# How Big is Mr Winky? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 26, 2000, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941 "2000-07-26T17:37:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941/21 "2000-07-26T19:43:55Z")
Oh great. EJsGirl made all of my points while I was typing. ---
**Author:** ![KimKatt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ac91a4/32.png) [@KimKatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KimKatt)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941/22 "2000-07-26T19:53:03Z")
If I may… Size does matter, but not the way you testosterone gods seem to think it does. “The bigger, the better” is simply not true. One of the worst lovers I’ve ever had made redwoods jealous. But, he figured that having what he’d been blessed with was enough - that he didn’t need any technique at all. I taught him otherwise, and things improved dramatically, but he still was by far not the best I’ve ever had, though he was the largest. Having a good technique and less than perfect size is no problem at all. Having size and no technique is a serious problem. ---
**Author:** ![Bottle\_of\_Smoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Bottle\_of\_Smoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bottle_of_Smoke)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941/23 "2000-07-26T20:04:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mr. Cynical \* > \*\*Think “beer can.” A tall one. \*\* So should we call you **Mr. Fosters**? Or were you referring to those little Olympia cans from the 70s? ---
**Author:** ![soulsling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@soulsling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/soulsling)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941/24 "2000-07-26T20:19:11Z")
Mr.Winky is now to be referred to as my “throbbing blue veined rod of power” ::soulsling wakes up:: oh, i believe i have measured it and it measures somewhere abouts average. Question: would you ladies tell a guy honestly if his motion in the ocean was pretty lame and lacking? Or do you all fake it? ---
**Author:** ![KimKatt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ac91a4/32.png) [@KimKatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KimKatt)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941/25 "2000-07-26T20:23:05Z")
**SoulSling** : I tell him. But nicely - as in, teach them how to do it better. I do NOT fake it. Better he know, so we can deal with it, then he think his “throbbing blue veined rod of power” is doing the job when it’s not. ---
**Author:** ![Moirai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/96bed5/32.png) [@Moirai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moirai)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941/26 "2000-07-26T21:19:05Z")
Try not to fake, it encourages bad behavior. ---
**Author:** ![Moe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moe/32/2972_2.png) [@Moe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moe)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941/27 "2000-07-26T21:35:39Z")
Are there really women who actually fake it? I’ve heard about that, but I didn’t know that really happened. It just seems so silly to me. ---
**Author:** ![soulsling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@soulsling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/soulsling)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941/28 "2000-07-26T21:41:07Z")
I ask because I have never had a complaint. And most men I know have never had a complaint. So I wonder that if there were any possibility to enhance the lovemaking, why a woman wouldn’t say something, rather than go through it over and over again. You women are either very rare that speak with your SO’s, or I’m meeting the wrong women, or I happen to be superman in bed… I doubt i’m superman in bed. ---
**Author:** ![Satan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Satan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satan)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941/29 "2000-07-26T21:44:38Z")
I am the high side of average. But most importantly, I am perfectly sized and shaped for the person whom I lend it to on as regular a basis I can. * * * Yer pal, Satan _I HAVE BEEN SMOKE-FREE FOR: Three months, two weeks, three days, 19 hours, 44 minutes and 46 seconds. 4352 cigarettes not smoked, saving $544.11. Life saved: 2 weeks, 1 day, 2 hours, 40 minutes._ Visit [The Fabulous Forums of Fathom](http://fff.fathom.org/cgi-bin/Ultimate.cgi?) ---
**Author:** ![pldennison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9fc29f/32.png) [@pldennison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pldennison)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941/30 "2000-07-26T21:48:43Z")
> [@](#): > > How many guys have actually measured? Both erect & flaccid? Are there guys who **haven’t**? Didn’t you people see _Porky’s_, for heaven’s sake? My answer: It doesn’t matter. Mrs. pldennison is **quite** happy with it. ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941/31 "2000-07-26T21:50:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by betenoir \* > \*\* > Secondly, of course the first female to post beats me to my other point: Girth is at least as important as length. > \*\* So what’s a good girth? I’ve heard length numbers bandied about, but never heard a good number for girth thrown out. What’s the measurement standard? Circumference? Width across the top? What’s S,M,L,XL? Inquiring minds want to know… ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941/32 "2000-07-26T21:59:56Z")
> [@](#): > > You women are either very rare that speak with your SO’s, or I’m meeting the wrong women, or I happen to be superman in bed… I doubt i’m superman in bed. Maybe you are. Have you ever heard the comment “Faster than a speeding bullet?” \< Ducking \> To answer the OP, average (AKA, “Just right”, acording to my lady). ---
