# How about some dull new names for U.S. cars? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 16, 2007, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216 "2007-01-16T18:05:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2007, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216/21 "2007-01-16T21:08:03Z")
[QUOTE=TheLoadedDog] The Toyota Dave. [/QUOTE] Left field, meet Head. _Gets up snickering_ ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2007, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216/22 "2007-01-16T21:09:50Z")
[QUOTE=Spoons] and a radio that pulls in both AM _and_ FM broadcasts. [/QUOTE] No doubt it’s either the acclaimed Blaupunkt Olathe or Blaupunkt Schaumburg car stereos. ---
**Author:** ![Auntbeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Auntbeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Auntbeast)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2007, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216/23 "2007-01-16T21:16:56Z")
Ford Bored Chevrolet Complacent Dodge Dull ---
**Author:** ![Hampshire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hampshire/32/4887_2.png) [@Hampshire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hampshire)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2007, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216/24 "2007-01-16T21:19:20Z")
The Ford Fucked-Us. (well, i guess focus is close enough) ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2007, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216/25 "2007-01-16T21:29:02Z")
Yugo Assprune ---
**Author:** ![Sonia\_Montdore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/90ced4/32.png) [@Sonia\_Montdore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sonia_Montdore)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2007, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216/26 "2007-01-16T21:32:32Z")
The Ford Filistyne The Chrysler Babbitt The Chevy Commonplace The Dodge Vulgarian The Honda Smug The Kia Lowbrow ---
**Author:** ![Beadalin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@Beadalin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beadalin)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2007, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216/27 "2007-01-16T21:38:36Z")
The Dodge Responsibility. ---
**Author:** ![Hugh\_Jass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/4da419/32.png) [@Hugh\_Jass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hugh_Jass)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2007, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216/28 "2007-01-16T21:43:21Z")
Ford Plebian Chevy Saltine Chrysler Haddock Dodge Lipton Honda Oatmeal Mitsubishi Mayonnaise Toyota Kenny G Don’t forget the new Wilford Brimley signature series SUV, the Sub-Urbane. ---
**Author:** ![Lamar\_Mundane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/85f322/32.png) [@Lamar\_Mundane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamar_Mundane)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2007, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216/29 "2007-01-16T21:45:44Z")
Volkswagon Ennui. ---
**Author:** ![anamnesis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eb8c5e/32.png) [@anamnesis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anamnesis)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2007, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216/30 "2007-01-16T21:52:37Z")
This thread might be more relevant if the current trend toward new vehicle names wasn’t slowly evolving to an alphanumeric model throughout the industry. In an effort to convey the same sort of engineering sophistication and nameless efficiency of cars from German manufacturers (i.e. BMW’s 1, 3, 5, 6, 7, Z3/Z4; Mercedes’ A, B, C, E, S, ML, SL, CL; Audi’s A4, A6, A8, TT, Q7, R8), we are seeing many carmakers are transitioning to the same sort of nomenclature. Japanese luxury divisions started the trend of emulating the Europeans years ago. Lexus made the LS, ES, GS, SC, RX, IS and will soon have a sophisticated sports car called the LF. Infiniti made the G20/G35, I30, J30, M30/45, Q45, and QX56. Acura has RSX, TL, RL, MDX and RDX. Cadillac was amongst the first of the domestics to go the alphanumeric route with CTS, XLR, STS, DTS and SRX. Lincoln, though struggling to bring fresher products to market, is in the process of following suit with MKZ, MKX and a new MKR concept rumored for production. Pontiac’s new models are transitioning to a new range whose names are reminiscent of Audi: G5 and G6, with the upcoming G8 to replace the Grand Prix and/or Bonneville in a year or two. Other alphanumeric notables include … Mazda: 323, 626, 929, RX-7 and RX-8. Saab: 900, 9000, 9-3, 9-5, and 9-7X. Jaguar: XK, XJ, S-Type (soon to be replaced by the stunning XF) and X-Type. Volvo: S40, S60, S80, V50, V70, XC70, XC90, C70, 240, 780, 850, 940. Yeah, they still name cars at Ford, Mercury, Chevy, Buick, Honda, Nissan, Toyota, and all their attached SUV divisions, but the whole naming exercise seems increasingly pointless because before long car names will cease to exist and the real challenge will be finding combinations of numbers and letters which haven’t already been used by another manufacturer. 🙂 That being said, I still rather like the sound of these: Honda Thrifster - a 150mpg hybrid with a kitchen blender for an engine mounted to a roadster body the size of a go-kart. Toyota Temperate - heals the environment through the use of a revolutionary drivetrain whose only exhaust byproducts consist of water, flower petals, baby foxes and cute little bunnies. Ford Failure - finally, a FoMoCo product named to meet its sales expections. Buick Annuity - for the well-invested retiree with a portfolio so nuanced they could afford a Rolls Royce, but don’t want the attention that comes with one. ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2007, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216/31 "2007-01-16T23:09:04Z")
The Buick Cushion The Pontiac Decals The Dodge Ramp The Saturn Getzyahome The Jeep Lumpy The Chevrolet Goldenroddo The Chrysler Storage Bins The Cadillac Recliner The Dodge Sphagnum The Ford Exwife The Lincoln Continence ---
**Author:** ![anamnesis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eb8c5e/32.png) [@anamnesis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anamnesis)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2007, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216/32 "2007-01-16T23:27:36Z")
[QUOTE=AskNott] The Lincoln Continence [/QUOTE] Now THAT’S clever. Very funny! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Sonia\_Montdore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/90ced4/32.png) [@Sonia\_Montdore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sonia_Montdore)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2007, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216/33 "2007-01-17T01:16:24Z")
The Ford Stodgy The Plymouth Pointless The Chrysler Mundane The Volvo Vapid The Olds Underwhelming The Mazda Bushleague ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2007, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216/34 "2007-01-17T01:19:25Z")
[QUOTE=anamnesis] This thread might be more relevant if the current trend toward new vehicle names wasn’t slowly evolving to an alphanumeric model throughout the industry. [/QUOTE] Then let’s try these: Ford Du11 Dodge B0-RE and the ultimate boring alphanumeric SUV name: The H0-Hummer ---
**Author:** ![Imasquare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Imasquare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Imasquare)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2007, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216/35 "2007-01-17T01:33:54Z")
Ford Insult Chevrolet Square ---
**Author:** ![Sapo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ec9cab/32.png) [@Sapo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sapo)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2007, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216/36 "2007-01-17T02:11:54Z")
Introducing the all new Expensia ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2007, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216/37 "2007-01-17T02:19:37Z")
Ford Putt Chevy Spud Lincoln Roadie BMW Meh Mazda Jart ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2007, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216/38 "2007-01-17T03:38:51Z")
The imports are going to get in on the act, I just know it… The Yugo I-dont. The Skoda Whatever. The Lada Snow But the domestics fight back (if that’s the right expression): The Buick Porthole The Chrysler Cluster The Ford Median The GM Lugnut ---
**Author:** ![Rubystreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Rubystreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rubystreak)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2007, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216/39 "2007-01-17T03:46:53Z")
Chrysler Plastica Nissan Styrofoam Plymouth Polyester Saturn Synthetica ---
**Author:** ![Black\_Train\_Song](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4da419/32.png) [@Black\_Train\_Song](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Black_Train_Song)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2007, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216/40 "2007-01-17T04:30:38Z")
The Chevy Recall The Ford Layoff The Dodge Don’t The Mercury Poison The Lincoln Log The Chrysler Plant [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-about-some-dull-new-names-for-u-s-cars/388216.md?page=3)