps in a belt holster, so the aerosol death is available at a moment’s notice? You know, like cops have. But, instead of pepper spray, you carry a can of Raid.
Food for thought.
Of course, failing that, you could always get a flamethrower for industrial-grade spider annihilation.
A couple of nights ago, at 2 or 3 in the morning, I was reading a book and from the corner of my eye I saw…something…skitter across the floor. I tried to get up to hunt it and/or kill it, but I don’t know where it went. I don’t know if it was a spider or some other creepy insect…for all I know it was a bizarre cat hair tumbleweed… it was big enough, though, at least the size of a toonie and long. I haven’t seen it since. I’m hoping the cats got it (or it was just a weird lump of fur), because I’m very creeped out at the possibility that it’s still hanging around the house!
When I go to that page, an awful lot of the text from your ASCII picture (ETA: and your little blurb, too!) shows up on the page itself. That might be a result of my plugins, but then again …
Gaah, you have my deepest sympathy. Let’s think about some rational remedies here. Do you have access to any sheets? I suggest tying sheets into a knotted rope and let yourself out of the building via the window.
When I was fresh at my first fulltime job, I went to make some copies and the machine wasn’t working. One of our salesmen came along and tried to figure out what was wrong. He crouched down, swung open the doors on the copier’s side, and a SNAKE undulated half out, straight towards his face, and flickered its snakey tongue at him. His jaw came as close to literally hitting the floor as I have ever seen and he scrabbled backwards in a fairly undignified way.
For the rest of the day, I had a difficult time sliding my legs under my desk. It was a very surreal day.
Sorry, I can’t find it. I’ve never been very good with easter eggs. A little help?
Spoiler it if you must.
Long, hairlike legs? Sounds like a house centipede.
Don’t worry - their bites (well, technically, stings) are not fatal, merely painful. 
I love this 1902 description:
Dang, I’d be fairly consternated, too.
In Firefox, at least, if you right-click on the page, you can select View Page Source from the pop-up menu. You can also check your View menu from the menu bar.
Bug spray seems of limited utility to me. Yeah, you can use to at points of ingress, but once you’ve seen the spider you can just step on it. Less anyone bring up arachnophobia, let me observe that spraying a visible spider involves bringing your face closer to it than stepping on it does. Plus you get the satisfying feeling of killing it with your own muscles.
Ta.
Very cool, Larry Mudd. 
Age. Toddlers are great for squishing spiders.
Oh god, I hope not. That thing is hideous! Though admittedly, it may have been…it was just too dark to tell, and it was movement off in the shadows. The window was open and a fan was blowing, so I keep telling myself it was just cat hair being blown across the floor (what, I haven’t vacuumed in a few days!) I don’t think I’ve ever seen such an insect in this apartment before (we are on the second floor, if it matters) though we did just recover a cooler from my parent’s garage…I’m guessing it may have hitched a ride in there.
I’m hoping it’s either dead on it’s own, killed by a cat or made it outside on it’s own. Though now I’m more terrified at the thought of it wandering around my apartment! :eek:
I just put the parasol back on our deck after staining it (the deck, not the parasol.) Lucky I thought of shaking it first before ducking under it to open it fully as THREE house centipedes fell out and whizzed off down the cracks of the deck. Shudder.
Milena Carella = swoon!
Shoe size, of course; it would be against board rules to have a 3.5yo Mod.
He probably got tired of the competition outside if your area is anything like mine.
This year the hedge spiders are going grazy. Whatever those ones that make dinner plate sized webs in the evergreen hedges outside the building are. There are usually about 15-20 in the 15 by 3 foot wide hedge in the front yard. but this year there are probably 50-60 on the thing, the bush is a lot more white than green this year.
I find spiders usually aren’t cooperative about being squashed and hang too close to the baseboards. My bug spray shoots out about 6 feet, which is fine for spiders and cockroaches. I can actually squash cockroaches with my bare hands, but I don’t think I could do that with a spider. I also has wasp and hornet spray that shoots out over 12 feet, but I don’t know if it works on spiders, but it’s great for wasp nests under my eaves.