# Hot Chicks: Goatees Are Just A Prop That You Fall For **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 19, 2004, 7:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hot-chicks-goatees-are-just-a-prop-that-you-fall-for/280622 "2004-12-19T07:22:05Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![FinnAgain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/finnagain/32/12500_2.png) [@FinnAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FinnAgain)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2004, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hot-chicks-goatees-are-just-a-prop-that-you-fall-for/280622/141 "2004-12-21T23:39:20Z")
> [@Giraffe](#): > > Naw, I’m just joshing you. You’re all right! Hey, how would a donkey felcher like you know anyways? (goats are so last year) Ah well, you know I luv ya. I think. Sorta. Well, I’d at least buy you a beer. **Cinnamon Girl** : Yes, yes I do kick ass. What, that’s not what you said? Could’ve sworn… ---
**Author:** ![sturmhauke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47c2d/32.png) [@sturmhauke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sturmhauke)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hot-chicks-goatees-are-just-a-prop-that-you-fall-for/280622/142 "2004-12-22T00:01:45Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > It takes a real man to admit that, especially out of context. Heh. ---
**Author:** ![SlyFrog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a3d4f5/32.png) [@SlyFrog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SlyFrog)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hot-chicks-goatees-are-just-a-prop-that-you-fall-for/280622/143 "2004-12-22T00:31:47Z")
> [@Certainly If You Please](#): > > In fact, I tried a goatee for awhile, out of frustration, and realized that I, too, had become a POSER! In effect, I was using a prop to blatantly attract young women to me. And that, dear young naive ladies, is all a goatee is (most of the time): A PROP! I assume that you at least got tons of ass during this period, to make up for the crushing feeling of being a poser and all. After all, you did have the goatee, which is clearly a "Gagging for It!"™ brand aphrodisiac. Actually I agree with a minor part of this; I just get sick and tired generally of everyone looking like a stereotypical clone. My personal peeve is the generic “frat boy” short and slightly spikey hair cut. At least the accompanying baseball cap appears to be slowly going out of style on all but the most hardcore. Of course at the same time, I also get sick of people who appear to need to look different from the norm just to look different from the norm. And then I (honestly) get sick of myself for: (i) giving a shit what anyone looks like; and (ii) feeling some need to judge people whatsoever on what their damn hair looks like. However, when I am on my “frat boy” rant days, I just think those people are sheep. I don’t care so much about whether they are regularly getting nailed. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hot-chicks-goatees-are-just-a-prop-that-you-fall-for/280622/144 "2004-12-22T01:07:18Z")
Nailing sheep. Yep. This is the Dope. ---
**Author:** ![look\_ninjas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b2d939/32.png) [@look\_ninjas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/look_ninjas)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hot-chicks-goatees-are-just-a-prop-that-you-fall-for/280622/145 "2004-12-22T01:14:27Z")
> [@NoClueBoy](#): > > I, however, have hairy feet. Every time I see a hot chick around here lately, they always seem to be dating a hobbit. What’s up with the attraction to hairy feet? Ladies, they’re just a [prop](http://www.alleycatscratch.com/lotr/makingem/Makeup/Feet/Orig/Pippin_hobbit_feet_2.jpg)! ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hot-chicks-goatees-are-just-a-prop-that-you-fall-for/280622/146 "2004-12-22T02:37:10Z")
Y’know, if a mere goatee is all that stands between me and the Hot Japanese Chicks though willing to compromise for hot Chinese, Latina, Jewish, Indian, Lebanese, Black, Rom, Irish, or whatever’s in season 😃 , then fuck yeah I’m using one as a damn prop. Hell I’ll even use an actual prop one from the Drama Club… 😛 In any case, unless I’m poaching among the undergrad population, the women I’m likely to be addressing _know_ that we will be putting up a display for the purposes of creating good first impressions. It’s bloody _expected_ of us, and I should hope _they are up to evaluating if we are posing or not_ and make their own damn decision. Just like the sober American-cut charcoal-grey suit with shined wingtips and dimpled tie, plus the well-rehearsed answer about how we saved our last boss a million, is just a prop to get a prospective employer to believe we’re consummate professionals so they’ll hire us on the spot. 🆒 (\*But still, damn you, goatee-guys, for harding all the HJC’s! 😉 ) ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hot-chicks-goatees-are-just-a-prop-that-you-fall-for/280622/147 "2004-12-22T02:41:19Z")
