# How bad does a crime have to get before you'd be willing to turn a friend or loved one in for it? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 26, 2015, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-bad-does-a-crime-have-to-get-before-youd-be-willing-to-turn-a-friend-or-loved-one-in-for-it/710964 "2015-01-26T23:57:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 8\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2015, 7:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-bad-does-a-crime-have-to-get-before-youd-be-willing-to-turn-a-friend-or-loved-one-in-for-it/710964/41 "2015-01-29T07:36:10Z")
> [@No\_umlaut\_for\_U](#): > > I was wondering about a crime like DUI. Most families have a problem drinker. That’s a case where there’s a huge difference between driving home from the neighborhood tap and running over a child. But it’s a situation where you hope they get caught before the latter happens. I prefer more than “hope” - DUI is a reportable crime in-and-of-itself, as far as I’m concerned ---
**Author:** ![DoggyDunnit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/5fc32e/32.png) [@DoggyDunnit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DoggyDunnit)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2015, 8:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-bad-does-a-crime-have-to-get-before-youd-be-willing-to-turn-a-friend-or-loved-one-in-for-it/710964/42 "2015-01-29T08:19:30Z")
When it comes to family, it’d depend on if I liked them or couldn’t stand them. If the former, my lips are as sealed shut as a nun’s legs\*. If the latter, I’ll turn them in in a New York minute for so much as a Class B misdemeanor. Friends: depends on the nature of the crime, the motive, and a random combination of several other factors. For example, if I knew a friend stole from someone/harmed someone who had it coming to them, I’d not turn them in. But if they, say, robbed an innocent old lady or something, I’ll land them in the county clink so fast their head’ll swim. 🙂 If a friend turns out to be a fake friend, or decides there’s an “expiration date” on our friendship, then any and all criminal acts immediately get reported to the cops, unless the statute of limitations has passed. Others: I actually have, on several occasions, witnessed crimes in progress. Several car burglaries, a motorcycle theft, a bicycle theft, a car theft, several graffiti-ers, and several “smashy-smashy” vandals. Didn’t report any of them, because, frankly, I couldn’t bring myself to care. I’ve found most people are assholes, so while the criminal is definitely an asshole, the victim’s probably an asshole, too. So, meh. - Certain crimes, though, like animal abuse, rape, victimizing **anyone** innocent, and crimes against my person, I will ALWAYS report. ---
**Author:** ![Lowdown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c57346/32.png) [@Lowdown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lowdown)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2015, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-bad-does-a-crime-have-to-get-before-youd-be-willing-to-turn-a-friend-or-loved-one-in-for-it/710964/43 "2015-01-29T20:08:27Z")
Abuse, rape, treason, embezzling. Probably murder, but it would depend on the victim and circumstances. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2015, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-bad-does-a-crime-have-to-get-before-youd-be-willing-to-turn-a-friend-or-loved-one-in-for-it/710964/44 "2015-01-29T21:11:00Z")
> [@Squall Winds](#): > > When it comes to family, it’d depend on if I liked them or couldn’t stand them. If the former, my lips are as sealed shut as a nun’s legs\*. If the latter, I’ll turn them in in a New York minute for so much as a Class B misdemeanor. > > Friends: depends on the nature of the crime, the motive, and a random combination of several other factors. For example, if I knew a friend stole from someone/harmed someone who had it coming to them, I’d not turn them in. But if they, say, robbed an innocent old lady or something, I’ll land them in the county clink so fast their head’ll swim. 🙂 > > If a friend turns out to be a fake friend, or decides there’s an “expiration date” on our friendship, then any and all criminal acts immediately get reported to the cops, unless the statute of limitations has passed. > > Others: I actually have, on several occasions, witnessed crimes in progress. Several car burglaries, a motorcycle theft, a bicycle theft, a car theft, several graffiti-ers, and several “smashy-smashy” vandals. Didn’t report any of them, because, frankly, I couldn’t bring myself to care. I’ve found most people are assholes, so while the criminal is definitely an asshole, the victim’s probably an asshole, too. So, meh. > > - Certain crimes, though, like animal abuse, rape, victimizing **anyone** innocent, and crimes against my person, I will ALWAYS report. How do you determine innocense? For that matter, innocent of what? ---
