# How Badly Could a Lobster Hurt Me? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [August 29, 2011, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489 "2011-08-29T13:43:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2011, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489/21 "2011-08-30T01:00:24Z")
> [@Gorsnak](#): > > You don’t wanna piss them off, or they’ll encase your feet in concrete and toss you into the Hudson. You miss **lobstermobster** too, eh? ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Romeo\_and\_Whatsherface](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8797f3/32.png) [@Romeo\_and\_Whatsherface](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Romeo_and_Whatsherface)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2011, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489/22 "2011-08-30T01:24:16Z")
OK, I gotta add this to the discussion. About 15 years ago, I heard on the news (ABC radio) that a guy tried to shoplift a lobster from a grocery store (don’t recall where) by putting it down the front of his pants. You can see where this is headed, can’t you? Yep, one claw band came off. He collapsed in agony before he got out of the store. So HIS answer to the OP question would be, “A lot!” Is that a lobster, or are you just happy to see me?🙂 ---
**Author:** ![brossa](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/brossa/32/3040_2.png) [@brossa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brossa)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2011, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489/23 "2011-08-30T04:14:25Z")
Did-a-chick? Dum-a-chum? Dad-a-cham? ---
**Author:** ![boytyperanma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4491bb/32.png) [@boytyperanma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boytyperanma)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2011, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489/24 "2011-08-30T04:21:14Z")
If you happen to be a gunslinger they will sneak up on you chop off a few fingers and leave you poisoned. It’s a shitty way to wake up. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2011, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489/25 "2011-08-30T04:22:00Z")
That was a bit dark, **brossa**. ---
**Author:** ![Isamu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/7c8e57/32.png) [@Isamu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isamu)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2011, 6:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489/26 "2011-08-30T06:25:25Z")
[phoebe] If it’s really your true lobster and then one day you find it’s run off with some shrimp, you could be badly hurt.[phoebe] ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2011, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489/27 "2011-08-30T14:04:58Z")
Small Hijack … > [@anson2995](#): > > …I worked in a seafood kitchen when I was in high school, and that cured me of any interest in eating seafood until I was in my 40s. Ok, why? Was it just that you were tired of dealing with the stuff, or did you learn something about food safety or sanitation that scared you off, or endangered species / ecological concerns or ??? I have no experience in this area and am genuinely curious. No agenda here. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2011, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489/28 "2011-08-30T14:11:33Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > Small Hijack …Ok, why? Was it just that you were tired of dealing with the stuff, or did you learn something about food safety or sanitation that scared you off, or endangered species / ecological concerns or ??? > > I have no experience in this area and am genuinely curious. No agenda here. My time cooking seafood actually increased my love of eating fish/shellfish/etc. However, I prefer to purchase and cook my own. I worked in a fairly upscale restaurant and was amazed at the waitstaff contests designed to move fish that was going bad. ---
**Author:** ![Enilno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/58f4c7/32.png) [@Enilno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enilno)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2011, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489/29 "2011-08-30T14:24:58Z")
> [@Mangetout](#): > > Concentrated along the comparatively narrow edge of the lobster’s pincer, I’d say that’s enough force to sever a finger, if it catches you at a joint, rather than the middle of a bone. As **Labrador Deceiver** mentioned lobsters have two types of claws, and the figures from that cite only applies to the crusher claw, which is described as having rounded, molar shaped ridges. The seizer claw has sharper serrated edges, but is smaller, and being composed of fast twitch fibers won’t be able to generate as much force. I’m sure both would hurt, and the seizer claw can probably cut you pretty bad, but even through a joint I doubt it’s strong or sharp enough to sever a finguer. ---
