# How can you lose 56 airplanes, 32 tanks, and 36 missile launchers? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 27, 2003, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-can-you-lose-56-airplanes-32-tanks-and-36-missile-launchers/177805 "2003-05-27T17:11:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![SuaSponte](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/67e7ee/32.png) [@SuaSponte](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuaSponte)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2003, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-can-you-lose-56-airplanes-32-tanks-and-36-missile-launchers/177805/41 "2003-05-28T21:10:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by imthjckaz \* > \*\*They’ll probably find them in last place they look. \*\* [pet peeve rant] Of course they’ll find them in the last place they look!! I fucking hate it when people bitch that, whenever they look for something, it’s always in the last place they look. The only way it is not in the last place you look is if **you fucking keep looking after you found it** [/pet peeve rant] OTOH, it is the Pentagon we are talking about … Sua ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2003, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-can-you-lose-56-airplanes-32-tanks-and-36-missile-launchers/177805/42 "2003-05-28T21:16:33Z")
Hey! My Brain Wave Generator™ is working! Look what I did to **Sua**! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2003, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-can-you-lose-56-airplanes-32-tanks-and-36-missile-launchers/177805/43 "2003-05-28T22:01:53Z")
> [@](#): > > The only way it is not in the last place you look is if you fucking keep looking after you found it i do that alot, usually because i don’t know i’ve found something. ---
**Author:** ![Blornx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b5a626/32.png) [@Blornx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blornx)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2003, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-can-you-lose-56-airplanes-32-tanks-and-36-missile-launchers/177805/44 "2003-06-03T14:00:30Z")
Dude, Where’s My Tank? Seriously Dude, Where’s My Tank? ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2003, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-can-you-lose-56-airplanes-32-tanks-and-36-missile-launchers/177805/45 "2003-06-03T14:43:10Z")
> [@](#): > > ## _originally posted by CRorex_ quote: > > ## Originally posted by NoClueBoy Is anyone else scared by Monkey With 56 airplanes, 32 tanks, and 36 missile launchers ? > > Ummm > > No comment. This had me cracking up. Everyone knows that **CRorex** works at a research facility, right? Good one. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2003, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-can-you-lose-56-airplanes-32-tanks-and-36-missile-launchers/177805/46 "2003-06-03T14:58:02Z")
Giving ticks enemas, no less! Sometimes, they explode. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Ms\_Boods](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5e9695/32.png) [@Ms\_Boods](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms_Boods)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2003, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-can-you-lose-56-airplanes-32-tanks-and-36-missile-launchers/177805/47 "2003-06-03T15:11:15Z")
My second- in- command cat is called Mr RedNuts cos his used to be… cheers, Ms Boods ---
**Author:** ![rockle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/73ab20/32.png) [@rockle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rockle)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2003, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-can-you-lose-56-airplanes-32-tanks-and-36-missile-launchers/177805/48 "2003-06-03T19:22:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lezlers \* > \*\*I don’t know why the hell this cracked me up so much but I haven’t stopped laughing for about 10 minutes straight now. > > (And I thought I was super-cool by naming my cat “Elvis”, I’ve got nothin’ on “Mr. Jack”) \*\* I know someone who named his cat “Mr. Pants,” but the cat has a complex so now they call him “The Cheat.” I made a tinfoil hat for one of my cats once. He loved his hat too. So much, that he was sharing sparkling silver barf balls with us for, like, _a week_. Also, > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by A Monkey With a Gun \* > **Psst, don’t tell anybody, but I got 'em. The home owners assosciation has been pissing me off and I’m planning a coup.** Can I borrow one of the missile launchers? I really need to take out the sumbitch who keeps driving over my flowers with the lawn mower. Look, I _know_ the grass is really tall because it’s done nothing but rain for the last 853 days, but how hard IS it to see a 3-foot tall **bright pink thing**? ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2003, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-can-you-lose-56-airplanes-32-tanks-and-36-missile-launchers/177805/49 "2003-06-03T19:57:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by NoClueBoy \* > \*\*I loved _Spies Like Us_ \*\* Especially [Vanessa Angel](http://ultrawarp.com/chevy/spieslikeus/vanessa_angel.jpg), right? 😃 Warning! Above link goes to an underwear-clad buxom blonde. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2003, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-can-you-lose-56-airplanes-32-tanks-and-36-missile-launchers/177805/50 "2003-06-03T20:13:31Z")
Where was it when you saw it last? \*sup[/sup] ---
