# How common is it for gays to "come out"? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 19, 2010, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-it-for-gays-to-come-out/532975 "2010-03-19T02:45:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 7\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![SanVito](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sanvito/32/2805_2.png) [@SanVito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SanVito)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2010, 8:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-it-for-gays-to-come-out/532975/61 "2010-03-25T08:06:28Z")
> [@JR\_Brown](#): > > OK, fine. Lesbianism was regarded _by the male lawmakers and leaders who shaped the culture and by the male authors and artists who left 90% of the existing documentation_ from the ancient cultures under discussion (Greece, Rome, Japan) as something that existed primarily for the titillation of men; anyone want to challenge that? I don’t see why I have to spell this out in so much detail, it’s not like any of these cultures were noted for their progressive feminist outlook and validation of the female experience. :rolleyes: I don’t normally get all poetic on people, but this feels appropriate: “You may forget but let me tell you this: someone in some future time will think of us” — From “The Art of Loving Women”, Sappho, c. 630-570 BC, Lesbos, Greece. I’ve just been watching a programme on feminism, so you’ll have to excuse me! ---
**Author:** ![SanVito](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sanvito/32/2805_2.png) [@SanVito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SanVito)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2010, 8:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-it-for-gays-to-come-out/532975/62 "2010-03-25T08:17:43Z")
> [@KarlGrenze](#): > > And I want to say to **SanVito** , I kind of feel bad for her experiences. It seems something a bit rude to do to someone. > [/SIZE] Thank you ‘Karl’ (Karletta?), but don’t feel bad for me, it’s all part of the dating minefield. I’m now happily settled with a girl who doesn’t have any hangups about being out whatsoever. ---
**Author:** ![KarlGrenze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/dbc845/32.png) [@KarlGrenze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarlGrenze)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2010, 9:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-it-for-gays-to-come-out/532975/63 "2010-03-25T09:09:45Z")
OK… It just reminded me that they were acting out exactly like some despised guys… It is still rude. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2010, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-it-for-gays-to-come-out/532975/64 "2010-03-25T16:00:56Z")
> [@Chessic\_Sense](#): > > Ditto. With my generation (24), I bet at least 50% of women have had sex with another woman. It’s almost expected nowadays. It’s definitely not a porn fantasy. Definitely not. Especially since they’re usually not a fake-breasted blond woman and a fake-breasted Asian woman with belly rings, weaves and sparkly nail tips who squeal unnaturally and only position themselves in a way that will look good to an outside observer, regardless of how it feels (in many ways I think good lesbian sex is quite un-filmable). ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2010, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-it-for-gays-to-come-out/532975/65 "2010-03-25T16:22:36Z")
> [@Cat\_Fight](#): > > Definitely not. Especially since they’re usually not a fake-breasted blond woman and a fake-breasted Asian woman with belly rings, weaves and sparkly nail tips who squeal unnaturally and only position themselves in a way that will look good to an outside observer, regardless of how it feels (in many ways I think good lesbian sex is quite un-filmable). _shudder_ Seriously…what’s with the nails in lesbian-pr0n-for-straight-men? Those things are TALONS! I can’t imagine being a woman and wanting those things anywhere near there, unless you’re into pain. ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2010, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-it-for-gays-to-come-out/532975/66 "2010-03-25T16:25:39Z")
> [@Chessic\_Sense](#): > > Ditto. With my generation (24), I bet at least 50% of women have had sex with another woman. It’s almost expected nowadays. It’s definitely not a porn fantasy. Here’s a Swedish study from December 2009. They are amazed at the high percentage of women reporting sexual experiences with other women. The survey targeted women ages 18-24. And it’s 13%. Based on this, I would be very interested in seeing any kind of cite, study, reference of any kind that comes close to your 50% number. ---
**Author:** ![KarlGrenze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/dbc845/32.png) [@KarlGrenze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarlGrenze)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2010, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-it-for-gays-to-come-out/532975/67 "2010-03-25T20:37:01Z")
I think, and this may be a skewed perception, that if 50% _of someone’s partners_ have told you they’ve had bisexual encounters, the person may end up believing that this is true _in general_. And incorrect assumption, still… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-it-for-gays-to-come-out/532975.md?page=3)