**Author:** ![Occam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Occam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Occam)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941/33 "2000-07-26T22:11:40Z")
The few women I have been with were never virgins, but they were sore after we had sex…but after a few times I “broke them in” and they loved it. My question is, Girls, does the size of your last lover affect the feeling of your next one? ---
**Author:** ![soulsling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@soulsling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/soulsling)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941/34 "2000-07-26T22:48:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Sealemon88 \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > You women are either very rare that speak with your SO’s, or I’m meeting the wrong women, or I happen to be superman in bed… I doubt i’m superman in bed. > > Maybe you are. Have you ever heard the comment “Faster than a speeding bullet?” > \< Ducking \>\*\* That was good. Ever read Larry Nivens “Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex”? ---
**Author:** ![DougC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7feea3/32.png) [@DougC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DougC)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941/35 "2000-07-26T23:00:03Z")
> [@](#): > > I know (I do them occasionally) that there are excersizes, called Kegels, that we chics can do to diminish our diameter… any thoughts? - green - - - If you wanna squeeze tighter, you need more muscles. For that, Kegels don’t work very well; they’re much like flexing your muscles to build bigger muscles. Which works, but it is a terribly, terribly slow method. - Much better than Kegels is a squat machine: get on one that allows separate leg movements, and then do a “bicycle” type set, straightening one leg while bending the other, while supporting the weight on both legs. (stair-climbers and bicycle machines do _not_ produce the same results; you _must_ use a squat machine) If you do this routine just once, you will ache for a couple days (all those muscles waking up), and after only 3-4 weeks of you doing this every 2 or 3 days, he will begin to feel a Heavenly Power as never before. I swear on my life that this is true. Do yourself a favor and try it just once; you don’t have to use a lot of weight (you can start with much less than you weigh), it doesn’t take a lot of time or that much effort, and it produces huge results much faster than Kegels ever can. - If you keep doing it and increasing the weight for just a couple months, you will see the inside tops of your thighs begin to bulge noticeably, and the whole area will feel more “solid”. You could do Kegels your whole life and probably _never_ accomplish the same thing. - MC ---
**Author:** ![handy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5a626/32.png) [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941/36 "2000-07-26T23:03:38Z")
Women often say size does not matter when talking with the guys but when talking with their woman friends they say it does matter. ---
**Author:** ![DougC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7feea3/32.png) [@DougC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DougC)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941/37 "2000-07-26T23:05:38Z")
- - - When I say “a routine”, I mean, get on the squat machine and extend each leg 20-25 times. This doesn’t take more than a couple minutes time. So yes, I’m saying that doing this for just a couple minutes, once every two or three days, and it will work as I have said. It’s not like a stair machine that you have to get on for a half-hour. - MC ---
**Author:** ![London\_Calling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@London\_Calling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/London_Calling)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941/38 "2000-07-26T23:26:53Z")
OK: Two questions and a predictable statistic (1) Where are you supposed to be measuring from – no one’s come up with a starting line. I can sort of guess but without some rules it’s a bit like starting the 100 metres from where the hell you like, and (2) Isn’t the size thing kind of proportional to your partner – there are some mighty big ladies out there and a few who seem to be not so hum…… hum…… hum……’weathered’. I mean trying to put a saloon/sedan in an average garage is one thing, but trying to get it in a dog kennel is an eye watering other…….was that a suitably masculine analogy ? And it’s a saloon/sedan, unless it’s a kennel – then it’s an articulated truck. Thanks for asking. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941/39 "2000-07-26T23:34:19Z")
A few points: (1) Anytime this sort of thing comes up, there’s 200 women all talking about how penis size isn’t important, while making comparisons to highway travel and ship navigation. The OP was mainly stating that most men seemed to lie (in his opinion) during penis length polls. No one was asking how important it was that it’s huge. (2) Yes, I’ve measured mine. I think i was listening to Loveline, the subject came up along with the 5.5" stat. I thought “What? I’m bigger than _that_!” and went off the check it out. (3) High size of average. Enough said. ---
**Author:** ![BooBoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/9de053/32.png) [@BooBoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BooBoo)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2000, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941/40 "2000-07-26T23:39:42Z")
Mr. Winky (actually…it’s Elvis, the King…thank you vury much.) is high average. If a woman complains about the size of your organ…just tell her you didn’t know you’d be playing a cathedral. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-big-is-mr-winky/26941.md?page=3)