# How am I Driving? 1 800 EAT EXCREMATE! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 1, 2005, 2:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772 "2005-02-01T14:34:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Rufus\_Xavier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@Rufus\_Xavier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rufus_Xavier)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2005, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772/21 "2005-02-01T20:11:59Z")
Hows my speling? Call 1-800-FUKOFFF ---
**Author:** ![blowero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/41988e/32.png) [@blowero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blowero)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2005, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772/22 "2005-02-01T20:50:39Z")
> [@Legolamb](#): > > Well yeah, I’d hope so too, but it doesn’t seem like **Mr Roboto** ’s company are going out of there way to listen to his side of the story at the moment so that’s why I asked. No, you misunderstand me. I wasn’t questioning why you posted; I was literally offering my opinion that I “would hope” they do it that way. If the company’s policy is to only take action after a certain number of complaints, then having one complaint in his file isn’t necessarily anything to worry about. If they want to discipline him after only one complaint, AND won’t listen to his side of the story, then yeah - that’d be a problem. That would be a seriously fucked up way to run a company, though. ---
**Author:** ![blowero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/41988e/32.png) [@blowero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blowero)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2005, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772/23 "2005-02-01T20:53:42Z")
> [@Rufus Xavier](#): > > Hows my speling? Call 1-800-FUKOFFF How’s my math? Call 1-8000-FUCKYOU ---
**Author:** ![Legolamb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/4491bb/32.png) [@Legolamb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Legolamb)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2005, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772/24 "2005-02-01T21:27:15Z")
> [@blowero](#): > > No, you misunderstand me. I wasn’t questioning why you posted; I was literally offering my opinion that I “would hope” they do it that way. No, I did understand you correctly - we both think it shouldn’t be a big deal and in a sane company it wouldn’t be. I’m just making sure the OPs company _is_ a sane company. I’m obviously just not making myself particularly clear tonight (nothing new there, then 😉 ) ---
**Author:** ![blowero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/41988e/32.png) [@blowero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blowero)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2005, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772/25 "2005-02-01T21:57:59Z")
> [@Legolamb](#): > > I’m just making sure the OPs company _is_ a sane company. I know. ---
**Author:** ![Tenar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/35a633/32.png) [@Tenar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tenar)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2005, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772/26 "2005-02-01T23:50:33Z")
> [@Mr. Roboto](#): > > Bubba… > I’ve never driven 90 MPH in my lifetime. You can’t weave in and out of traffic in So. California unless you have a Death Wish & I know why the signals were installed on my steering column. I beleive the offended party was one of the Morons who persist to drive 55 MPH in the Fast Lane! I will usually go around these people ( weaving irratically in and out of traffic). Bogus! Although unpopular, going 55 mph in the fast lane is not illegal. If you got out from behind a car going 55, went on for a bit, then moved back into the lane, fine. If you got out from behind the car, passed it, then cut in right in front of the slow person’s front bumper in order to show contempt for said “Moron,” that’s another matter altogether. (Not saying that’s what happened. I’m just saying that if it is, my sympathies would be with the person who turned you in. And, no, I do not go 55 in the fast lane.) ---
**Author:** ![stegon66](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee59a6/32.png) [@stegon66](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stegon66)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2005, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772/27 "2005-02-01T23:59:12Z")
Just curious about these so-called “fast lanes.” I’ve never seen a fucking sign that says “Hey, this is the fast lane. It’s okay to speed here.” Or is it just wishful thinking on the part of leadfooted drivers? ---
**Author:** ![Loopydude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e56c9b/32.png) [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2005, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772/28 "2005-02-02T00:00:48Z")
sheit I been excremated ---
**Author:** ![Cheesesteak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cheesesteak/32/3694_2.png) [@Cheesesteak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheesesteak)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2005, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772/29 "2005-02-02T00:26:44Z")
> [@Tenar](#): > > Although unpopular, going 55 mph in the fast lane is not illegal. Many jurisdictions have a “stay right except to pass” law. What that means is that regardless of the speed you’re travelling, you can’t just sit your ass in the left lane, you have to be passing someone. That’s “stay right except to pass” period. Not “stay right except to pass or if you’re going the speed limit” or “stay right except to pass or just if you want to stop a leadfoot from speeding”. Are you passing someone at 55? Unlikely. ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2005, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772/30 "2005-02-02T00:41:19Z")
Excremated? OK. I **NOT** burning your dog! ---
**Author:** ![Loopydude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e56c9b/32.png) [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2005, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772/31 "2005-02-02T00:43:07Z")
Mah drivin is exrematious…rethpec mah athoritay!! ---