**Author:** ![handsomeharry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9c0ed/32.png) [@handsomeharry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handsomeharry)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2015, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-bad-does-a-crime-have-to-get-before-youd-be-willing-to-turn-a-friend-or-loved-one-in-for-it/710964/45 "2015-01-29T22:12:11Z")
> [@Isamu](#): > > I don’t turn in friends or family, for anything. I’d like to think that I’d be the same. Well, on the friends portion, I could be more flexible, but, probably not much. ---
**Author:** ![handsomeharry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9c0ed/32.png) [@handsomeharry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handsomeharry)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2015, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-bad-does-a-crime-have-to-get-before-youd-be-willing-to-turn-a-friend-or-loved-one-in-for-it/710964/46 "2015-01-29T23:01:32Z")
> [@Scumpup](#): > > I wouldn’t turn him in. I would bury him. This’ll work. ---
**Author:** ![OffByOne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/45deac/32.png) [@OffByOne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OffByOne)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2015, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-bad-does-a-crime-have-to-get-before-youd-be-willing-to-turn-a-friend-or-loved-one-in-for-it/710964/47 "2015-01-30T16:45:24Z")
If my wife murdered her ex-husband, I would turn her in – for **robbing** me of the pleasure. JK Seriously, though, if it were my child and under the age of 18, I would offer to let him/her turn him/herself in and make restitution, otherwise, I will call the police myself. Hopefully, though, I would have been observant enough to have let it get that far in the first place, since it is my responsibility to raise the child to fit into society, not victimize it. Like others have said, it is highly conditional. For instance, if my wife **did** kill her ex, it would be a Good Thing ™, and I would do everything in my power to help her get away with it. Hell, I probably would have been involved, anyway (my wife loves me!). On the other hand, if she killed a neighbor because he wouldn’t stop hitting on her, I would know that something very basic inside her had changed, not for the better, and she would really need to be put away, because I know she is a danger to others, possibly even me. ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Zappa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Mama\_Zappa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Zappa)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2015, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-bad-does-a-crime-have-to-get-before-youd-be-willing-to-turn-a-friend-or-loved-one-in-for-it/710964/48 "2015-02-06T16:12:58Z")
> [@Marion\_Wormer](#): > > 1. Theft and murder are two crimes I’m down on. If by white collar crime you mean something like massive frauds that steal people’s entire life savings, especially if it destroys the savings of the elderly and retired, I’d turn my own child in for that. The reason is that by destroying lives the perpetrator ends up causing early deaths, suicides, the destruction of families, and even the destruction of the fabric of society. Fraud and corruption on a big enough scale is a kind of societal murder. I’m really, really down on corrupt judges. I’m not related to any, but those judges that took bribes to put kids in for profit prisons, I’d turn one in in a heart beat even if I was married to him. > > 2. Regular murder, like killing someone and asking me to provide an alibi, only an idiot would ask that. I’d drop the dime on him as soon as I could get alone with my phone. > > 3. Assault, sexual abuse, B&E etc. If your friend/relative will do it to someone else, they’ll do it to you. Show no mercy. > > 4. Recreational drug use. Keep it out of my house and don’t drive stoned, that’s all I ask. And don’t do it in my presence or tell me about it. +1, except the last. Does this person have kids? Is this person likely to get pregnant? Is this person a caregiver of any kind? Dime dropped. Is there an addiction at play? Then force into rehab or cut ties. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-bad-does-a-crime-have-to-get-before-youd-be-willing-to-turn-a-friend-or-loved-one-in-for-it/710964.md?page=2)