**Author:** ![anson2995](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c77e96/32.png) [@anson2995](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anson2995)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2011, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489/30 "2011-08-30T18:05:32Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > Small Hijack …Ok, why? Was it just that you were tired of dealing with the stuff, or did you learn something about food safety or sanitation that scared you off, or endangered species / ecological concerns or ??? Part of it’s taste, I guess – I don’t care for the texture of scallops, clams, etc. Part of it was dealing with live crabs and lobsters. I was squeamish about eating something that had been crawling around five minutes ago. Especially since they’re all fighting back. Having to pull out cracked crabs or dead lobsters from a box or from the tank was disgusting – when they die, they turn pretty quickly and the smell is horrible. Shrimp were an incredible pain to clean and prep, and I guess that alleviated me of any feeling that shrimp were a great treat to eat. Never had a problem cleaning fish, and even though I thought catfish were dirty and disgusting, I had no problem eating one. ETA: If I had to catch and kill chickens, I probably wouldn’t be eating that either. ---
**Author:** ![Lukeinva](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lukeinva/32/17872_2.png) [@Lukeinva](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lukeinva)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2011, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489/31 "2011-08-30T18:12:32Z")
Kind of a hijack but… do lobsters use their claws to eat with? Must be sloppy eaters if they do. ---
**Author:** ![user\_hostile](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/user_hostile/32/474_2.png) [@user\_hostile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/user_hostile)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2011, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489/32 "2011-08-30T18:27:33Z")
A løøbster ønce pinched my sister ---
**Author:** ![Colophon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f05b48/32.png) [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2011, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489/33 "2011-08-30T18:51:34Z")
> [@Johnny\_L.A](#): > > I think of that song every time I cross the Nooksack River – which is several times a week. I’d say a lobster could do some serious damage if it nipped you in the Nooksack. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2011, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489/34 "2011-08-30T20:19:07Z")
> [@user\_hostile](#): > > A løøbster ønce pinched my sister The person responsible for this post has been sacked. ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Torque](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2011, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489/35 "2011-08-30T20:30:46Z")
> [@Labrador\_Deceiver](#): > > One thing nobody has mentioned is the fact that lobsters have two different types of claws. One is a crusher, the other is a seizer. One has slow twich muscle fiber, the other, fast-twitch. I’d imagine it would depend on which one got you. What if it’s [THIS claw](http://www.cracked.com/article_17612_the-6-most-badass-murder-weapons-in-animal-kingdom_p2.html)? [Warning: Pistol Shrimp] ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Excellent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f19dbf/32.png) [@Mr.Excellent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Excellent)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2011, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489/36 "2011-08-30T20:32:33Z")
> [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](#): > > The person responsible for this post has been sacked. Nø, seriøusly! It wøs tøø big, and pinched her little tøe right øff! ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2011, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489/37 "2011-08-30T20:38:37Z")
> [@Enilno](#): > > As **Labrador Deceiver** mentioned lobsters have two types of claws, and the figures from that cite only applies to the crusher claw, which is described as having rounded, molar shaped ridges. The seizer claw has sharper serrated edges, but is smaller, and being composed of fast twitch fibers won’t be able to generate as much force. > > I’m sure both would hurt, and the seizer claw can probably cut you pretty bad, but even through a joint I doubt it’s strong or sharp enough to sever a finguer. The crusher claw has a single ridge along each of the facing edges - this doesn’t have perfect occlusion all along its length, but it’s not a particularly broad crushing surface like molars or a nutcracker - more like ragged, blunt, slightly interlocking incisors - seems narrow enough to me to be able to separate a joint, if it closed right on the knuckle. [![](http://static5.depositphotos.com/1032932/423/i/950/depositphotos_4230889-Crusher-Claw.jpg) ](http://static5.depositphotos.com/1032932/423/i/950/depositphotos_4230889-Crusher-Claw.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489/38 "2011-08-31T02:49:22Z")
I didn’t know that lobsters had 2 different claws. Amazing the facts you learn here. Are they always the same left vs right, or are some lobsters left-crushered and others right-crushered? If so, is that a species-level variation or a individual-level variation? **anson2995** : thanks for the response. ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489/39 "2011-08-31T02:55:44Z")
> [@Isamu](#): > > [phoebe] If it’s really your true lobster and then one day you find it’s run off with some shrimp, you could be badly hurt.[phoebe] 😃 ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489/40 "2011-08-31T13:45:59Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > I didn’t know that lobsters had 2 different claws. Amazing the facts you learn here. > > Are they always the same left vs right, or are some lobsters left-crushered and others right-crushered? If so, is that a species-level variation or a individual-level variation? > > **anson2995** : thanks for the response. You’ll see both left & right handed lobsters of the same species. It’s actually an environmental thing - a very young lobster has undifferentiated claws, but the one they start using for crushing becomes the crusher - researchers have controlled which claw becomes the crusher in the lab by preventing lobsters from using the other one. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-badly-could-a-lobster-hurt-me/594489.md?page=3)