> [@me](#): > > (\*But still, damn you, goatee-guys, for harding all the HJC’s! 😉 ) Freudian slip. I meant the goateeboys are HOARDING the Hot Japanese Chicks. It’s obviously the latter that are “harding” the former. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Harborwolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Harborwolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harborwolf)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hot-chicks-goatees-are-just-a-prop-that-you-fall-for/280622/148 "2004-12-22T03:44:18Z")
> [@NoClueBoy](#): > > I, however, have hairy feet. > > 😃 Well, you’re a third of the way there. Just grow the goatee and get the bullethead and all of the women of the world shall be yours MUHUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH aaaaaHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAH Ah, good times. I should mention that for a while I had the shaved head and the goatee. Meshed pretty well with my bouncy personality. I was like a cheerful lil satan worshipper 😃 ---
**Author:** ![levdrakon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@levdrakon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/levdrakon)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hot-chicks-goatees-are-just-a-prop-that-you-fall-for/280622/149 "2004-12-22T03:55:51Z")
Goatee, lean abs, muscled torso… Mmmmm. ---
**Author:** ![Scissorjack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 7:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hot-chicks-goatees-are-just-a-prop-that-you-fall-for/280622/150 "2004-12-22T07:47:11Z")
> [@Harborwolf](#): > > Well, you’re a third of the way there. Just grow the goatee and get the bullethead and all of the women of the world shall be yours In the world? In the UNIVERSE! Just look at all the action Ming The Merciless was getting. ---
**Author:** ![FinnAgain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/finnagain/32/12500_2.png) [@FinnAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FinnAgain)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 8:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hot-chicks-goatees-are-just-a-prop-that-you-fall-for/280622/151 "2004-12-22T08:18:12Z")
> [@Case Sensitive](#): > > ust look at all the action Ming The Merciless was getting. Man, what a badass poseur. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Bird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Little\_Bird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Bird)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2004, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hot-chicks-goatees-are-just-a-prop-that-you-fall-for/280622/152 "2004-12-22T15:47:12Z")
Am I the only person who came into this thread because I read goatee as goatse? ---
**Author:** ![moriah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b2d939/32.png) [@moriah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moriah)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2004, 7:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hot-chicks-goatees-are-just-a-prop-that-you-fall-for/280622/153 "2004-12-23T07:39:05Z")
[Here’s the ultimate fucking goateed poser](http://www.awwshuks.com/photogal/keychainhairyharryballs.htm). ---
**Author:** ![SolGrundy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bbce88/32.png) [@SolGrundy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SolGrundy)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2004, 8:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hot-chicks-goatees-are-just-a-prop-that-you-fall-for/280622/154 "2004-12-23T08:31:36Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > I’ve tried clean shaven, and I’ve tried full beard, and the goatee is far and away the easiest facial hair configuration to maintain. I’ve just spent more time describing my facial hair maintenace in this post than I spend actually maintaining it in an average week. Testify! Before I became a convert, I just dismissed anything other than a full beard or clean-shaven as pure vanity. Why would a guy spend so much time carefully shaving his face to look like an armpit except unless he thought it made him look mondo sexy? Because it’s easiest, that’s why! The parts that make you look like a derelict, a child molester, an anime character, or Santa, you shave off, once every couple of days. The parts that are hardest to shave, you leave alone. Takes less than five minutes. I wish I’d clued into this sooner. (Which is becoming my mantra.) ---
**Author:** ![Kyyrewyyoae](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Kyyrewyyoae](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyyrewyyoae)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2004, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hot-chicks-goatees-are-just-a-prop-that-you-fall-for/280622/155 "2004-12-24T03:56:11Z")
> [@Anastasaeon](#): > > Oh, me! Me! > > I’ll never win, I just like to play. You can play; we just need to figure out what the equivalent level of leg hair would be. But you gotta give us odds. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2004, 6:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hot-chicks-goatees-are-just-a-prop-that-you-fall-for/280622/156 "2004-12-24T06:38:19Z")
> [@Little Bird](#): > > Am I the only person who came into this thread because I read goatee as goatse? I referenced goatse in some fashion back on page 2. I’m too lazy to go see what I said, however. But to answer your question: no. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hot-chicks-goatees-are-just-a-prop-that-you-fall-for/280622.md?page=7)