**Author:** ![sickboy51](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@sickboy51](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sickboy51)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2003, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-can-you-lose-56-airplanes-32-tanks-and-36-missile-launchers/177805/51 "2003-06-03T23:36:46Z")
Maybe somebody took them for personal use, like taking their kids to a picnic or something… ---
**Author:** ![Xploder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/a183cd/32.png) [@Xploder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Xploder)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2003, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-can-you-lose-56-airplanes-32-tanks-and-36-missile-launchers/177805/52 "2003-06-03T23:50:52Z")
Speaking of cat names…my brother gave me two cats that he had named Elrond and Garfinkel…being the sort of person that just can’t stand to see a cat belittled like that I renamed them (of course) Fred and Barney. And if I EVER tried to put a tinfoil hat on them, they’d tweak right the fuck out. Then again, I CAN see Fred driving a little mini tank around as I have a remote control car that he loves to sit on while I zoom it around the house. ---
**Author:** ![buttonjockey308](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@buttonjockey308](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buttonjockey308)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2003, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-can-you-lose-56-airplanes-32-tanks-and-36-missile-launchers/177805/53 "2003-06-04T00:24:14Z")
Perhaps someone left them under some camoflage tarps. Or maybe, just maybe, someone forgot to hit the ‘stealth off’ switch before leaving their vehicles… —What Would Scooby Doo? ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2003, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-can-you-lose-56-airplanes-32-tanks-and-36-missile-launchers/177805/54 "2003-06-04T00:50:54Z")
56 airplanes, 32 tanks, 36 missile launchers. A majority of the nations of the world don’t have that much in their entire order of battle, and we can just call that an inventory discrepancy, “unaccounted for”. Another possible explanation: duplicate inventory numbers, or items entered wrong in the paperwork, i.e. the missile launcher got written up with a property # that back at HQ was input in the system as belonging to a HMMV. ---
**Author:** ![Ale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@Ale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ale)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2003, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-can-you-lose-56-airplanes-32-tanks-and-36-missile-launchers/177805/55 "2003-06-04T06:00:48Z")
Perhaps they forgot **not to** use live ammunition on a war exercise… :eek: ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2003, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-can-you-lose-56-airplanes-32-tanks-and-36-missile-launchers/177805/56 "2003-06-04T06:08:14Z")
“I lost it in the sun.” ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Plastic\_Ninja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f07891/32.png) [@Little\_Plastic\_Ninja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Plastic_Ninja)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2003, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-can-you-lose-56-airplanes-32-tanks-and-36-missile-launchers/177805/57 "2003-06-05T13:26:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by rockle \* > **I know someone who named his cat “Mr. Pants,” but the cat has a complex so now they call him "The Cheat."** The Cheat! I like the cheat. him and sb are the only reason I go to that website. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ccd318/32.png) [@Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paul_in_Qatar)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2003, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-can-you-lose-56-airplanes-32-tanks-and-36-missile-launchers/177805/58 "2003-06-05T13:37:06Z")
(Supposedly,) A true story. In the last days of the Soviet invasion of Hungary, a bunch of Soviet troops were sitting around a motorcycle cleaning weapons with gasoline. One thing led to another and the bike caught fire, destroying it. To cover themselves the squad claimed that a passing car full of “Terrorists” fired them up and the machine was destroyed in combat. The story stuck even through an investigating by the Military Poiice so an official report was sent up the chain. “Lost in combat, 1 motorcycle.” Well battalion had crushed a jeep, and so added a jeep to the list. Regiment had misplaced a missile launcher, and so it too was added. At division and corps other items were annotated. By the end of it all the “Firefight” had become a huge battle. All involved were given medals. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-can-you-lose-56-airplanes-32-tanks-and-36-missile-launchers/177805.md?page=2)