**Author:** ![MysteryFellow63427](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e4f/32.png) [@MysteryFellow63427](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MysteryFellow63427)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2005, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772/32 "2005-02-02T02:42:17Z")
> [@stegon66](#): > > Just curious about these so-called “fast lanes.” I’ve never seen a fucking sign that says “Hey, this is the fast lane. It’s okay to speed here.” Or is it just wishful thinking on the part of leadfooted drivers? Unofficial rules of the road. If someone goes the speed limit or below in the left lane of a multi-lane highway or urban freeway it really bottles up traffic. The pattern in my city on a three lane freeway is typically: Left lane : 5-15+ mph over Middle lane : 0-10 mph over Right lane : -5-0 mph under ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2005, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772/33 "2005-02-02T02:46:00Z")
“Excremate” is actually a disrespectful term for one’s spouse. “I woulda played 18 holes on Saturday, but the excremate made me clean up the garage.” ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Roboto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/76d3ee/32.png) [@Mr.Roboto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Roboto)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2005, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772/34 "2005-02-02T03:38:03Z")
Ino: I work for a well known Western Region Company. It’s possible someone with a beef with my company received sick retribution by turning me in. Jackmannii: not a trucker, I was driving a Volkswagon. Neuroman: The negative impact is the “cloud of suspicion” when I check-out a vehicle from the motor pool. Legolamb: This will not affect me in a direct way. I’ll just be the jackass of the month for getting turned in. Blowero: I was travelling at the speed of traffic, probably 70MPH at that time of day. The problem arises when slower traffic ignore staying in the right-hand lanes and gum up the left lanes. ---
**Author:** ![Rhubarb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/59ef9b/32.png) [@Rhubarb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhubarb)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2005, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772/35 "2005-02-02T03:44:52Z")
There are also laws against impeding the flow of traffic. A driver going below the posted speed limit in the left (passing) lane can be ticketed for this. In actual fact, my brother was given a warning for driving 5 over the limit when the rest of traffic was going 10-15 over, and he wasn’t even in the left lane. What the cop said to him was basically “Kid, if you don’t pick it up, you’re gonna cause a wreck and screw up everybody’s afternoon. Have a nice day.” (para-phrased due to memory lapse) ---
**Author:** ![blowero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/41988e/32.png) [@blowero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blowero)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2005, 8:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772/36 "2005-02-02T08:10:50Z")
> [@Mr. Roboto](#): > > Blowero: I was travelling at the speed of traffic, probably 70MPH at that time of day. The problem arises when slower traffic ignore staying in the right-hand lanes and gum up the left lanes. See, here’s what’s bugging me about your story: You don’t seem to actually _know_ how fast you were going. You say, “probably 70 mph”. Is it possible you were going faster than that? There’s a phenomenon in which one becomes accustomed to whatever speed one is moving, so that it no longer feels “fast”. So if you weren’t looking at your speedometer (and I can only assume you weren’t, since the only reference point you seem to have is the speed of the other traffic), you can’t really know how fast you were going. Maybe you were speeding just a teensy bit? :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Roboto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/76d3ee/32.png) [@Mr.Roboto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Roboto)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2005, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772/37 "2005-02-02T16:39:21Z")
Blowero; I recall HOV’s were passing me in the diamond lane so 70MPH would be accurate within 5 MPH. That would mean HOV’s were travelling in excess of 70. ---
**Author:** ![blowero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/41988e/32.png) [@blowero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blowero)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2005, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772/38 "2005-02-02T18:32:28Z")
> [@Mr. Roboto](#): > > Blowero; I recall HOV’s were passing me in the diamond lane so 70MPH would > be accurate within 5 MPH. How do you figure that? > [@](#): > > That would mean HOV’s were travelling in > excess of 70. So…? ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Roboto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/76d3ee/32.png) [@Mr.Roboto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Roboto)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2005, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772/39 "2005-02-03T02:13:43Z")
If I am traveling 70MPH in the furthest left lane and HOV or Carpool Vehicles are passing me in the Diamond or Carpool Lane (California) Obviously travelling slightly faster than I, They would be in excess of 70MPH. Is this Rocket Science? ---
**Author:** ![TellMeI\_mNotCrazy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tellmei_mnotcrazy/32/3419_2.png) [@TellMeI\_mNotCrazy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TellMeI_mNotCrazy)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2005, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772/40 "2005-02-03T02:58:36Z")
Well considering that you make it seem as though your estimate of your own speed was based on the fact that HOV drivers were passing you, it’s hardly clear cut. And if that wasn’t your point, then why mention them at all? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-driving-1-800-eat-excremate/287772.md?page=3)