# How am I so special **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 3, 2018, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225 "2018-07-03T13:27:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Lucas\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lucas_jackson/32/303_2.png) [@Lucas\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucas_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2018, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225/1 "2018-07-03T13:27:47Z")
A friend of mine recently called me and asked for my help. Specifically he asked me: “Luke, I need some help and you are literally the one person on earth that can help me.” I assumed he was speaking hyperbolically, he assured me he was not. Before he asked me, I could not imagine what I and I alone could help him with. But after he asked, I realized he was right. I am not a famous or particularly talented person. I don’t own any one of a kind items. This is an old, close friend but one who I see only a few times a year these days. I’m sure there might be several possible answers to this question but I could think of just this one. Can you guess what it might be? Note: this is not a hypothetical, it actually happened. ---
**Author:** ![Alpha\_Twit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alpha_twit/32/265_2.png) [@Alpha\_Twit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alpha_Twit)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2018, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225/2 "2018-07-03T13:31:51Z")
INHO - Most probable answer for why and “old, close friend” would contact you for help is your shared history along with a sense of trust that history creates. It has nothing to do with what you CAN do. It’s what your friend think you will do, probably discretely and with few questions asked. ---
**Author:** ![Lucas\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lucas_jackson/32/303_2.png) [@Lucas\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucas_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2018, 1:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225/3 "2018-07-03T13:35:59Z")
Wow, that’s actually on the right path. Nice job. But it is something he asked me to physically do. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2018, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225/4 "2018-07-03T13:41:18Z")
Drive the getaway car? ---
**Author:** ![Alpha\_Twit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alpha_twit/32/265_2.png) [@Alpha\_Twit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alpha_Twit)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2018, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225/5 "2018-07-03T13:41:59Z")
If you ask me to extract cricket bat splinters from your ass, that’s something you want me to physically do. You would probably prefer that I do it discretely and with few questions. I’m not your friend and I ask questions. We need the whole story. ---
**Author:** ![Stana\_Claus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stana_claus/32/13874_2.png) [@Stana\_Claus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stana_Claus)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2018, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225/6 "2018-07-03T14:07:58Z")
Perhaps dig up a time capsule sort of thing you buried together sometime in your youth? Or retrieve an item that was otherwise hidden away in a place that only you would know about? ---
**Author:** ![Defensive\_Indifference](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/defensive_indifference/32/6502_2.png) [@Defensive\_Indifference](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Defensive_Indifference)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2018, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225/7 "2018-07-03T14:21:04Z")
> [@Stana\_Claus](#): > > Or retrieve an item that was otherwise hidden away in a place that only you would know about? He asked \*\*Lucas \*\*to move the body to a new shallow grave. Or, \*\*Lucas \*\*is the only one with access to a safe deposit box or some such, and the friend gave him something for safekeeping years ago. ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2018, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225/8 "2018-07-03T14:52:21Z")
Impregnate his wife? ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2018, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225/9 "2018-07-03T16:19:21Z")
Donate a kidney since you are the only known tissue match. ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2018, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225/10 "2018-07-03T16:25:50Z")
Plant your fingerprints and DNA at a crime scene? ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2018, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225/11 "2018-07-03T16:29:20Z")
**Alpha Twit** : It’s “discreetly” if you mean “with discretion.” If you mean “separately,” then “discretely” would be correct. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2018, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225/12 "2018-07-03T16:49:17Z")
I can just about guarantee it will be unpleasant, whatever it is. ---
**Author:** ![TreacherousCretin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treacherouscretin/32/476_2.png) [@TreacherousCretin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TreacherousCretin)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2018, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225/13 "2018-07-03T16:53:12Z")
I’m thinking of an old joke about a rattlesnake bite in a sensitive area with the punchline “Doctor says you gonna die.” ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2018, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225/14 "2018-07-03T16:55:12Z")
No, it’s a well established protocol that BOTH keys are needed to launch those missiles. ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2018, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225/15 "2018-07-03T17:06:09Z")
> [@Alpha\_Twit](#): > > INHO - Most probable answer for why and “old, close friend” would contact you for help is your shared history along with a sense of trust that history creates. It has nothing to do with what you CAN do. It’s what your friend think you will do, probably discretely and with few questions asked. Like wire money to them in a foreign country because they got mugged and need to buy new airplane tickets. ---
**Author:** ![Lucas\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lucas_jackson/32/303_2.png) [@Lucas\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucas_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2018, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225/16 "2018-07-03T19:28:12Z")
All good guesses that I probably wouldn’t have thought of. What happened was he had told someone he was camping with me when in reality he was somewhere he shouldn’t have been and needed an alibi. He wanted me to send him photos of a camping trip we had taken together years ago. I didn’t and wished him well. ---
**Author:** ![Defensive\_Indifference](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/defensive_indifference/32/6502_2.png) [@Defensive\_Indifference](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Defensive_Indifference)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2018, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225/17 "2018-07-03T19:51:10Z")
> [@Lucas\_Jackson](#): > > All good guesses that I probably wouldn’t have thought of. > > What happened was he had told someone he was camping with me when in reality he was somewhere he shouldn’t have been and needed an alibi. He wanted me to send him photos of a camping trip we had taken together years ago. > > I didn’t and wished him well. Oh, that’s a good one. Was the “someone” his wife? And how did he take it when you refused to give him the pictures? Also, if the pics were taken years ago, were they useful? “Hey Hon, I was camping with Luke last week, I swear. See, here are these pics of us… No! My hair always grows out and I lose 20 pounds whenever I go camping! Damndest thing!” ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2018, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225/18 "2018-07-03T20:01:41Z")
He wanted you to lie for him? I might have done it…for a price.😉 ---
**Author:** ![Lucas\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lucas_jackson/32/303_2.png) [@Lucas\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucas_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225/19 "2018-07-04T00:37:10Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > He wanted you to lie for him? I might have done it…for a price.😉 Ha ha. Well it was for a woman. The problem was I was also friends with her so I would have felt bad being complicit in the lie. I hadn’t seen him in 6 months or so, so no idea if he would have matched the old photos. I’m sure he knew it was a dodgy ask when he did it. ---
**Author:** ![74westy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/74westy/32/3950_2.png) [@74westy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/74westy)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2018, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225/20 "2018-07-05T14:53:18Z")
Did you at least consider blackmailing him? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-am-i-so-special/817225.md?page=2)