# How CAN'T you know the top of your ass crack is showing???? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 27, 2009, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720 "2009-09-27T03:28:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![St.Anger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@St.Anger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/St.Anger)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2009, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720/1 "2009-09-27T03:28:28Z")
Tonight as I was walking into my hotel a woman in front of me had the top 1/2" or so of the top of her asscrack exposed. I think she made an effort to pull her shirt down over her pants, but it wasnt a very good one. The fact that she was chubby did not add any aesthetic appeal to my viewpoint. Then there’s the old plumbers butt. I can handle an attractive woman with her pants hanging below her beltline, hey I appreciate a sexy woman. But there is nothing worse than seeing the top of a dude’s ass. I’m sure we’ve all seen it, and whispered “say no to crack” jokes to our fellow onlookers at this horror. My question is how can someone NOT know? Don’t you feel a draft? I also dont get people that dont wear belts. I would be paranoid that my pants would fall down over my ankles without one, and I always where a tight belt and pull my pants up tight to make sure the world is not exposed to my flat hairy ass. My question is—how can you NOT know? Setting aside young women who are trying to turn on men, are most asscrack people just plain stupid? ---
**Author:** ![johnpost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f17d59/32.png) [@johnpost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnpost)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2009, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720/2 "2009-09-27T05:04:20Z")
they know a crack is showing they are waiting for people to deposit flowers or pens or whatever might fit. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2009, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720/3 "2009-09-27T05:09:42Z")
Since I suspect that scientific studies addressing this issue are few and far between, this is better suited to IMHO than GQ. Colibri General Questions Moderator ---
**Author:** ![leander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/bcef8e/32.png) [@leander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/leander)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2009, 5:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720/4 "2009-09-27T05:21:40Z")
> [@johnpost](#): > > they know a crack is showing they are waiting for people to deposit flowers or pens or whatever might fit. I thought we were supposed to swipe our credit cards. ---
**Author:** ![Harmonix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Harmonix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonix)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2009, 6:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720/5 "2009-09-27T06:28:17Z")
> [@leander](#): > > I thought we were supposed to swipe our credit cards. Actually, it’s for spare change. [http://www.hulu.com/watch/2310/saturday-night-live-coin-slot](http://www.hulu.com/watch/2310/saturday-night-live-coin-slot) Sort of safe for work. ---
**Author:** ![chowder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/977dab/32.png) [@chowder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chowder)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2009, 6:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720/6 "2009-09-27T06:47:22Z")
> [@leander](#): > > I thought we were supposed to swipe our credit cards. Or to park your bike ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2009, 10:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720/7 "2009-09-27T10:00:11Z")
This reminds me of a man I saw pumping gas into a motorcycle, once. He was wearing a belt and suspenders. And he was still showing a significant crack. I made me wonder if he was fated to show crack no matter what he did to try and stop it. ---
**Author:** ![HongKongFooey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c4cdca/32.png) [@HongKongFooey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HongKongFooey)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2009, 10:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720/8 "2009-09-27T10:24:48Z")
The belt and suspenders were to put him out of his misery with. You missed your chance. ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2009, 11:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720/9 "2009-09-27T11:58:22Z")
If you have stretch jeans, which are terribly popular these days, they tend to stretch out and start sagging after a few hours. At that point they start sliding down your ass, and you start having to pull them up. Frequently. If you’re doing much moving around, it gets really tedious pulling them up all the time, and after a while you start letting them get lower before you give 'em another hitch. ---
**Author:** ![Purgatory\_Creek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/74df32/32.png) [@Purgatory\_Creek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Purgatory_Creek)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2009, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720/10 "2009-09-27T12:39:12Z")
The people who really need to take the blame for this are clothing designers. My husband has a terrible Plumber’s Butt problem, even though he does wear a belt. The trouble is that he is a rather tall gent (6’ 3") with a long torso and relatively short legs, so his jeans don’t ride high enough, and his shirts don’t hang low enough. Even suspenders don’t help. He’s also one of those guys who is always fixing something or building something, so there’s plenty of opportunity for exposure. Guess what he’s getting for a birthday [gift](http://www.duluthtrading.com/store/duluth-ingenuity/longtail-ts-longtail-shirts/longtail-ts-longtail-shirts.aspx) this year. I haven’t seen this phenomenon in women, though. Most of us that are a little, um, portly know better than to wear low-cut jeans. ---
