How Badly Could a Lobster Hurt Me?

Unlike Batman, lobsters are least dangerous once they’ve been prepared.

You and user_hostile have the same sister, or you were just there to see it happen? :dubious:

The love story of Harry and Sally (Harry was a lobster, Sally was a crab)

all together now, singing…

Crabs walk sideways and lobsters walk straight, and that’s why they won’t let me take you as my mate!

Anecdotal but I was watching a cooking show (Masterchef Australia) and some contestants were allowed to hang with one of the best seafood chefs in Australia. The chef was describing a number of different crustaceans (which he had on hand and many of them live) and noted, while holding a Mudcrab, to be very careful. He explicitly said it could remove a finger if you were not careful.

Hyperbole? Maybe but I doubt it.

I think if those claws got a good snap on your finger you may well lose the finger. At the least you will have a very serious break (not fracture but break) and be bumming for a few months while it heals.

Hurt like hell too, didn’t it? :eek: First time I ever got nabbed by a Blue crab I made the horrible (and very painful) mistake of “slinging” it off. Ripped both sides of my index finger clear down to the bone,
and the crab that got me was only about 2-1/2" to 3" across the shell from side to side.
(Trust me, you’ll only make that mistake once in your lifetime.)
JSYK, the best (only?) way that I know of to get a Blue crab to let go immediately is to place it on the ground and either you or someone else stomp on it, hard enough to pulverize it. The claw muscles will relax instantly.
(Not to mention you won’t have to risk getting pinched by the other claw, while trying to disengage the first one.) :wink:

Depends on how much you were in love with the lobster at the time you caught it cheating on you.

If someone is sleeping nude, and someone else slips a live Alaskan king crab into the bed, what sort of mayhem could result?

Need answer fast.

Easy.

Get out of bed and start boiling some water.

Enjoy!

Well, that’s no fun. :frowning:

A bad case of crabs?

Under da sea!
Under da sea!
Stealing a crustacian…
can lead to castration!
Under da sea!
:smiley:

Can anybody meaningfully distinguish between a crabs claw and a lobsters in terms of strength? It’s just that big crabs seem to have no problem breaking each other (read : hard shelled exterior) into little bits. Not sure a finger is going to stand up to that kind of abuse any better, but a bite from a lobster I wouldn’t know about. I suppose the question to answer it would be ‘can any species of lobster predate on crabs?’

Maine lobster can and do predate on crab & other lobster with wild abandon. One of the reasons they band lobster claws is to prevent lobsters from killing each other in the tank. I’ve caught lobster while scuba diving and had them crack each other’s shells in the catch bag before I got them out of the water.

The thing is, even though exoskeletons are strong, they’re thin. So the strength & range of motion required to crack an exoskeleton is different than that required to break & sever a finger.
When a lobster breaks another animals shell with it’s claw, it’s basically grabbing both sides of a thin shell and squeezing them against each other. Like squeezing a very strong egg with a pair of pliers. But a finger bone is smaller, denser, and thicker, so the same tool might be able to crack/break the bone, but I don’t think it could sever it.

If you have a shellfish allergy, he could kill you.

But if their claws are rubber-banded when it happens, you’d be fine :).

Quick story;

While in Bali, went out for a seafood dinner, with another couple. We got a late start and the pickings were slim, by the time we reached the restaurant. One couple wanted Newburg, one garlic butter. The waiter comes and says we have a single lobster that will feed all four of you(:eek:), we can split it and cook each half, to suit.

It was very yummy, and very, very big! I kept thinking, if I saw this thing, when I was snorkeling, I’d get out of the damn ocean! (And maybe stay out for a couple of days!)

I’m certain it could have snapped off a finger without a second thought.

I wonder what the biggest lobster is they’ve ever caught, cause I got the impression the one I saw/ate wasn’t even close!

I lived in Vegas through the 80s & early 90s. At that time there was a bus-stop ad for a local gourmet room. It was on probably half the bus shelters in the city. It showed a smiling waiter in a tux holding up a lobster with one claw in each hand held at neck level shoulder-width apart and the tail down at his cummerbund.

This was pre-PhotoShop. Sure it *coulda *been a photo composite done by an artist, or a plastic lobster, or a 4’ midget waiter. But the overall effect looked very real. Apparently at least some do get huge if they live long enough and are well-fed throughout their lives.

Don’t underestimate the power of darkroom. The soviet union removed many people from many photos way before photoshop.

Heck, all you need for a good lobster or fish picture is some Forced Perspective. Hold the lobster as far away from you as possible, and have the photographer get as close as he can and keep you in frame.

I think I remember being told that a lobster could slap you very hard with its tail, but that may just be an urban legend