**Author:** ![johnpost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f17d59/32.png) [@johnpost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnpost)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2009, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720/11 "2009-09-27T12:59:36Z")
> [@Harmonix](#): > > Actually, it’s for spare change. only those that wear pants with the cuffs gathered or tucked into their boots are looking for change. ---
**Author:** ![ZenBeam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/3ab097/32.png) [@ZenBeam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZenBeam)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2009, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720/12 "2009-09-27T14:05:23Z")
> [@Purgatory\_Creek](#): > > Guess what he’s getting for a birthday [gift](http://www.duluthtrading.com/store/duluth-ingenuity/longtail-ts-longtail-shirts/longtail-ts-longtail-shirts.aspx) this year. I really like the expression of the woman in that link. ---
**Author:** ![janeslogin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@janeslogin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/janeslogin)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2009, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720/13 "2009-09-27T16:07:09Z")
I don’t understand the problem. Why does it matter? ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2009, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720/14 "2009-09-27T16:18:03Z")
> [@Purgatory\_Creek](#): > > I haven’t seen this phenomenon in women, though. Lucky you. It’s not uncommon in overweight girls under 25 who like lowrise jeans. ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2009, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720/15 "2009-09-27T16:25:54Z")
> [@St.Anger](#): > > I can handle an attractive woman with her pants hanging below her beltline, hey I appreciate a sexy woman. Yeah, but unfortunately that never happens. It is _always_ someone whose asscrack you really don’t want to see. ---
**Author:** ![Savannah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@Savannah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Savannah)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2009, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720/16 "2009-09-27T17:48:15Z")
> [@Purgatory\_Creek](#): > > I haven’t seen this phenomenon in women, though. Most of us that are a little, um, portly know better than to wear low-cut jeans. Not in Los Angeles. [Malingering](http://www.therealmalingering.com/)specialises in mocking exposed crack and other faux-pas of clothes. ---
**Author:** ![pbbth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@pbbth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbbth)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2009, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720/17 "2009-09-28T01:00:38Z")
> [@St.Anger](#): > > Setting aside young women who are trying to turn on men, are most asscrack people just plain stupid? That is quite possibly the grossest way to attempt to turn on men ever. ---
**Author:** ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2009, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720/18 "2009-09-28T13:17:58Z")
A couple weeks ago I went to Back To School night at my 2nd-grader’s school. After the assembly in the cafetorium, we all split up & went into our respective classrooms. In my daughter’s classroom, we had to sign in before going to sit at our child’s desk. The woman in front of me- who was not unattractive but certainly not there looking to “pick up”- bent over to sign in and I was treated to a goodly amount of her ass. While I like seeing a nice ass as much as the next guy, considering the environment it was rather uncomfortable. There she is, bent at the waist right in front of me while her jeans were about half way down her butt, no panties in sight. And I had the same thought- how the hell do you not know what you’re doing? Don’t you feel the air on your crack? ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2009, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720/19 "2009-09-28T13:54:26Z")
> [@janeslogin](#): > > I don’t understand the problem. Why does it matter? Look, my job is to watch people sit at computers all day, among other things. The chairs don’t have backs. I see London, I see Asscrackistan. It matters, trust me. ---
**Author:** ![overlyverbose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9dc877/32.png) [@overlyverbose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/overlyverbose)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2009, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720/20 "2009-09-28T15:09:25Z")
My husband has this problem. Originally, it was because he’d gained weight and his butt crack had migrated northward because his pants were too tight. But he lost the weight and now has the opposite problem unless he wears a belt - pants are too loose - but with the same result. He usually wears a belt, so it’s generally not an issue, but he hasn’t gotten a new swimming suit in years. When we went to the beach this summer, I found myself occasionally walking up behind him to let him know that he might want to hike up his trunks. I guess he just doesn’t feel a breeze. I’m a little paranoid about my butt crack showing. Of course, that’s rarely an issue in maternity pants, particularly if you have a full panel that goes up under your boobs. They also condition you to feel a breeze on any body parts below the waist that suddenly become uncovered. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-cant-you-know-the-top-of-your-ass-crack-is-showing/511720.md?page=2)